Feel insucure with grad age, although women like me, advice?

[Jaylan]

Fraternities = status in college. Keep that in mind. Status/social proof can do magic in college.

And those guys are usually good looking bro type party dudes. I knew guys like that who were in and outside of frats. Both did well with women. People here really overrate status. Seeing how my chick friends behaved in college showed me that they arent as different from men as many would like to think.

Much of the time theyd see a guy, declare him hot, and want to bang him. And status didnt have anything to do with that. Actually, thats how the first girl I slept with in college had me pegged. We later had mutual friends, so I found out that as soon as she saw me at a party, she pegged me as the guy she wanted to take home. All on my looks alone.

Im not saying looks only matter, and that personality and status never matter....Im saying that many of us tend to underrate looks and overrate status. A girl generally knows if a guy has bang potential not long after shes looked at him....Ive heard women say this and seen them act on it. Status helps men, but its overrated at the same time as well.

 

[Skyy.]

they're not "usually good looking" lol they're just regular slobs in frats that get status and lots of pvssy somehow. Not going to get into that bs debate again, that wasnt my point. Everything matters. In College, status matters a LOT though, definitely more than money and more in proportion to looks than when you graduate.

I was in a frat all throughout college and I can assure you, regular slobs rarely get laid, even how high status they were. The majority of the school knew them, but they were struggling to get poon. I have been to countless frat parties and the good looking tall guys pull tail frequently.

As others have mentioned, looks trump status, assets and game for college chicks. This is nothing new under the sun. I'll even say Looks influence your status for this age group, given that you aren't a social retard. College girls control the Sexual Marketplace. If you think these chicks will fvck Ordinary Oscar the class president over Pretty Boy Pete, you are in denial.

Status, assets and game begin to become more important over time to women after 25.

 

[AAAgent]

Thanks for the response AAA.

I did underestimate the work that needed and I will focus on my degree and run 2 blogs.

However, from your knowledge and experience, assuming the blogs are a success, will those blogs help me raise my status?

In my opinion, having anything that supplies regular income like a business, blog etc is high value.

At the end of the day, I only want a good women and that is what I'm going for, hence I feel a good women will look for certain status since they too want a good man in return.

I've have not written blogs but i have been familiar with people that do write them. Most eventually give up trying to make money off the blog because it's tough. You need to build a readership from scratch and then write original new content on a regular basis to keep you audience engaged. No engaged audience means no viewership which ultimately means no money. If you are writing this blog to make money, then you'll have to devote the time and effort to put up original and interesting posts.

On top of that, if you don't have experience with blogs, i wouldn't even dream of running 2 blogs before even trying to setup 1. If making money were that simple as starting a business or blogs, we wouldn't have ivy league grads, business school mba's that are broke & unemployed.

Your blog is going to be your business, since you will have customers that provide you a revenue stream. If you want customers, you need a good product/reputation. To get a good reputation, you need people to know who you are and your writing. You don't just write a blog and they will come. Alot of people who read Rollo Tomassi's blog come from here. They see his wise posts, hear about his blog, and then go read it. Word spreads and he has a following.

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Response to Jaylan's comment

Dude, I saw good looking hippy guys with no status, and no money pulling sexy girls back in college.

I never said status is required to get girls, i said it helps getting girls. I also doubt that these hippy guys were ugly fat slobs. They were probably attractive and looks always factor into your status as well. Status matters in all aspects of life but it's not the end all be all.

 

[BeastofBizarre]

I was a creep in high school and now women like me. A certain amount of bullying and head****ery from women will be harmful, although moreso with me because I had psychological problems without it. Now I like to attract women just to tell them that I'm married. I require the souls of rejected women for sustenance. God damn, I'm glad I found a psychologist. Just remember, your scars probably won't show up front and if any do, own them and make them a strength.

You actually sound a lot like me. I'm actually going pretty slow with my schooling too and I'm also an attractive guy. However, I'm married and I just attract women out of strong psychological compulsions. Trust me though, once in you're in a relationship, your past will go away for a little bit. Not permanently, but enough to make you happy. You know that you're an attractive guy, now own all of your traits and run with them, because women will love you more as you love yourself. And let them know that you have your things together.

 

[floydb25]

Agree with the others... This is a complete NON-issue, and should not be on your mind at all. It's an unnecessary fear based on assumption, and WILL hold you back, and make you feel inferior and undeserving. You never want to go in with a failure or self-doubt mindset.

I used to be deeply insecure about my looks and abilities (also due to the past) - even AS girls were approaching and flirting - and the fear ruined everything. I literally sabotaged every chance with every girl due to my own low self-worth and inadequacy (or as I perceived it to be). I thought they were just being friendly, and convinced myself that I wasn't good enough for anyone. I was just fat, shy, inexperienced, anti-social, etc, and girls wanted the bad boy alpha with looks, or someone with more experience, or with more money and a better job - even though that wasn't the case at all... it's just how I viewed everything in my head. NONE of it was true, and the proof was right there. I just didn't believe it. Hell, I WAS a bad boy alpha with looks, but didn't see it that way... and no amount of convincing on the girl's part(s) was going to change that. Some were even begging for sex, and I STILL didn't believe it. Same goes for relationships.

Can't let fear or self-doubt hold you back. It's unfounded, and has no basis on reality. Don't focus on those who DO make it an issue, and convince yourself that it's right, either. Everyone is different. Kill that unfounded, irrational insecurity from your mind, and don't assume things - especially when it comes to what you THINK women want, or even what they SAY they want. Focus on the facts and reality.

 

[Mercenary of Love]

I do have attractive younger women interested in me purely on a physical level and I am well-read and charming, however, I'm unsure if some women may get impatient or even nervous at the sight of me graduating late. I am an attractive male.

How do you know they are attracted to you? Are random girls giving you the "come fvck me" eyes on campus? Those are the ones you should be going for.

I'm very insecure about the past, a lot of people have degree's by 23ish and embark their career at 24. Here's me graduating late and feel I'm not equal to those smartly dressed women who are in their careers or starting their careers.

Ahah - the root cause of the problem is that you feel insecure because you are imagining that people are perceiving you a certain way. Can you see how much inference, subjectiveness, and poor logic goes into that thought process?

Honestly, 24 is still very young in modern western culture. I'm too lazy to look up the stats, but if I recall correctly, the majority of students these days don't finish their undergraduates in the given 4 years, so you're far from alone in this.

If it makes you feel better, those "smartly dressed" career women are probably mired in credit card and student loan debt because they live beyond the salaries of their HR/PR jerkoff jobs, even if their jobs pay well. I've yet to meet a girl in her 20s who's actually smart with her money; most just piss it away on unnecessary car leases, overpriced clothes, and going out.

Women in their early-mid 20s are seeking status, alpha-maleness (due to wanting to commit to long-term relationships).

:crackup: LOL, chicks in their early/mid 20s generally have NO IDEA what qualities they are looking for in a man, and for the vast majority of cute modern girls, they're looking to have "fun" and "explore their sexuality" with whatever guys make them tingle down there, NOT to have serious committed relationships. Maybe 20 years ago, but not today (outside of the small number of more traditionally-oriented women)

I AM attractive enough physcially and mentally, however, I feel insecure about my past, although the future could be very bright, however, time will be taken.

What advice can you give me? I am an attractive male (ambitious, good qualities, desire to better my life, aspiration's, smart, passionate, purpose in life, keep myself in shape) however, I'm graduating late.

Just keep working on yourself man. Irrational self-confidence is a thousand times sexier to girls than rational (or in this case, irrational) self-doubt. You'll actually get better at pulling girls in your late 20s and 30s (hell maybe into your 40s if your so damn handsome) because you will have gained experience and status.

For right now, I suggest shifting your mindset to a setting where you:

1.) Don't take girls seriously and don't worry about a relationship (even if you want one, the neediness will drive girls away)
2.) Adopt an attitude where you are confident in your accomplishments as a man. As you see your businesses grow, this should develop naturally, but for now fake the confidence if you have to.