Fear on MSN, where have my balls gone?

[itishe]

There's this girl I'll consider my 2nd lead (not as good looking as my primary chase, but she's pretty good to me in terms of looks), and I have no problems talking with her at school (nothing really flirtatious, just kind of chilling). But when I talked to her on MSN (GOD DAMN MSN!) today I felt nervous/butterflies in my stomach, and it made me wonder what the hells going on. Anyone ever get this feeling with a person they already know?

 

[Holland]

no

 

[kegger]

No, it does not make since, I do my best work on MSN and Yahoo. I would just try to relax and stay calm.

 

[itishe]

That's why I was wondering, "what the hell is this?". After that it seemed only to go down hill with other females as well. It felt like I was trying to find the "perfect words" which would only flop. It felt like I was writing a script for a romance movie.

 

[Dr. Jim]

MSN I don't have the fear, but MSN/IM in general is a dehumanized way of talking. Keeping up conversings are harder because you don't have yourself talking to the woman and conveying yourself. It rellies heavily upon wording and trying to keep the convo interesting which can get tough.

 

[itishe]

I worked out for a few hours, got some tension out of me and I'm feeling good now. No more problems.

 

[DJ4Real]

Nah, I don't get nervous. Just be sure to be in your "right skin" when you decide to IM her.

 

[kegger]

Glad to hear you worked it out, I also found out if u need promise go into some chat room and pick any girl and try some of you pick up lines and so on. It really works with good practice on somebody you will never see again when you are not able to practice on real girls.

 

[Nzo]

Glad to hear you worked it out, I also found out if u need promise go into some chat room and pick any girl and try some of you pick up lines and so on. It really works with good practice on somebody you will never see again when you are not able to practice on real girls.

Dude that realllllly creative

 

[Sammo]

Don't think in to it to much. Knowing 'what' is wrong isn't going to help any. Stop trying to understand the fear and focus your attention more on overcoming it.

 

[itishe]

I didn't want to create any unneeded threads, so I will just add this to this one.

I've been trying to be more confident (I was already pretty confident, I do alot of public speaking, etc), but I've ran into something. I'm beginning to think people see me as ****y. Teachers are seeming to come on down for no reason imaginable in my mind, and with this stigma I feel like "Who wants to talk to a ****y guy?", then I start acting weird by not talking much (I almost feel like if I were to add something it'd be out of place, which is extremely out of whack since I'm very talkative most of the time). I'm just trying to be myself and not an emotional fountain.

Second, there's this chick I sort of been going after but I'm trying to remain neutral in my showcase so I don't appear too needy or something. But today I asked to see a worksheet of hers so I could copy it and out of no reason she told me she liked "Joe" more than me. Don't know what she meant by it, but just shrug it off right?

 

[kegger]

Itishe I understand what you are saying about the confidence thing, myself I can hold a long conversation with any adult, I'm 16, but I can not get what to say to my peers. It does not make sence to me. The second thing you talked about seemed kinda like she was trying to make you like her more, I really do not know how I would of replied in a situation like this. It has never really happened to me like that before. I am also interested in knowing what to do in that situation though.

 

[itishe]

I think I said, "it's alright". Sort of to show her I don't care and won't get upset by her remarks. I'm sure it was just a test.

Kegger I had the same situation (almost exactly) I could talk to any adult and keep a conversation up as long as it weren't too out doorsy (since I'm not a huge hunter/fish, etc.), and I also noticed I was acting very wussy to my peers (females at least). Now it kind of seems the other way around, almost as if Adults see me as some ****y rebel teenager.

About that girl again, when I'm online I'm running out of things to say to her (could be a good thing and gives an impression of, huh doesn't this guy want to talk to me?), but no matter what she keeps initiating the conversation.

 

[kegger]

I wish I could get the girls to initiate the convo on msn or ect. I always have to push a convo to even get them to talk to me. I found that if you run out of things to say start a game of checkers, ect. This gives you something to talk about.

 

[shadowfox]

real guys dont use msn there out playing sport...

come on guys? msn? it's just showing the girl you have nothing better to do...

Converse with them on the phone and real life (the girls)

 

[itishe]

Team sports suck balls, individual sports and lifting is where it's at. Also, what about the female being on MSN all the time, apparently she has tons of stuff to do.