Huffman
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 29, 2007
- Messages
- 1,509
- Reaction score
- 170
You know, I've been thinking about taking risks. I am not taking enough risks. I am dating (and f*cking) below my standards.
Today I saw a cutie on the bus. I caught her looking at me but instinctively looked away. I forced myself to look at her again but soon I turned away again, I just couldn't. Later I reflected on this - I had wanted to look at her, smile, see her smile back. But why couldn't I? I was afraid of a risk. Risk of failure? Death? No. She would just have looked away and that's it.
The true risk was: Success and then awkwardness. It was on the bus, I had no idea on what to do after that. I thought "ok, then if she smiles back I can approach her and should". But how? Usually I wouldn't on the bus aaaahhh chrrrrr mind freeze disengage, disengage!!!
You see, the possible awkwardness at Step 2 kept me from even doing an absolutely safe Step 1 (smiling). I must stop this fear from paralyzing me!
Tomorrow I'm going bouldering, there's lots of hotties there, some in groups some alone. I do OK - I have a couple of situational openers just to get the ball rolling, but still - I fear that she will accept (they usually do) and then we run out of convo and I can't do anything.
This has happened before and now I fear - awkwardness. This is the thing that's keepig me from doing batsh*t crazy stuff! Imagine yourself grabbing and cavemanning a girl, super awesome. What's the worst thing that could happen? She could call the police, but more realistically she'll fight a bit and then you let her go and it's bloody awkward.
How can I nullify awkwardness - or the fear of it? This is keeping me from getting to the next level.
Today I saw a cutie on the bus. I caught her looking at me but instinctively looked away. I forced myself to look at her again but soon I turned away again, I just couldn't. Later I reflected on this - I had wanted to look at her, smile, see her smile back. But why couldn't I? I was afraid of a risk. Risk of failure? Death? No. She would just have looked away and that's it.
The true risk was: Success and then awkwardness. It was on the bus, I had no idea on what to do after that. I thought "ok, then if she smiles back I can approach her and should". But how? Usually I wouldn't on the bus aaaahhh chrrrrr mind freeze disengage, disengage!!!
You see, the possible awkwardness at Step 2 kept me from even doing an absolutely safe Step 1 (smiling). I must stop this fear from paralyzing me!
Tomorrow I'm going bouldering, there's lots of hotties there, some in groups some alone. I do OK - I have a couple of situational openers just to get the ball rolling, but still - I fear that she will accept (they usually do) and then we run out of convo and I can't do anything.
This has happened before and now I fear - awkwardness. This is the thing that's keepig me from doing batsh*t crazy stuff! Imagine yourself grabbing and cavemanning a girl, super awesome. What's the worst thing that could happen? She could call the police, but more realistically she'll fight a bit and then you let her go and it's bloody awkward.
How can I nullify awkwardness - or the fear of it? This is keeping me from getting to the next level.