Fake Friends

[CoandaEffect]

I have one true friend and a bunch of fake ones. The one true one has been there when I needed someone and I would be there for her; yes she’s female.

The thing about fake friends is that you must set boundaries and not let them cross them. If they start using you then get rid of them, simple as that.

The question I ask myself is do they add anything positive to my life. By that I mean when I spend time with them do they add value to my life or do they bring me down. People that complain a lot or drink too much are examples of people that bring me down.

There is a saying that you become the average of the 5 people you spend most time with. I think that is very true so for any friends in my life I ask myself “do I want to be like them”. If I answer yes then I keep them as friends, if not I drift away from them.

Accepting RP thinking can be tough. My advice is take it slow, don’t make sudden changes (like ditching all your friends). As others have said it’s often best not to talk about it too much with people that don’t get it.

 

[cabaceira]

How old are you?

20 years old

 

[cabaceira]

Guys, thank you all for your answers. Really appreciate it

 

[Blacksheep]

How do you guys deal with fake friends?
I´m in a place in my life where i am reading a lot of books and gaining a lot of knowdlege, some of the knowledge was eye opening for me.
I can now see that my " friends " are all kinda fake, and i dont really relate to them anymore.
Also they are blue pilled people and all of them beta AF.
My real question is. How many REAL friends u should have in your life.
Is the red pill life lonely ? Or it is just my impression?
Love this forum , thank you guys for your attention

You will find who are your true friends when you don't have anything (money, status, beauty) to offer... Also women that have a genuine desire in you.

I'm Saying that based on my own experiences (I've came from a rich family with status in my town and this year I left all behind to stay away from my abusive parents). They have a big company here in my town and I had a job there earning 9k/month.

In that period I had the hugest amount of energy drainers around me. A lot of fake friends wanting to be around because I used to make parties in my house, had a lot of women hitting on me and partying on my house parties. And during this period I had a huge amount of sex with any kind of women. Also all of them wanted to date me (they got crazy to become girlfriend). I was on a good shape and good looking guy, so it helped a lot. When I got some pounds on... become bit difficult, but it doesn't changed so much.

So when I left my parents company and the house I lived. A LOT OF STUFFS CHANGED.

A big part of the guys that used to be my friends just left. My ex was still hitting on me almost everyday trying to get back the LTR... She completely stopped that after she found out I lost all my status. And in some part it was painful... But it was like getting rid of vampires who were always sucking on me.

These people don't want your good, they don't like you and they only want one thing in particular: to take advantage of the things you have to offer (parties, money, status), and they are jealous of you simply for possessing everything they don't have . So, they will always be wishing you to get screwed in life, just to be on the same level of misery as they are.

What to do with these people? It's simple. When you learn to identify fake and toxic people in your life, simply cut off contact with them completely. They don't add anything to your life, so there's no reason to keep them around.

How do you identify people who want your harm? Just watch the words that come out of their mouths. It says everything about someone's character.

A positive person does not need to offend you with words, even if he has to tell you something difficult.

A petty and negative person will always, covertly or not, try to make you feel bad. Trying to devalue you and using your mistakes as tools. And over time you start to get good at identifying these patterns.

Sometimes people act more covertly, which makes it harder to find out. Running smear campaigns and trying to cause your harm without you realizing it (until the snake bites you). They explore your weaknesses silently and manipulate you in a subtle way. Those were the worst types I ever had the displeasure to know.

You will find healthy and toxic people anywhere. They are here, in your job, in parties, bars, travels... And thats a good skill to develop over your life.

Another thing I would add to see if a person is being true with you, is when they make a mistake (like saying something that offended you or hurt you in some way). The one who is able to assume that and apologize to you and then not repeat that behavior anymore, they are honest people and they have empathy.

So how do you deal with fake people? Don't give them your time, your energy and your presence. Spend with the ones that really matters to you.

Hope that helps!

 

[Lordeterra]

20 years old

Yeah your at that age where your conflicted between going your own path and sticking to your friends. Here's the truth. Most of your friends are losers. How do I know this? Because 90% of the populations are losers. As you rise up see how most of them say you've changed, become jealous, or try to drag you down. Similarly watch as you hit rock bottom and see how many friends you have left. Focus on yourself and need no one and only hang around those with talent AND work ethic. Thank me later.

 

[Dash Riprock]

OP,

This is VERY common. You grow and move on and some friends do not. It's a part of life. I wouldn't say they're "fake" friends, your relationship with them has just run it's course. It's happened to me with MANY people.

For me, and I'm over 45, I have 4 "blood brother" friends that I've known between 20 and 35 years. We can argue sports, politics, whatever, and there's no way our bond would be fractured. We would all go to war for each other. I have maybe 3 more that are really close to being in my inner circle but not quite as close as the blood brothers. After that, I have varying levels of friends and acquaintances. The really close friends I've made that have stood the test of time I met when I was 19-33 years old. It does get much, much harder to find true friends as you get older. People get more involved with their own families, careers, etc., and I've found some start out nice but end up being strange or even envious.

If you're only 20, no worries. Keep on your path. Get involved in groups and hang out with like-minded people. You will meet them.

Good luck to you.

 

[2Rocky]

What you have are Acquaintances, not friends. You have them in your life for specific reasons. Appreciate those reasons, but don't mind the other parts. As you get older , you will grow into new circles and friendships. Relationship management is not just about the women we are having sex with...

 

[Black Widow Void]

We are on a social decline. As a kid, I remember there being more community in neighborhoods and with my older relatives. I'm not sure if people liked each other more back then, but perhaps they weren't so dismissive of people. When I was a renter, I knew my neighbors. Now that I'm older and a home owner, I barley say more than hello. You'd think that as a home owner, we'd be more invested in our neighbors - because they are probably going to be around the area much longer. The truth is, when i was a renter, I was younger and knowing those in proximity was more common place in decades past.

Seems like with nearly every decade, our environment seems to divide us even further. Following the internet, smart phones etc... we are now becoming accustomed to "masking ourselves" (literally) and keeping six feet apart from one another. I can't imagine what will be next.

I also had a question for you Çharismo (or anyone else that may have an answer). My social media experience was identical to yours. Seems like the individual traits that I recall from old school friends have been replaced with social carbon-copy behavior. And yes, too many people want a social media as a "fan base"... rather than using social media as a means to reconnect outside the platform.

My question is ... do you know of any reading material by anyone that has written about television and its impact?
I was thirty three before I bought my first internet ready computer. Therefore, I know about social behavior before and after the internet. However, I do not know what social behavior was like before television. I'm sure that somebody back in the 1950's or 60's has written about this and I'd be curious about the affect that Television has had on me and others.

 

[Çharismo]

@Black Widow Void

My question is ... do you know of any reading material by anyone that has written about television and its impact?

That’s a great question. I personally have never read any book written by anyone on the impact of TV. What I do know is that it is a medium of information, entertainment, and programming. No doubt it has revolutionized the way we view programming, watch the news and basically get information even though it’s highly biased, filled with propaganda, and corporate interests which is very evident because of the advertising and type of advertising that you see on TV which also promotes consumerism. (Buy, buy, buy, spend, spend, spend).

I know before the advent of TV...radio was the medium of information and worked exactly the same way as TV except the it didn’t have the visual element. Once the radio came out it wasn’t long before the television was made hence the black and white era of the media. (Look up Charlie Chaplin)

I know they used to show footages of WW1 and WW2 on TV and had correspondents on the radio providing all the minute details about the war as well so it’s definitely had a big impact on the world as well and obviously is still around and used to this day.

Before that they used to have newspapers and books which have been around since the dawn of civilization. Basically these are all mediums of information, entertainment and programming as well.

Nowadays internet and social media is the new medium of information, entertainment and programming and it’s becoming more and more sophisticated with all the different algorithms working to track what you are watching, what you are buying, what you are looking at, your location, ...etc. Again in the beginning it wasn’t saturated with advertising but again corporate interests are at the forefront of all these mediums.

Always remember corporations control the United States...they always have and always will but that’s a whole another topic. I personally stay away from all of this because it’s nothing but garbage. I stick to books and once in a while catch a glimpse of the news which itself is fear based and sensationalized. Hopefully this sheds some light on your question.

 

[christie]

Amusing ourselves to death by Neil Postman and Manufacturing Consent by Noam Chomsky were books that were interesting reads on the effects of tv and msm

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Yeah, i agree on the real friends will be there for you in the tough times.

You meet somebody. Spend time with them. Friendship develops, the more you spend time with a person. The more you get to know a person. The more similar you are to that person the more you will have a better friendship. Similar beliefs, interests. If you're both honest and look out for each other, that helps too. Thats real friends.

There will be friends you wont match with as much. Maybe you find them sly. They have other good traits, but maybe one bad trait.

Dont judge people to harshly though as you yourself are not perfect.

Learn pickup. Game FTW. The process will help you to meet and pull baeeees as well as make new pals. The unfortunate part of life is that, you will get older, red pill will alienate you from the normy conformy blue pill simps. You will watch your mates get cucked and divorce raped. You will see fellas hit their stride only to pump the brakes because of playing house. A lifetime friendship disregarded because captain beta busted a nut.

I'd be interested in playing the game to win. Cultivate a lifestyle. Disregard time vampires, toxic people, and anybody who is not on your side. Fellas will clash and butt heads. This is routine. It is disrespect or betrayal that you drop.

In the end, most fellas are here to pull and play house. Most are still blue pill and or purple at best. They are biologically programmed to follow their conditioning. The guys I troll are the ones who show up crying after being cucked and ditching their tribe. The reality checks are coming.

March to the beat of your own drum. Know that most people are following the beaten path and blue pill. Keep good people around regardless. Don't be phaggotry trying to red pill. Enjoy the decline. Pillage what you can.

Warning - by stepping up, many people are going to get angry. You stepping up is highlighting their amateur hour. One former mate bragged about how he is going to get 10s and rich now that he is single again. He crawled back to the ex gf who cucked him. Still working a dead end job and not even trying to get forward. These people are a joke. Don't be one of them.

 

[cabaceira]

Guys thank you all for your answers !!
Really appreciated it and learned a lot.