fake alpha female

[pyros]

I posted about this 19 years old chick before.

Today we went on a first date and I noticed that she behaves in a very uncommon way.
She tries to act 'alpha', but you can see she's trying too hard, I mean, she's avoiding to act like she would like to act and instead she's trying to be the 'leader' or the 'alpha female'.
For example, when we met today, I said let's go to X place which was 12 mins by car but she said that she did not really like that shopping mall, and she prefered to go somewhere closer so she could smoke too. Fine (just this time).

When I parked, she was walking ahead of me, like two steps forward, like muslim men do when the're walking with their spouses.
I made fun of her and teased her because of this. I called her muslim man, I asked if she was in a hurry, and I said that I was not gonna walk faster just because she wanted to walk that fast (intentionally fast). I said that I let her do anything she wanted just because it was a first date and I wanted to see how she behaved freely but that I took notes and she got -1 points. She laughed a lot everytime.

When we sat in a bar, we talked for 1 hour or a little bit more and she, in short, told me several times that:
a) she doesnt let men toy with her.
b) she is not an object.
c) if she has to stop a man that is going to far, she does it.
d) that she once punched a guy because he did not want to stop grinding in a club.
e) she doesn't have sex with every guy she likes.
f) she wants to be a policeman.
g) she thought about joinning the army, but she prefers the police now.
h) she had one bf for four years but he cheated on her.
i) she had another 'bf' for eight months.
j) she is single now.
k) her father is very strict.
l) her parents are divorced.
m) when we met in that latin club, she liked me cause when we danced I showed respect towards her.

Anyway, I can see through all this sh-it and what I see is that she is very insecure, she's probably been burnt several times, and now she's created this 'persona' to protect herself.
I also told her in a joking way that I did not like how she walked ahead of me, and she said:
"oh, it annoyed you? really? I didnt know it was gonna annoy you"
I teased her, she laughed, she punched me in my shoulder several times etc.

I have to say that we had a nice time as far as it can be expected, but eventhough I find her hot, I think we have not much in common...but she'll be a nice lay. She has to change this behaviour if she wants to go out with me, though.

In the end, when I dropped her home I was gonna go for the kiss but I clearly felt she was not 'ready'.

Anyway, what about this fake persona??? how come that she tries to act 'alpha'??
I've never seen this in a girl, ever. It was actually quite comical. She was like a child trying too hard to make me follow her, and do her way. lol.

She ended up paying for both coffees cause I forgot my wallet lmao.

Opinions please.

 

[logicallefty]

FYI the last alpha female I was with ended up leaving me for another woman!

OP your broad is insecure and has "something to prove" to the world. If you want any success at all with her you are going to have to beat her at her own show by calling her out on her cr@p even more than you might with other women. You will need to be better than her at everything she tries to challenge you on, and be able to out wit her with all of her sh|t tests.. These women are basically sh|t testers on steroids. You will need to show her that while she may want to be a man, you really are one, and she can not compete. Eventually, she may back off and lighten up with you.. But only once she realizes that you are always ahead of her in her little game of emotional Monopoly.

 

[marmel75]

Remember that one field report with those chicks at the club that you were grabbing asses, making out, and doing what you wanted to??

That Pyros needs to come back. She wasn't ready for a kiss?? Seriously?

Cmon dude. You should not be waiting to kiss these chicks at the end of the date. Kiss them in date at some point...grab their hand and put it on your d!ck...I'm telling you it's like a magic switch that gets flipped once you do this with women...

 

[Tictac]

If you spend enough time around horses, you will run into an alpha mare. They are rare but something to see as they are wild and free. They can be tamed, just not by any horse (male or female) in her stable or pasture. New horses, even stallions, added to an alpha mare's fold get the full treatment until they understand that she's boss. Trainers know tricks to bring a alpha mare to rein. It's just not easy or quick.

Maybe this chick is or wants to be that mare. But if you see she's faking it, you can tame her. Don't be a d*ck about it, just be both directional and firm. And be ready to do that for a while.

Best you keep a plate or two up and running too.

 

[grayclif]

You started a new thread about this girl again. I still think she wants you to lead. Going along with her changing the date location is just an example.

Kissing mid date then a few minutes later putting her hand on your **** never fails. They always take the time to get a nice full squeeze.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

This may who she wants to be. Or she might want a guy who will cut thru all her bs and lead. Many women these days want to lead and if you managed to stay in front of them too often they would not be happy.

 

[parkthebus]

Sounds too emotionally unstable to go out with her. Smash and dash.

 

[pyros]

it seems she has a lot of anger inside. She wants to look like a 'tough' girl, I mean, she kept saying that: she does whatever she wants, that she has very firm boundaries, blah blah

Anyway, everytime I teased her and made her laugh she looked like a little kid, naive and fragile.

Her parents are divorced. I dont really know what kind of relationship she has with her father.

 

[pyros]

this girl is just nuts.

Before our first date she got mad cause I texted her briefly.
Then we had our first date.
Five days later I text her, she replies a few hours later at 18:30. I was feeling sick so I went to bed and I replied to her the next day at 10:00 telling her sorry for the late reply, and I asked her a few things. No reply, and its been 1.5 days.

She's stupid as fvck, so she got so mad cause I took half a day to reply to her text, but I apologised, told her a joke and asked her about an examn she had... and now she doesnt even reply?

I guess she's hoping I am gonna text her AGAIN asking why she doesnt reply, or why she's mad etc. Nothing further from the truth.
1 I went to talk to her in that club.
2 I got her number.
3 I asked her out.
4 I texted her.
5 I texted her apologising for my late reply. ( I just said: hey sorry for the late reply. Did you pass that exam....blah, blah, blah)

I did more than enough.

Next.

 

[Berom]

I texted her apologising for my late reply.

Why did you apologize? You shouldn't have. You do what you want, when you want.

 

[mahser]

In my opinion, it was a bad idea to let her choose the place for the first date, but also the shopping mall wasn't the best idea for the first date though !
She seems like she's hiding behind her insecurities with this persona, anyway, i think u should show her who's the boss and be assertive and take the lead (actually u always should do that), she can be whoever she wants, but you should show her that you're the man and you're ahead of her and eventually, she'll back down to her own role.
another thing is to stop analyzing every fact, and if she really got mad because u texted her the next day then that is simply her problem, you text whenever u want !, and next time, never apologize for texting back late, if she mention it, just state that u slept early or was busy or whatever, but without apologizing, you did nothing wrong !
Finally, as long as you're waiting for her reply; she won't ! you clearly delivered the message that you're interested and now u should move on to other chicks.
just my 0.02 though !

 

[Julian]

The problem is your going full-blown beta just because you label her as some kind of wannabe alpha.

What you need to do is let her know that you know what you want, lay down the law and be of the mindstate it's my way or the highway. Only then will she respect you...when she knows you are above her. This doesn't need to be a long process, it's fukkin instant. stick to your guns bro fuk this *****

 

[Serenity]

Sure it wasn't a man? That description was pretty masculine.

 

[Genos]

My advice? It seems from what I've read that she's not your type of girl pyros. Even if she's hot...is she really worth the trouble?

Go find yourself a woman who is fun to be around, has (comparatively) fewer problems, and is hot as well. You are a DJ, you get to be choosy with the women you associate with. Don't feel that you must finish things with this girl, simply because she's attractive. Find and date a girl who is more fulfilling to hang out with.

 

[pyros]

yeah, I asked her out for a second date just because she's kind of hot but I was not very sure about it.
Anyway she replied to me 1.5 days later saying she's busy this week LMAO, can you believe it?

I havent even replied and I wont.

 

[Berom]

Go find yourself a woman who is fun to be around, has (comparatively) fewer problems, and is hot as well. You are a DJ, you get to be choosy with the women you associate with. Don't feel that you must finish things with this girl, simply because she's attractive. Find and date a girl who is more fulfilling to hang out with.

This.

 

[marmel75]

I tried to tell you, but you didn't listen.

Don't act like you have no part in this. Your lame texting and defensiveness when she called you out likely contributed 50-60% of her disinterest towards you after meeting. You just became "another one of THOSE guys" she has texting her all the time.

Bottom line, you need to differentiate yourself in a good way with hot chicks that have tons of options, not show her you are like 20 other dudes she has texting her.

 

[nismo-4]

You are guilty of Unauthorized use of a pedestal.

A girl gotta be more than pretty to get with me. She seems psycho. I dated an alpha female who kept trying to emasculate me and good god almighty she blew a gasket when I dropped her ass!

I knew I could do better. So can you. Get a better, more feminine woman.

Case closed.

 

[fastlife]

Is she the fake alpha here or are you? It's kinda obvious that she's running frame and you're letting her (with token teasing/resistance). Next time a girl walks ahead of you. Stop. Don't say anything. Just find something interesting to stop and look at and let her come back to you. Actions > words. (Just something small like that could've changed the whole dynamic of the date.)

You didn't go for a kiss because you took her words at face value (she's not that type of girl). Make her prove it next time. Actions > words.

I like alpha females--but the key with them is to give them a long leash (up until the point you sleep with them). Venue changes, etc. don't phase me; I'll always have something in the pocket if a girl expects me to call all the shots; but a lot of girls are pretty proactive about date ideas and I let them (not gonna argue with a girl about whether we eat at restaurant A or B). So I'll let them feel like they're in charge at first until we sleep together and they realize that I was controlling the frame behind the scenes the entire time.