Failure to leave your comfort zone= lack of success with women

[mahon83050]

I know this has been mentioned on here before, but it is true.

Think about it, in order to succeed in women or life in general, one has to take risks. When one takes a risk, you do not feel comfortable. You may feel awkward, anxious or whatever. However, we must break out of our comfort zone in order to be successful. This in regard to asserting yourself when necessary or going for that approach. Too many guys, including myself, wonder why they have no chicks and seven months or so have passed since they have had a date. It is because we are failing to leave our comfort zone and take risks. As I was riding home on the train today, I came up with a goal-oriented plan..all should try it (if they have no g/f)

Every month, I have to ATLEAST get two phone numbers or ask two chicks out...minimum. If I get rejected, it still counts!! If I have no prospects, I will have to find them and really do something to jump my comfort zone. If I fail to meet my required 2 #'s or 2 ask out's....I will punish myself (For example, not allow myself to jerk off for a week or not eat from sunrise to sunset on one given day) TRY THIS, I HOPE IT WORKS!!! I will continue this until I have a girlfriend etc.

 

[Virtú]

Risk and pain vs. "comfort zone" ... I wonder what these guys are going to choose

I think the real reason so few of us are successful in DJ-ing is because no-one has managed to keep it from turning into either a chore or an ordeal.

No offense, but it's posts like these, no matter how true they may be, that turn guys OFF to DJ-ing.

 

[DrSoSuave]

Easier said than done. Some of these posts were written by car salesmen types. I'm not a car salesman type and neither are more than half of the people that car salesmen like to scam with. If a girl is attracted to you and the feeling is mutual, go with the gut. If you hesistate, it can only mean you are not wholesomely attracted to her.

 

[car501]

Originally posted by Virtú
Risk and pain vs. "comfort zone" ... I wonder what these guys are going to choose

I think the real reason so few of us are successful in DJ-ing is because no-one has managed to keep it from turning into either a chore or an ordeal.

No offense, but it's posts like these, no matter how true they may be, that turn guys OFF to DJ-ing.

I have to disagree with this. I know of many guy's who are afraid to 'just do it' and would rather not bother because of the risk of failure.Thusly, they stay seated infront of a computer or TV and dont even try, afraid to leave the 'comfort zone'.
I think mahon83050 is talking about is setting 'goals' and sticking to them. Rewards & punishments happen in everyday life (i.e your job) for example.
Do whatever to get motivated and on the move. I agree that a girl will either be attracted to you or not. But, if you don't even get out there, you'll never find out.
I think mahon83050 is right on the money.
DrSoSauve says " If you hesistate, it can only mean you are not wholesomely attracted to her" Nope thats not true ! How many guy's here have seen a attractive girl and were interested in her, but were afraid to approach for fear of rejection.

 

[Blackgame]

I have to disagree with this. I know of many guy's who are afraid to 'just do it' and would rather not bother because of the risk of failure.Thusly, they stay seated infront of a computer or TV and dont even try, afraid to leave the 'comfort zone'.

I think hit it right on the head the come here looking for that
one thing that get them that one special girl then they
read the bible, then they think know every thing and become
keyboard jockes sub conciously thinking they don't need
women, there to good for women ect ect and use that as excuse
to say they don't have a woman morons get a life

get in the gym
get in field
get a girl

 

[Virtú]

I know the keyboard jockey well because I am him.

His problem is that he does not respond to pain and challenge in a positive masculine manner. Pain and difficulty antagonize him instead of inspiring him. Pain is still pain to him, and challenge tends to deflate his ego rather than inflate it.

Pain makes strong men fight harder, this is true, but it makes weak men retreat. Challenge and difficulty make strong men desire and act to overcome it, but it makes weak men succumb to intimidation and self-doubt.

My gym teachers always said "Pain is weakness leaving the body". It's true, but as a motivational tool, it only worked on guys who had only physical weakness to lose; in mental/emotional/spiritual terms, they were among the strongest I've ever seen.

You're not dealing with strong men here - extolling the virtues of pain and praising the honor and glory of struggle against difficulty isn't going to inspire a keyboard jockey.

You're dealing with "men" who are so weak AND so insulated that this whole "whatever doesn't kill me can only make me stronger" warrior mentality seems to fly in the face of logic. What the keyboard jockey is, the "Please God kill me now" mentality, is sick and it's wrong, a perversion of sorts, but that doesn't make it any less of an obstacle to the guys who suffer from it.

Until someone finds a way to make DJ-ing less painful than sitting in a comfortable chair and eating, drinking, listening to music, looking at porn, and playing a fun game ALL AT THE SAME TIME, the keyboard jockey isn't going to stop doing those things.

When you can pretend to be a strong, heroic man, a warrior and adventurer, while playing a computer game, you don't have much incentive to actually become one in real life.

 

[GodsGiftToFatBirds]

mahon,
you've got the right idea in that you've given yourself a target to force you out of your comfort zone. Couple things i'd suggest though:
if you're doing this to get success with women/ get a girlfriend, then i reckon your target of 2 numbers per month is too low. From my own experience, especially in my bootcamp, the majority of numbers you get lead absolutely nowhere. So at a rate of 2 per month, its likely to be months before you get anywhere.
And about your punishment for failure of not jerking off for a week: you'll probably help yourself if you do it no more than once a week anyway. Thats what i do, cos any more often and it drains my energy levels and takes away my motivation to get girls. Thursday's usually my day
good luck with it though mate, keep it posted how you get on