Eye contact the secret to confidence

[becker]

Ok, another post that emphasizes eye contact. How many of you out there are lacking in this department? Do you have trouble making eye contact with women when you see them? I think this has to be the most important thing to do. It's amazing how all women look into your eyes every time you talk to them, and most guys look at other things when they talk to women (like their bodies, which is a mistake).

Your eye contact has to be honest and you have to have a look of innocence about you, sort of like you're harmless, so you can make her open up. Anything sly looking at the initial connection is a mistake, because they will interpret this as a "player" look, and you'll be marked for life.

 

[Starman]

I was watching oprah by accident the other night..and this woman who was a world renown sketch artist for the FBI said women are VERY ADAMANT about eye contact..she went on to say..women(and her as a sketch artist) can look into males eyes and learn a million things about them..VERY interesting

this is from queendom.com..a psych site that takes surveys..and dabbles in human behavior

""What really gets me fluttery," says Yvonne, a 25 year-old musician, "is eye contact. When a man can hold my gaze in a way that is self-assured and alert, and not fawning, I am immediately interested. And it's not only the fact of the eye contact that gets me, it is also the type of eye communication. I like seeing that self-assuredness mixed with playfulness and a certain interest, or awe if you will, in what he sees in me. I think a lot is conveyed in the way someone communicates with their eyeballs, but there is also that mystery about what he is thinking that intrigues me." "


95% of men and women felt that a lot of eye contact is a real turn-on in a potential mate. Women were slightly more adamant about this feature, and both genders felt that this was more important for a long-term relationship contestant. And little or no eye contact is just as much a turn-off as good eye contact is appealing.

Good posture is an attractive virtue for 80% of men and women, who feel that it is slightly more important for a long-term relationship. And bad posture is even more of a turn-off than a straight back is a turn-on.

Frequent smiling is also very high on the magnetic index. In fact, over 90% of people find this attribute really draws them closer. And infrequent smiling was a definite turn-off with over 95% of people saying so. When present, these characteristics produce positive results in how others perceive you. But the absence of a smile, shifty eye contact and a slouch is a marked turn-off for the majority.

 

[BobbDobbs]

Originally posted by Starman
she went on to say..women(and her as a sketch artist) can look into males eyes and learn a million things about them..

Well, they believe they can learn stuff by looking into the eyes. If that were really true, players would be shot down left and right. In fact, almost no real information can be obtained by looking in the eyes, since the behavior is easily faked. However, you can leverage female's misguided belief in this alleged power of theirs.

 

[Starman]

ohhhh dont mistake that man!!

Im not sure exactly what it is in the eyes..the facial expressions? eye movements? dilated eyes..or what

but women somehow..read eyes..they can tell if u are sincere/fake/playa/etc..

I'd like to learn exactly what it is that they notice...

 

[becker]

Starman,

Interesting stuff in that post. I can relate to what they say there just on experience alone. Women are drawn to guys who can hold a gaze. I have always been pretty good at this, but I just never really noticed it until I came to this board. I guess that's why I've had girls become attached to me without me doing much.

I've had girls come and sit with me and just try to keep my attention because whenever they talk, I look them straight in the eyes and don't break away, almost looking like I'm seeing into their soul. I know it sounds a little corny, but that's sort of the way it feels, and if anyone knows what I'm talking about, I'm sure they'll agree.

I think it also seems to help that it's amazing how there are so few girls I've known who don't have gorgeous eyes, even if the rest of their face isn't as nice. I think that girls spend the most time making the area around their eyes particularly attractive. This goes straight to their whole belief that eye contact is so important.

If you can look straight into a HB's eyes, half the work will be done.

 

[becker]

Starman,

Interesting stuff in that post. I can relate to what they say there just on experience alone. Women are drawn to guys who can hold a gaze. I have always been pretty good at this, but I just never really noticed it until I came to this board. I guess that's why I've had girls become attached to me without me doing much.

I've had girls come and sit with me and just try to keep my attention because whenever they talk, I look them straight in the eyes and don't break away, almost looking like I'm seeing into their soul. I know it sounds a little corny, but that's sort of the way it feels, and if anyone knows what I'm talking about, I'm sure they'll agree.

I think it also seems to help that it's amazing how there are so few girls I've known who don't have gorgeous eyes, even if the rest of their face isn't as nice. I think that girls spend the most time making the area around their eyes particularly attractive. This goes straight to their whole belief that eye contact is so important.

If you can look straight into a HB's eyes, half the work will be done.

As for them believing they can learn stuff, well, it's not as important whether they actually do learn stuff, but more that they feel like they are. If you can make them believe they are seeing a confident, independent, but very attentive guy behind your eyes, then that's all that matters.

 

[Starman]

becker, I dont understand what it is liquor, eye movement, REAL 6th sense depth perception into the eyes..

but once in a while..I will gaze into a womans eyes..and just get CAPTIVATED..she can be a 5 or 6..but something in the eyes..just GRABS YOU

i think it may be the look of innocence..because I really dig, shy, innocent chicks

but whatever it is in the eyes..the movement..facial expessions to eye movements..or something psychic..Id like to learn more

psychology studies have researched that "innocent eyes" in both men and women and "seductive bedroom eyes" have been asociated with attraction

women in my experience have told me I have "devilish", "devious" eyes..Like Im always "up to something no good"

I have no idea how they see through this..nor how to change/manipulate it..

but I will tell you..EYE CONTACT is WAAYYY more attractive than no eye contact!

 

[becker]

Starman,

I definitely go for the shy innocent girls as well. I have an idea of what innocent eyes are, but what exactly are bedroom eyes? I've heard that term before, but haven't really known what they look like. Maybe there's a picture online that you can direct me to.

I think that any girl can look pretty good if you look only at their eyes. I have yet to see many girls who don't have great eyes. People in general all have great eyes I think, but it's not until you look deep into them that they really start to look nice. Also, long eyelashes help eyes look even better.

All I know is that if you lock eyes, your chances with a girl increase like 75% at least.

 

[Player_Supreme]

http://sac.napkinnights.com/pics/view_image.php?id=1225&ind=4

I look like a player. I look at women with player eyes. I am very successful in what I do.

Women know I'm a player and they are still intrigued. I present more of a challenge to them.

Women love men who are challenges.

I could never do the innocent....dear caught in the headlights....nice guy....please don't hurt me....kinda look again.

If it works for you then so be it. I tried that shyt years and years ago. It got me no where except for women to feel sorry for me.

As far as women having some magical power to read you just by your eyes...uhhh no. Sorry women have skills but not that strong. Most don't even know to look for pupil dialation or shyt like that.

Women will pick up on your whole aura, not just the look in your eyes. If you lack confidence then that will show not only in the way you look at them, but in everything else....from the way you carry yourself to how you say what you say.

 

[Starman]

PS..

Its been researched over and over and over again that MEN are rational creatures..relying on logic, realism, and objective empiricism

Women on the other hand rely on intuition, emotions, mystery, spiritual, abstract

thus the female and male mind works differently to gather, interpret & process information..

its not a "super power" that a woman possesses to be able to see something in the eyes men dont..but a learned, evolutionary strategy like ability that is grounded in intuition and emotion

just like a guy who is "street smart" can detect a bullsh1t artist off the bat..while a woman is taken with his deception

SKILLS

confidence in poise, looks, demeanor is definitely to your advantage..but there is something in the expressiveness in the eyes..that women follow their intuition to interpret

i.e. can you look at someone's eyes, and tell if they are happy, sad, sincere, lying, shifty, deceptive, trustworthy, etc etc??

sure as a male you have SOME insight..but to women this has evolved a bit more

Becker: Bedroomeyes..are the sort of seductive, non-innocent, "im up to no good" eyes...kinda like when you turn your eyeballs up to look UP at a girl..The same type of eye contact that is present during sexual encounters (not shy, sexy, "about to get laid" look)

I did a search on "bedroom eyes" and came up with some goofy shyat..but here is an example of male and female bedroom eyes(sorry for the retard celeb usage)

FEMALe

http://www.tgcom.it/tgcomimages/ArticoloTgCom88176corpo0immagine9.jpg

Male

http://www.bradpitt.tvheaven.com/images/bedroom_eyes.jpg

 

[Player_Supreme]

Originally posted by Starman
PS..

Its been researched over and over and over again that MEN are rational creatures..relying on logic, realism, and objective empiricism

Women on the other hand rely on intuition, emotions, mystery, spiritual, abstract

thus the female and male mind works differently to gather, interpret & process information..

its not a "super power" that a woman possesses to be able to see something in the eyes men dont..but a learned, evolutionary strategy like ability that is grounded in intuition and emotion

just like a guy who is "street smart" can detect a bullsh1t artist off the bat..while a woman is taken with his deception

SKILLS

confidence in poise, looks, demeanor is definitely to your advantage..but there is something in the expressiveness in the eyes..that women follow their intuition to interpret

i.e. can you look at someone's eyes, and tell if they are happy, sad, sincere, lying, shifty, deceptive, trustworthy, etc etc??

sure as a male you have SOME insight..but to women this has evolved a bit more

Becker: Bedroomeyes..are the sort of seductive, non-innocent, "im up to no good" eyes...kinda like when you turn your eyeballs up to look UP at a girl..The same type of eye contact that is present during sexual encounters (not shy, sexy, "about to get laid" look)

I did a search on "bedroom eyes" and came up with some goofy shyat..but here is an example of male and female bedroom eyes(sorry for the retard celeb usage)

FEMALe

http://www.tgcom.it/tgcomimages/ArticoloTgCom88176corpo0immagine9.jpg

Male

http://www.bradpitt.tvheaven.com/images/bedroom_eyes.jpg

You made good points. This is the only post of yours that I read on this thread. So I am lost as to the bedroom eyes thing.

I was responding to the orginators idea of looking like a deer caught in the headlights look as being favorable over looking like a player.

My point was that it's ok to look like a player. You don't have to try to look like this nice guy. It's ok to look at a woman as a player would. I don't believe in giving my power away when I look into a womans eyes.

So I think this thread has taken a different turn from what it started. I'm lost as far as the brad pitt thing also. Too me he doesn't have bedroom eyes. He looks like a player and his eyes look the same to me.

aight

 

[becker]

I think that certain women are attracted to certain types of eyes. The player type of eyes will attract a certain type of woman, but not every type. For example, a shy girl that is more conservative may feel a bit apprehensive about a guy with player eyes, but more attracted to the innocent type of eyes.

 

[mid_au]

every time i winked seductively at my ex she would get turned on like you wouldnt believe. just looking at her and winking would do it. dont ask me what or how but it sure as hell worked.

thats women for ya

 

[becker]

I've known girls who don't like people who wink because it seems fake or whatever. I think it can be a bit risky unless you know the girl well.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Originally posted by Player_Supreme

Women will pick up on your whole aura, not just the look in your eyes. If you lack confidence then that will show not only in the way you look at them, but in everything else....from the way you carry yourself to how you say what you say.

Right on player. What women can do is judge you right of the bat as to how you come across, and they'll make a quick judgement. Just like we see a hot babe, we know right on the spot wether we like her or not, not too much to think about or analyze.

What it possible is that a certain woman might be 'Anchored' to certain look, head tilt, wink, stare combined with a certain look, etc., from a previous man she encountered that made her feel good, and that will get her going without her being able to explain why.

 

[becker]

I did some serious eye contact practice today, and I made some girls get tongue-tied when they were talking to me. Love it, it's so empowering.

 

[Krassus]

Originally posted by Starman
ohhhh dont mistake that man!!

Im not sure exactly what it is in the eyes..the facial expressions? eye movements? dilated eyes..or what

but women somehow..read eyes..they can tell if u are sincere/fake/playa/etc..

I'd like to learn exactly what it is that they notice...

I'm a guy and i can read eyes. Not just eyes, body language all-together. I sometimes point things out to friends and am completely surprised when they tell me they didn't see the things i did. I just assume everyone can do it.