extreme masculinity vs. socialble happiness

[theory of knowledge]

i was going over the bible the other day and two themes stood out

1. embrace your masculinity

2. smile be happy and sociable

personally i always associated masculinity with guys like clint eastwood, john wayne and such...the guys that never smiled and are barely socialble.

i tried that, it didnt work well.

then there is smiling and saying hi to everyone, but this didnt seem very masculine to myself either.

so here im a little confused...hoping a brother would clear things up a little.

my gratefulness

 

[MightyMate]

You dont have to stare at people. Just keep Your head up and eyes open.

 

[MrS]

Be happy and sociable, and when concerning a certain girl you want to get with and win her over, be a man as the Pookster calls it mate.

 

[Okra]

find the balance in between the two. every situation requires a different approach. similing and being social doesn't make me feel like less of a man.

 

[Okra]

find the balance in between the two. every situation requires a different approach. smiling and being social doesn't make me feel like less of a man.

 

[Fender]

Knowing WHEN to be masculine and when to be friendly is a skill unto itself. This is why we need field experience- to get a good "feel" for the timing.

-fender-

 

[Visceral]

IMO ...

Masculine or not, women waiting for sex and men looking for friends probably will find a man who's sitting quietly and not doing anything to be boring. They'll probably also find the Clint Eastwood/John Wayne thing to be too intimidating even if they wanted to engage you in spite of you looking/being boring.

Unless you're the hottest guy on the planet or are in a position to let a panty-wetting reputation do the work for you, if you behave this way, women will probably assume you're not in a social mood and will keep their distance even if they desperately want you to fvck them ... and since you're not engaging them, you'll go home empty-handed for sure.

 

[SuPaF1y]

this is a really interesting topic, ive been working on this lately myself. i found that i personally do the masculine thing with a SLIGHT almost not noticable smile on my face. that way i can instantly change into talkative and happy when needed or stay in the "attractive" mindframe without ruling the happy mindframe out at the same time.

but thats just me

g, intense eye contact, deep tonality, kinda open lips, slow smooth and relaxed body-language. (I'm no master at this yet)

Overall popular social bodylanguage and behaviour: very chatty, smiling at everyone, fun jokes, good group dymanic where everyone get's to add his or her share(and you are responsible for that), fun topics and good energy, you being the center of attention(but not very obvious), powerfull varied and fun voicetone, keep your status by clever wit, kino'ing without hesitation, have a good reputation, etc. etc.

i aggree with that 100% and i say go the sexual route

BUT

you can smile without smiling. try it.

do that and you will feel happy while you are looking masculine. that way you can move into the popular and visa versa with no problem

 

[doctor]

Being sociable can also be put simply as be alpha. If you're the alpha male then you will be at the heart of the social group. In fact your jokes etc. will actually SEEM funnier.

Be a MAN at all times. Men are sociable too you know. ALWAYS have bodylanguage consistent with dominance and power. Walk with confidence.

I think the whole 'be sociable' thing - while true - can be acheived by NOT being antisocial/socially backward.

It might be best to define a man:

1. Be a decision maker

2. Be a leader.

3. Be COMFORTABLE in your own skin

4. Take pride in yourself.

5. Don't put women on a pedestel

6. Be in your own reality.

7. Live by your own rules.

8. Don't look for approval.

9. CONFIDENCE is key.

10. Don't sulk moap or strop.

A man is not necessarily a gunslinger who takes out desperados. He's not a bubbling well of straight anger. A lot of ultra male stereotypes you're looking at show only one area of masculinity blown up out of all proportion. You want to combine all the aspects of masculinity to become well rounded.

 

[SuPaF1y]

what do the rest of you think on this subject???


- happy and fun and get less girls

or

- look mean and tough get lots of girls but get people pissed off at you.

 

[Adone]

Originally posted by SuPaF1y
what do the rest of you think on this subject???


- happy and fun and get less girls

or

- look mean and tough get lots of girls but get people pissed off at you.

That's something I used to wonder about until some time ago. I've now come to understand that you REALLY just have to be yourself, meaning that you have to follow your instincts. Don't try to look like something you aren't. You want to be happy and fun? So be it, girls will always come.

Plus, you won't get lots of girls by looking mean and tough. You probably believe this, because you see tough guys who get lots of girls? Why? Either because they approach or because they are good-looking.

Anyway, now that I'm not afraid to look happy and fun, I get approached a lot more than when I tried to look mean and tough.


A guy I know is the perfect example, he always look happy and fun, but NOBODY has the balls to mess with him because everybody knows he could beat their @sses. Nobody has ever seen him fighting, but he has this aura that says 'I'll make you laugh and I'll be clownish, we all are going to have fun, but try to fùck with me and you are dead'. I think he's the perfect player, because he manages to be clownish, but not to be made fun of.

 

[SuPaF1y]

yea,

dont think about anything.

stay in the present.

and stop focusing on trying to make yourself better(future)

and recognizing your flaws ( past )

just concentrate on the now and make it the best now it could ever be by trusting your intuition naturally.