Excellent Book I'm Reading...

vudufixit

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"No More Mr. Nice Guy" by Dr. Robert A Glover. It's packed with concrete, useful stuff on not being weak, standing up for yourself, and pursuing success in work, play and romance.
Most refreshingly, it's compact (about 140 pages), and doesn't wrap its content in a long and clumsy parable (IE "Who Moved My Cheese type books).
Anyone else read or at least glance at this book?
 

Oxide

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yeah, but dont u find same stuff on here? is it a Ebook?
 

vudufixit

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Both formats...

Yes, it's out there as an e-book, as well as in hardcover.
I agree that it has a lot of stuff that's on the forum, but I think it helps reinforce the concepts. Plus, it's also nice that the hardcover is more portable than a comptuer! :)
 

Nickster

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When I say your subject heading, I suspected that was the book you were referring to. I loved it. Plus, you'll really think that this is funny, but I gave it to my mother, and she totally agrees with it. She saws that she can see how my upbring caused me to overemphasize being nice to everyone at the expense of standing up for myself.

There are various parts of the book that get into standing up for yourself and realizing that being nice just to get something is just as selfish as being a jerk and not caring about other people. I also realted to the part where he talks about guys who are emeshers in realtionships. It plain terms, the "try to hook up an emontional garden hose" to a girl, and she subconciously picks up on it and runs. This has happened to me many times before, and now I see why.

I recommend it to anyone.
 

Sting

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Sorry to ressurect an old post, but anyone have this in e-book form or know where to get it on a P2P network? I'd like to get it just to peruse it a bit. My preference is to have books in hard bound copy, so if I like it, I'll end up ordering it from Amazon.
 

trajhenkhet

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I'll have to go take a looksy at that one. I offer these books I read when I get the chance to:

The Book of Five Rings -- Miyamoto Musashi
Tao of Jeet Kune Do -- Bruce Lee
Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind -- Shunryu Suzuki
The Meditations of Marcus Aurelius -- Marcus Aurelius
Logic and Philosophy A Modern Introduction 8th edition -- Paul Tidman and Howard Kahane ( textbook)
 

RKTek

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Saw this review on Amazon.com:

"This book is based a false premise. The author notes correctly that many people use "niceness" as a means to manipulate others, and that people using a veneer of niceness to manipulate others often end up hurting themselves and their loved ones. The author is even correct in the diagnosis that the cure for this problem is learning to be true to yourself.

Unfortunately, the book carries the thesis that the problem is in being nice. This is his false premise. The real problem is that people who use kindness to manipulate others are manipulative. The problems that the author faced in his life and that he sees in many of his clients is that they are extremely manipulative.

The minor thesis of and major promise of the book is that, if a nice guy stops being "nice" to others, he will get more sex, and learn to bend others to his will. The unfortunate implication of this minor thesis is that it just turns the client from one type of manipulator into another.

The book is an extremely quick and easy read in pop-psychology genre. The main words of wisdom are to be true to yourself. I was dismayed to see the work fortifying the belief that all human kindness is just a way to manipulate others, and that we need to always question the motivation of others. Sometimes kindness is just kindness.

The book tries to label niceness as a disease needing a cure. This makes for a catchy title and a niche in the pop psychology market, but what little wisdom the author has to share is twisted in the works poor logic, I really couldn't give the book more than a two."
 

bp1974

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I bought it a while back and liked it.

Unfortunately, the book carries the thesis that the problem is in being nice. This is his false premise
I disagree. The main theme of the book is that what most 'nice guys' perceive as 'being nice' is anything but (ie. never disagreeing with a woman, always supplicating to her etc.). By always hiding who you are and what you want, which in your eyes may seem altruistic and nice, you're instead seen as deceitful, manipulative and spineless.

The minor thesis of and major promise of the book is that, if a nice guy stops being "nice" to others, he will get more sex, and learn to bend others to his will.
This wasn't my impression. To me, the main learning point was that suppressing your own needs and desires in order to accommodate someone else and keep them attracted to you is fundamentally dishonest and has the opposite effect. And even if you don't drive her away, you'll have a miserable marriage. I didn't see anything about 'bending others to his will' or otherwise manipulating people.

I thought it was a pretty good book, definitely worth the $20 or so that the e-book cost.

bp1974
 
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