Ex initiated contact out of blue

flowtheory

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I have no desire to respond and will ignore completely as she was a banshee from the pits of hell (which actually she was the catalyst of me turning to red pill, so essentially she was a great thing in the end). Anyways, my ex of 7 months back recently reached out to me.

Sends two messages via text saying..

Her: ‘Hi flowtheory, how are you?” (To which I ignored.)
-24 hours later...-
Her: “Lol you're funny. Anyway I hope your trip was good and that you've healed up from your surgery. I hope you're well!” (I had hernia surgery and went backpacking)

I don’t care to ever talk to her again. However I’m curious as to why a woman would be doing this. Especially since she was more-so the one who ended the relationship?
 

Dash Riprock

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Attention is a drug for woman as sex can be a drug for men. She probably just broke up with some guy and is looking for validation and significance, so she reached out to get a "rise" out of you. A reply from you would give her a little shot of endorphins and that's all she wants. Any request by you to get together even for a causal drink would be denied or she would accept and then flake last-minute, almost guaranteed. You would lose frame 100%.

Really good job not replying to her text. Most guys (90+%) would take the bait and pick up the crumb she threw.

Stay strong.

Dash
 

Spaz

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Attention is a drug for woman as sex can be a drug for men. She probably just broke up with some guy and is looking for validation and significance, so she reached out to get a "rise" out of you. A reply from you would give her a little shot of endorphins and that's all she wants. Any request by you to get together even for a causal drink would be denied or she would accept and then flake last-minute, almost guaranteed. You would lose frame 100%.

Really good job not replying to her text. Most guys (90+%) would take the bait and pick up the crumb she threw.

Stay strong.

Dash
Spot on !
 

Spaz

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I have no desire to respond and will ignore completely as she was a banshee from the pits of hell (which actually she was the catalyst of me turning to red pill, so essentially she was a great thing in the end). Anyways, my ex of 7 months back recently reached out to me.

Sends two messages via text saying..

Her: ‘Hi flowtheory, how are you?” (To which I ignored.)
-24 hours later...-
Her: “Lol you're funny. Anyway I hope your trip was good and that you've healed up from your surgery. I hope you're well!” (I had hernia surgery and went backpacking)

I don’t care to ever talk to her again. However I’m curious as to why a woman would be doing this. Especially since she was more-so the one who ended the relationship?
U handle it like a man should.

Proud to see some guys here keeping their dignity intact and have the balls to do so.
 

Murk

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Brought a tear to my eye, well played.
 

flowtheory

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Brought a tear to my eye, well played.
Haha

Thanks guys.

Yea, she and her new guy probably broke up. During the last weeks of her and I she had gotten in contact with her ex, and they met for a drink. He was a loser (her words) before and then she mentioned how he was making all this money and how ‘successful’ he’d become. So I’m thinking they ended up getting back together and have since broken up.

But the only reason she went on that date is because a girl who I thought was my ‘soul-mate’ (haha) when I was 22 had reached out to me a month prior (who is ridiculously good-looking). Like an idiot I my ex this, and she searched her via Facebook (was trying to be mature and transparent; this backfired heavily, but actually gave way to her showing her true self).
Anyways she goes on that drink and they start hanging out, to which she goes away with him for a weekend and then she sleeps at his place for a few nights all unbeknown to me; until she tells me at a later date while were in bed. I flip; naturally. Then excuse myself for a bike ride to clear my head. Come back home and proceed to kick her out of my house. Then she dumps me as she’s walking out and says I’m a horrible human. Super dramatic. And the next month is literally hell of emotions. She tells me how unattractive I am in every way... and I believed it sadly. But then I was like Batman and had to fall to rise again. And that’s where the red pill journey ya since begun. So in a way, I’m happy it all happened. Life’s funny.

It’s just interesting how the exes always come back. Not in just my case, but several others
 

derby1

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theres obviously a massive divide on this forum about exes, Depending on the reason for the break up ie if it was my fault i now have the knowledge to turn these women into plates and be ammicable with them, i bump into most of them on a fortnightly basis as i live in a small Town, our children might go to the same school......theres too many variables and im handling mine just fine
 

cola

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Read the back story. Treat her like she is already dead for the rest of eternity.

Even if you bump into her in a public setting and she says hello don't even acknowledge her presence.
 

ohrein

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No contact is the way to go. There's a lot of room to be an ******* with your ex but I think being the best you possible means treating people kindly, even if they don't deserve it. If you want her to stop contacting you, you should politely ask her. Other than that, just ignore it.
 

nismo-4

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Judge nismo approves OP's actions!

She just reached out because I only talk to her when I want her to suck my dik.

Exes do this when they need an orbiter to cry to or for some other favor i.e. business contacts, job offers, tech support, ego boosts, pic likes, compliments, etc.

There's a girl I work with who I stopped talking to because I saw she tried to use me in a beta role. She's still pissed that I won't acknowledge her.

OP, don't go back to the ex. You have other options. You are doing better. You can do better. Ignoring her shows that and I'm proud of you. She has you as some backup in case the new bad boy she's dating doesn't work.

Case closed.
 

Murk

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I know me and my ex are going to the same festivals, raves and day parties, I'll probably bump into her at least 2-3 times in the next 5 months.

Shall I just straight up ignore and pretend she doesn't exist - or go with a nod/hi and keep it moving? I've already avoided one event I knew she was going to but I can't hide all summer.
 

QuadDeuces

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All my exes come back eventually.
Usually they send me the "oops I accidentally texted you instead of my friend" text.
Or they send me happy holidays, happy birthday.
Or sometimes they send me a long essay that they have thought of me every day for a year.

I usually have a chat with them, but I am never the one to break no contact.
I break up with a woman, thank her for everything, wish her the best and then NC.
If she decides to break NC I have a friendly talk, if not she will never hear from me again.
But they all come back sooner or later, and it is only to check in, or to have sex only once or twice, but usually not more than that.

But if you have an abundance mindset, are able to forgive them and yourself for sh!t they and yourself caused, it isn't too difficult to talk to an ex.
I'm not a believer in rigid NC for ever and ever and ever. But that is because I have an abundance mindset I don't het hung up on a specific girl for long.
 

Paradiddle

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Attention is a drug for woman as sex can be a drug for men. She probably just broke up with some guy and is looking for validation and significance, so she reached out to get a "rise" out of you. A reply from you would give her a little shot of endorphins and that's all she wants. Any request by you to get together even for a causal drink would be denied or she would accept and then flake last-minute, almost guaranteed. You would lose frame 100%.

Really good job not replying to her text. Most guys (90+%) would take the bait and pick up the crumb she threw.

Stay strong.

Dash
Always spot on, bruv.
 

Paradiddle

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I have no desire to respond and will ignore completely as she was a banshee from the pits of hell (which actually she was the catalyst of me turning to red pill, so essentially she was a great thing in the end). Anyways, my ex of 7 months back recently reached out to me.

Sends two messages via text saying..

Her: ‘Hi flowtheory, how are you?” (To which I ignored.)
-24 hours later...-
Her: “Lol you're funny. Anyway I hope your trip was good and that you've healed up from your surgery. I hope you're well!” (I had hernia surgery and went backpacking)

I don’t care to ever talk to her again. However I’m curious as to why a woman would be doing this. Especially since she was more-so the one who ended the relationship?
I have nothing to say but applaud. Good job there not responding to her text. Now go buy some whiskey and take some sips like a man does. Don't even worry about why would she want to talk to you out of the blue.
 

Tell her a little about yourself, but not too much. Maintain some mystery. Give her something to think about and wonder about when she's at home.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

Paradiddle

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U handle it like a man should.

Proud to see some guys here keeping their dignity intact and have the balls to do so.
Exactly! While reading his post I thought he'd say something like 'I called her, we talked for hours but did not show up on the day we said we'd meet".
 

Spaz

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I know me and my ex are going to the same festivals, raves and day parties, I'll probably bump into her at least 2-3 times in the next 5 months.

Shall I just straight up ignore and pretend she doesn't exist - or go with a nod/hi and keep it moving? I've already avoided one event I knew she was going to but I can't hide all summer.
She exist. She's no longer important so she's dismissed and relegated to the bottom list of women in ur life.

Since she is no longer important and at the bottom of the list, what she thinks or even does has no effect on you.
 

flowtheory

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The exes ALWAYS reach out at some point again. I think I’ve only had one who hasn’t.
 

Spaz

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The exes ALWAYS reach out at some point again. I think I’ve only had one who hasn’t.
Never thought any of it until you guys brought it up, upon reflection yes they do. I think I've got like maybe 98% of my ex in my fb friend list, some of them I've dated since my early teens through my 20's and 30's.

Ninja moves by ex's, real smooth, initiating contact, adding as friends, chatting up and most down the line requests for meet up to catch up etc.
 

Peace and Quiet

If you currently have too many women chasing you, calling you, harassing you, knocking on your door at 2 o'clock in the morning... then I have the simple solution for you.

Just read my free ebook 22 Rules for Massive Success With Women and do the opposite of what I recommend.

This will quickly drive all women away from you.

And you will be able to relax and to live your life in peace and quiet.

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