Evolutionary Psychology reason for why females attracted to jerks. did you know?

[thechosenone2190]

I came across this website that has a lot to say about what girls find attractive in guys due to natural selection. One interesting fact is that jerks actually enhance the survival of a community, which I never knew before. My question is are jerks the ideal model to follow or is there a higher, more mature level of the alpha male that is more appealing than jerks?

"In a seeming paradox, females often choose to procreate with males who have a phylogenetic predisposition to wreaking havoc on order and stability - who are the sort one might expect to choose and succeed in heroic pursuit. The explanation for this instinct is that, without the perpetuation of genes that lead to such tendencies, the community loses its capacity to accommodate crises (disorder and instability - particularly, warfare and natural disasters) and so is at a gross disadvantage relative to a population that has retained this capacity. In fact, without this capacity, humanity might have already passed into extinction. The iconoclast is despised for the disruption he threatens or causes, until the day he is revered as a hero for saving society from far graver disruption."

In simple spoken language:
Jerks are good for a community. Jerks better prepare society for chaos and disorder eg. warfare natural disaster. Without jerks, society would not be able to withstand such events. Jerks are like vaccine shots. Jerks make good warriors/hunters/HEROES.

http://www.mega.nu/gender.html

 

[Jhcl4000]

I'm by no means a complete simpleton or an idiot, but can anyone who understands this put it in lamens terms for me?

 

[hydroheathen]

I think he means that on terms of natural selection, men who are able to "fight the power" will be able to "to save the world, save the cheerleader". Nice guys wont have the balls to fight super villains?? I guess it makes sense but those are the 2 different poles. Based on the teachings of this site I would say that a MAN would be able to take care of himself and the others in his circle (community). Without having to be a total ******* all the time.

 

[PappyS]

Basically the article is saying what so many people have been saying before: girls like bad boys, jerks, a-holes. This just gives an evolutionary reason for this behavior.

Lots of men get upset when women follow their evolutionary tendencies- e.g. when women bypass them in favor of jerks ("but I'm so nice"). But women also get upset when men follow their evolutionary tendencies- e.g. bypassing older women or women with kids in favor of younger women.

 

[Exhumed]

I think that women going after older guys is the stimulus and guys going after younger women is the response. But who knows? It's complex stuff. Personally I'd rather have a girl my own age, but if I can't have that whenever I want and there are girls available who are two years younger, ehh why not?

Very interesting post...is the terminology really all that confusing? Maybe I just have a large vocabulary.

 

[Jhcl4000]

I think that women going after older guys is the stimulus and guys going after younger women is the response. But who knows? It's complex stuff. Personally I'd rather have a girl my own age, but if I can't have that whenever I want and there are girls available who are two years younger, ehh why not?

Very interesting post...is the terminology really all that confusing? Maybe I just have a large vocabulary.

It wasn't the "big words" actually, it was that it made no sense the way it was written.

 

[Kerpal]

LOL, the "jerks" I know would be the first to die off in chaos, natural disaster, war, etc.

 

[Allurre]

Jerks provoke more emotional response (both positive and negative). These are the primary reasons why women gravitate more towards them.

In laymen terms, jerks = more excitement, more life, more thrill.

 

[Diaforetikos]

Also, I think girls choose to only see the good in the jerk. Then when they see he is a jerk, they try to bring out the good back in him again.

For example, when you first meet someone, you only see the good things in a person, because you don't really know them yet. But as time goes on, you slowly start to see their bad side.

For girls, they do the above, then after they see his bad side, they sometimes stay with him because they think 2 things: 1) they will see his good side again or 2) they can bring out his good side again.

This is just a thought from after seeing it happen to a lot of stupid girls I know.

 

[FinalWay]

Also, I think girls choose to only see the good in the jerk. Then when they see he is a jerk, they try to bring out the good back in him again.

For example, when you first meet someone, you only see the good things in a person, because you don't really know them yet. But as time goes on, you slowly start to see their bad side.

For girls, they do the above, then after they see his bad side, they sometimes stay with him because they think 2 things: 1) they will see his good side again or 2) they can bring out his good side again.

This is just a thought from after seeing it happen to a lot of stupid girls I know.

very good point. some type of fantasy.

 

[Just a Shot Away]

Can't we just say that women are f'ing stupid and be done with it? Women purposely seek out guys that treat them like s.hit and therefore lower their quality of life. If that isn't a sure sign of inferiority, I don't know what is (aside from watching a woman drive, of course).

 

[radiodude]

This means, all 'science' aside, that what women really want is a MAN who, when an intruder comes into the house a night intent on raping her and her child and then murdering them, that her man will at least stand up to the intruder and fight, preferably killing the intruder rather than cower in the corner while her and her children are raped and murdered.

Jerks at least display a character trait that tells women they would be more prone to standing and fighting than the whimp, who isn't even man enough to say more than two words to her.

Now, what women would really PREFER is a NICE MAN who is caring and sweet, yet also strong, defiant and passionate.

It's no paradox. It's how men were all created to ideally be. Society unfortunately tells men it's a paradox because they see no way that a man can be strong and nice at once. They (losers) believe one can't exist along side the other. However, that is the modern liberal thinking thats only come about in the last 50 years.

Be STRONG. This is key.

 

[MeteorMash]

All this science BS is unnecessary

Anyone with eyes can see that a woman dating a jerk either

A) love the excitment
B)feels like she deserves being treated like sh1t
C) is trying to "change" him
D) is just dumb/low self esteeme and doesn't feel like she can get anything better
E) Likes their confidence/ strength

There is no "evolutionary" science behind this. Hearing that term makes me sick. You don't have to be a Jerk to get women. All you have to be is just not a pvssy. How is that so hard a concept to grasp?

I have been told that I am the nicest person ever, and yet I have several girls interested in me, including my potential GF.

it's nothing wrong with being nice and doing nice things for people, but you should not be a pushover/ ass kisser either

 

[starplayer]

The jerk attraction is all evolutionary because:

1. The jerk is more masculine (read Pook - The secret of the jerk)

2. He can act like a jerk because he has more power in the relationship. This is because because he has more options (in the females eyes, he has more sexual value than the nice guy).

The ultimate point of reproduction is not to be friends with your mate, but to come together to produce offspring with the best chance of survival. This is why jerks do well with women.

 

[boomerick]

starplayer gets it!

 

[zekko]

He can act like a jerk because he has more power in the relationship. This is because because he has more options (in the females eyes, he has more sexual value than the nice guy).

Well put. The jerk does not give a sh!t about the girl. That means he is not attached to outcome, he can always go find another girl, and that raises his value in the girl's eyes. The "nice guy" may not have any other options, which drops his value to the bottom.

Women purposely seek out guys that treat them like s.hit and therefore lower their quality of life.

If women want to be led and told what to do, if women want to be dominated, then the jerk can fill the role. Meanwhile the "nice guy" is trying to figure out how to please the girl, once again shooting himself in the foot. Women think that any REAL man would not need any lowly woman, so again advantage: jerk.

 

[tafakna]

One interesting fact is that jerks actually enhance the survival of a community, which I never knew before.

Jerks are attractive because they are emotionally unavailable.

If your girlfriend calls you too much, you soon lose interest. If a girl you're pursuing is unmoved by your efforts and don't call you back, she becomes your goal in life.

Human aversion to loss and attraction to scarcity is plain psychology, it has been widely studied and there's no need for Darwin here (following the good old Occam's Razor).

Women likes jerks because they can't have them.

 

[King Turi]

Yeah, unavailability is what chicks dig.

Unless you are just going for a root from some wh0re at a club, then you just say "let's have sex" and it will happen.

To get a chick to have a crush on you, you gotta not always be available for her.
Works every time for me and I don't even realize what happened until a few weeks later.

 

[Just a Shot Away]

There is no "evolutionary" science behind this. Hearing that term makes me sick.

Actually, there is. You really think humans are that different from other animals just because we have iPhones, Google, baseball caps, automatic weapons, etc.? Please. We are no different. Human beings still operate on the most basic carnal instincts. Our purpose on this planet, whether you like it or not, is to make more humans. That's it.

The methods behind how human beings court and then subsequently mate are ingrained into our DNA. Your statements overflow with ignorance. Look up "sexual selection" or "Charles Darwin" in Wikipedia. Read the pages, then follow the related links. This is for only the most basic understanding of how our methods of procreation evolved.

 

[MeteorMash]

Actually, there is. You really think humans are that different from other animals just because we have iPhones, Google, baseball caps, automatic weapons, etc.? Please. We are no different. Human beings still operate on the most basic carnal instincts. Our purpose on this planet, whether you like it or not, is to make more humans. That's it.

The methods behind how human beings court and then subsequently mate are ingrained into our DNA. Your statements overflow with ignorance. Look up "sexual selection" or "Charles Darwin" in Wikipedia. Read the pages, then follow the related links. This is for only the most basic understanding of how our methods of procreation evolved.

I can see your point

but i'm still inclined to disagree. I believe we as humans, sure while are animals, are very different from other species. We do not fight to survive like other species, so our purpose is greater than just making other humans. Even God himself said Be fruitful and multiply, but that's not all he wanted us to do.

instead of drawing this out. I'm just gonna leave it at that