Ever called a girl out on her flakiness?

[altec]

Girl does weird things like gets in touch with me and says she wants to get together but then when I try to sort out logistics she just stops responding. She was *****y the last time we hung out so I just kind of dismissed the idea of getting together with her but then decided to give it another shot a few weeks later in case she was having a bad day.

I know the whole "if she is giving mixed singles she isn't interested" and I am at the point of moving on (met another girl last week and always on the look out to meet new people).

I know a lot of you guys will next a girl and just not even respond if the girl contacts you again/etc but I am likely to run into this girl again and just wondering if it is worthwhile to call her out on her BS behaviour. Up to now I have just been ignoring it and just dropping contact until she re-initiates or I decide to give it another shot. Have you ever told a girl that she is flakey and had that been a positive thing in your interactions? Feel like by just ignoring it she thinks that her behaviour is okay. I don't want to be like an AFC and let her see that I am effected by it but at the same time I want to be clear with her that her behaviour is BS.

 

[LandingWood]

Dude you're too invested. Next. Find a new plate. Don't bother responding cause this is your answer.

 

[JoshSway]

I have, but it never accomplished anything positive, so I stopped doing it many years ago.

 

[saywhen]

I personally never next anyone. It's always a positive having many women around even just as friends. I call anyone out on their BS. Female or not. I don't believe it diminishes any personal power myself. With women you gotta do it in a playful way though. Just show her a really good time, joke about her being a flake sometimes. If she had enough fun she will hardly flake again..

Another thing. I wouldn't try to hang out with a chick cause she's in a bad mood. You only want positive emotions being associated with you. Hanging around while she's upset will only associate those negative emotions towards you. Even if you are not the reason she's upset.

 

[thatfeel]

I have for ****s and giggles, they don't give a **** cause they know what they're up to.

 

[OrokuSaki]

IMO, If you've already smashed then you could but nothing positive will come out of whining to her if shes probably just not interested. It will only make her less interested.

 

[apprenticedj]

Yeah once but it was a little different situation. In fact it's what lead me here to SoSuave and I regret the way I handled it.

I had gotten out of a LTR and I fell super hard for my rebound chick. I did every AFC thing you can think of, bent over backwards for her, helped her out in many ways hoping this would benefit me in the end. Well it never did, she never really had any interest in me eventhough she said she did repeatedly to keep stringing me along. I hit a breaking point after her final flake and I LOST IT! I snapped on her, called her every name in the book and we had a huge screaming match.

After that I realized I was doing everything wrong and I set out to improve myself and become a DJ. But I do regret blowing up because it actually made me look stupid. If a chick has no interest in you calling her out will do nothing. That chick didn't like me anyways so I doubt she even cared about it. My advice is to next her and forget about her. The best revenge is a life well lived.

I would never do that again, never let them know they've got you bothered.

 

[smooth_as_silk]

My 3-word reply when they flake and contact you afterwards pretending that nothing happened: "Fvck off bich"

 

[nismo-4]

It doesn't do you any good unless you've f**ked her. So just go ghost and get another woman.

Case closed.

 

[m7ytn]

Yep

Just about 2 weeks ago...

I met this girl through a female friend at a school function, she was attractive...a nice balance of hot/cuteness, and sort of flirty with me.

Later that night I look her up on Facebook... eventually I got her number and asked her out to lunch...
First Red Flag--> she tells me that she will have to check her schedule...

I didn't expect she was going to actually give me a "free day" to meet up...but nonetheless, she texts me a few days later asking if I could pick her up for lunch the next day.

We go to lunch, had nice conversation. All seemed to go well, then after I drop her off she says to call her if I wanted to go out again. A few days later I ask her if she wants to hang out that Saturday...she says yes and seems excited.
She texted me that Friday and says that she would probably be tired from work Saturday and wanted to know if we could have a night in just relaxing and watching movies or something...I'm thinking this sounds good because I'm probably getting laid. Somehow the topic of cooking is brought up, and I said I liked to cook... she says "you should cook for me Saturday..." I'm cool with that...so I say sure...so far so good. Later that night she texts me asking if I like Tequila, and says we should do Tequila shots while cooking... I agree, and this reinforces the suggestion that I am getting laid come Saturday.

Saturday afternoon rolls around...
Red flag-->She texts me saying she is really sick and had a fever...said she must have caught some bug, and that we should postpone the plans. I say, well that is unfortunate, but feel better (in the off chance she is telling the truth).

A few days pass, she is still texting me. I start thinking maybe she is telling the truth about being sick. About a week after our cancelled date I ask if she wants to get together that weekend.
Red Flag--> She responds by saying she will be busy...The entire weekend.

She keeps texting for a few more days...One day I text her "Hey, whats up?"...
Red Flag--> No reply for 4 days...

So at this point I realize she is a total flake, delete her number and go about my life...of course, after the 4 days of radio silence, she randomly texts me out of nowhere asking when we were going to have that date so we could cook together, you know, the one she blew off a 2 weeks before... I have no intention of wasting my time, so I respond with, "I guess that depends..."

Of course she says, "on what?"

I say, "On why you blew me off for 4 days..."

Several hours later she replys with, "I was really busy!"

I don't respond.

I thought about going ghost, maybe I should have, but realistically I had already invested more time into her than I should have...she had her chance. Noone is so busy they can't respond to you for four days...the logical conclusion here is, she had other suitors. Anyway, haven't heard from her since. The best part is...I don't give a fvck.

 

[Harry Wilmington]

LoL - I just find it funny that guys' egos are so huge that they don't think women know what they're doing when they're showing clear signs of disinterest. Like, she hits you up and says she wants to do stuff but then doesn't respond when you try to set stuff up... and you're wondering if she's interested?? Or if you should call her out on her behavior?? Dude, she KNOWS she's flaking! Girls really aren't that complicated - if they like you, they find reasons to see you; if not, they don't see you. So, there's no need for you to bring it to her attention - she KNOWS she's not showing up. What, you think calling her out on her behavior is going to make her say "wow, you know what, you're right - I should stop doing that and start going out with you??" Not worth it, man.

The best course of action is to just STOP ASKING HER OUT and see other girls. If she talks to you again you can be cordial, but just know this isn't a girl that's trying to see you on that level. If she brings it up later you can decide what you want to do, but for right now she is CLEARLY not trying to hang with you that much. Don't take it personally, just read it for what it is and chase other girls. Hope this helps!

 

[altec]

Yeah, I guess the answer is to just not put up with the behaviour by not engaging her in conversation/responding to her. Just one of those things that I don't understand why people do it. She had the perfect opportunity to cut contact as we hadn't been in touch for a few weeks but I guess she wanted to know why I had disappeared or something.

Moving on and if I see her again I will be polite but that is it.

 

[apprenticedj]

I hate when they hit you up randomly after a few weeks or even months of NC. More than likely she is running low on attention or maybe a few orbiters dropped off so she hits you up to get you back in the fire. When that happens I'm nice and polite but I shut them down when they start talking about fake plans that will never materialize. It's simply not worth the mental energy to entertain the thoughts of a delusional attention *****. Sadly that represents a lot of women these days.