Escaping your SELF IMAGE

[Wonderbread166]

One of the hardest things for RAFCs to do after they find this site is to change their old ways. A pathetic, lazy, unconfident loser can have a hard time becoming an outgoing, determined, confident winner without a little work. You have found this website, which means you want to change, and you've won half the battle, but altering the habits that you have so well imprinted in your brain can prove to be difficult. So how can I do this, Wonderbread? How can I just say "fuk you" to my old, puzzy-azz self and live life free from fear of my own self image?

I was at the mall last weekend with my friend when my friend spotted a couple hotties sitting down at a table in the center area. He dared me to go talk to them. Since this went well with the bootcamp that I'm doing at the moment, and being the fun guy I am anyway, I said, "what the hell." As I began to approach, I thought, why not do something different on this approach? Get some new experience and learn something along the way. So I came up the the girls and said, in my best Texas accent, "Hey, ya'll! My names Wonderbread..." I got a good convo going, and told them I was just visiting from Texas. I got one of the best reactions I've ever gotten from a cold approach, got a funny story to tell my friends, and it made me realize something.

We define our self-images by our own actions. How stupid is this? The reason that I got such a great reaction was not because of the accent or mannerisms, it was because I was free to do and be whatever and whomever I wanted. I could make shyt up that wasn't true just for the hell of it.

SO... back to the question. How can you free yourself to become anyone you want to be? Well, first you need to start enjoying those cold approaches. They are your chance to experiment, and to be whatever you feel like being at the moment. Have fun with them, and you will begin to learn just how limitless you are, and how much potential you have. Hell, approaches aside, just do something thats different from your everyday life. Listen to a new type of music. Go for a run. Just go for a walk just for the hell of it. Your mind will react to change with more change, and you will begin to realize that it is only you that keeps you from becoming the man you want to be.

WondaBread

 

[CharmaLeo]

"We define our self-images by our own actions. "

This is one hell of an introspection and the key to change the so called reality in your life. Actually it can change a lot of things in life using the same dynamics.

You are 14 hey. Good luck in your playing the game my fellow DJ.

 

[Dirtheart]

That's really excellent advice and a very wise way of looking at things. Defining our self-image by our actions is absolutely right, and it also works vice versa. I mean, if you have a self-image that says unconfident loser, you're not going to act confident, because that's not "you".

I think it's important to realise that the actions and thoughts that define "you" or your self-image are not intrinsic. You can change your actions, you can change your thoughts, you can change the person you are.

So if you can imitate a Texan accent and feel freedom from doing so, you can certainly imitate a smooth and confident stud.

In fact, we all have alter egos, from the ego that jokes around with friends to the serious ego that walks into a job interview. We also have the winner and loser, the sad and happy, the confident and insecure egos. They're all part of us. We just need to nurture the most fulfilling ones.

Anyway, thanks Wonderbread for that very motivating post. It has certainly triggered an interesting train of thought in my mind.

Ps. Maybe this belongs in the tips section where it won't be so easily overlooked.

 

[Wonderbread166]

Yeah, can I request that a mod move this to the Tips Section?

 

[Survivor]

Originally posted by Wonderbread166
Yeah, can I request that a mod move this to the Tips Section?

Absolutely.

A man is not the sum of his words, thoughts or intentions. He is the sum of his actions. To have accepted and applied this truth at the young age of 14 is outstanding.

You will go far, young man.

Tips Section.