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Escaping the friend zone ever possible?

itishe

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I was talking to a bud of mine at work today and he asked me my opinion on something I really have no idea with. He asked me what I think is the best method of escaping the friend zone.

The only thing I could tell him is definately back away from her for a while, improve yourself, and put your attention into other girls/things happening in your life. Either she'll see the changes and be curious giving you a chance to put things in a different frame or you'll have moved on and be ready for something better.

The more I think about this the more it seems like this is the optimum course of action. In his situation he was seeing a girl for a few months, tried to make things official with her, and now she acts distant with him (it appears she isn't using him for an emotional tampon, which I imagine is a better sign than him being her therapist).

I told him to stop texting/calling/asking her to hang out because I've learned you really can't fix it no matter how hard you think "one more thing might do it" and give her a long time of space. Start working out, find new hobbies, and meet new people. Maybe try hanging out a ways down the road but if you do remain aloof but have a good time.

This seem about right? Anything to add? Is it even possible?
 

Tiguere

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i recently did it for the first time in my life.

met her in november 2010.

was ***** and never made a move. got friendzoned.

i decided oh well ill be her friend. talked casual .

may2011 too her to see hungover part 2 .failed to make a move . still frriends i.say my good byes after the.movie since i was going overseas in june. told her ill let her know when im back.

july 2011 got back to the states. texted her and she told me "what did u bring me"

i had a small bottle of liquor left (bought a bunch of bottles for relatives)

so i told her when i see her shell know. and she said well come over on your day off ill make a lasagna(told her during the movie that lasagna is my favorite dish.)

so i took my bottle and went to her apartment. we ate gave her the bottle and.opened.it myself and served us a couple of shots. she started dancing ...i mean really dirty dancing..the alcohol was making the effects and i just went for the kiss and was very welcomed.

ive slept with her a few time since. she knows i have a girlfriend cuz my facebook relationship status. shes hinting at more though.


my advice is if you wanna get out of the friendzone then isolate her and bring the alcohol alone and kiss her unexpedtedly. thats it if she doesnt like it move on. BUT AT LEAST YOU MADE YOUR MOVE.
 

itishe

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I got friendzoned before so I told him what I knew. His situation was similar to mine. We both made moves, had sex, had them into us but we both made the relationship mistake and they turned cold ultra quick. I came here cause I'm curious as well as him so replies can help us both out down the road.
 

Alex DeLarge

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itishe said:
I got friendzoned before so I told him what I knew. His situation was similar to mine. We both made moves, had sex, had them into us but we both made the relationship mistake and they turned cold ultra quick. I came here cause I'm curious as well as him so replies can help us both out down the road.
If you guys made the moves thats good. Things will be a LOT easier.. The concept of the "friendzone" is just a mindset. A girl has a pvssy, a dude has a ****. 2 + 2 = 4 you know what I mean? As long as you're not a totally awkward omega male getting your grove on again is completely possible.

Just give the girl space for a while.. I would say going a month without talking to her would be a good amount of time. Hangout with people, game other chicks or focus on other goals and just have a good time.

Take it from me.. I was in the friendzone with a girl I was in love with from when I was 14 up until this year.. About a month ago I kissed her for the first time and she seemed really into me. Then after a few weeks she went cold on me. I figured "well whatever, sh1t happens.."

Saw this girl last night for the first time in a month since she gave me the LJBF talk again. We were at a party and some girl was all over me and she looked JEALOUS. Even tried to CB me, but I just ignored her. Well we all left the party and she had one of her beta friends drop her off, then I got a text "Hey you should come over"... A drunk girl texting those 5 words on a weekend night at 1 am only means one thing.. ACTION.

So I go over this girl's house, we talk for a bit and she opens a bottle of wine. We just talked about how we hooked up and stuff before. She was all worried that she fvcked something up between us by hooking up, I told her "What did I tell you before? Nothing is going to change between us we were just having fun together." She then proceeded to tell me that us being together those 2 weeks was the highlight of her summer and that she was in love with me blah blah.. We proceeded to make out and she gave me a BJ.

Sometimes when a girl hooks up and gives you the LJBF talk, it means they're nervous. They're so attracted to you that they're scared of a relationship because they all eventually end. I think that's what the case was with this girl that I saw and it may be the case with your girl too.

There are a ton of factors that get in the way of keeping things going completely out of your control, you just need to give her time to sort them out and figure it out from there. She may have a recent ex boyfriend, focusing on studies, focusing on work.. Who the hell knows.

I hope this helps man, wish you luck!
 

Borknagar

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I had a girl friendzone me once, then she started trying to text me after the club wanting to hang out, and later told me she was always horny. I say if a girl blows ya off for dating but says lets just be friends, be total cool with it, hang out with her,talk to other chiks and game em and let her see it,if it works, cool if not ya got a wing girl, haha
 

What happens, IN HER MIND, is that she comes to see you as WORTHLESS simply because she hasn't had to INVEST anything in you in order to get you or to keep you.

You were an interesting diversion while she had nothing else to do. But now that someone a little more valuable has come along, someone who expects her to treat him very well, she'll have no problem at all dropping you or demoting you to lowly "friendship" status.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

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