Erasmus' Approach Journal

[Erasmus]

Well, this is my first post (though I've been a long time reader of the board, I only just registered.) I'm a twenty-something guy living in Edmonton, up in Canada. I recently finished a two year diploma in computer systems, and whilst trying to find my first job, I decided that it's about time for me to get my **** together. One of the things that falls under that umbrella is my abilities with the ladies. Although I've read or been exposed to just about every piece of PUA material out there, I've never done the basic mission of just going out and getting a whole lot of approaches under my belt. So now, it's time to start.
I'm currently also doing a program with a friend that he bought a while ago, called Demonic Confidence, whether or not that works out, I dunno, but I'm going to post the results from both that and from my approaches. I think I have an old copy of the DJ Boot Camp sitting around somewhere on my harddrive, and I might start that after I finish Demonic Confidence.
Anyways, enough blabbering, time for some shameless flattery! After reading about this stuff for the past 3 years, I've come to the conclusion that both the methods and the people on sosuave.com (the entire DJ concept) is absolutely the best thing out there. I'm really glad that I found you guys. Wish me luck!

 

[Erasmus]

DC Day 2

Today was Demonic Confidence day 2. I asked 30 girls what the time was while wearing a watch and pointing to it, and got it all done (with my friend doing it as well) in less than 20 minutes. I wanted to try approach a few of the girls beyond just asking for the time, but chickened out. Tomorrow I'm going to start the DJ boot camp as well.

 

[Erasmus]

DC Day Three/DJ Boot Camp Week 1

Well, I finished Demonic Confidence day 3 in record time (it wasn't very hard), and I think I'm going to stop posting exactly what each day is, 'cause I wouldn't want the DC people to get angry at me for revealing all their stuff. Still, it's a very sssssllllllooooowwwww ramp up in difficulty.

As well, I did the first week of the DJ boot camp today. It wasn't hard for me, 'cause I habitually look people in the eye and don't look away until they do. I don't know why I do it, but I do, always have. Moreover, I used to say hi to random people on the bus just for kicks, so that wasn't too bad either. So ya, I got an hour of eye contact and 50 hi's in today. Though to be honest I used 'hello' more than 'hi'. 'Hi' felt too short and awkward, and I got more negative responses to it than with 'hello', with which I got mostly positive responses.

At the end of the day, I saw a couple of athletic students from an out of town university (HB 7 and HB8), and thought that I should approach them. Like a fool, I didn't follow the three second rule, and chickened out. My friend that I'm doing this stuff with (who I'll call Tar) told me that was weak and walked up to them, direct style and told them he thought they looked interesting, but then as I was walking by, he completely wussed out, and *told* them that he was really nervous and that he was gonna 'skidaddle'. I mean, I recognize it's worse not to approach at all, but it's way more funny to see a guy walk up to a pair of girls, open, and then immediately bail .

I'm gonna start week 2 of the bootcamp tomorrow, and maybe even finish it in a day. I think that week 3 is the one that'll actually take me a week.

Anyways, that's all to report. Peace out.

 

[Erasmus]

DJ Bootcamp Week 2 - ETA 1 Hour.

Well, I'm gonna go and start week 2 of the DJ boot camp in about one hour. I'm gonna try for doing it all in one day, but I am *absolutely* terrified of it >_>. Say hello and making eye contact is easy, but I'm going to flounder so badly the first few times I try and have a short conversation with someone. Nothing to it, it's all about breaking out of comfort zones, but still >.< I'm scared.

 

[Erasmus]

DJ Bootcamp Week 2 Day 1/Demonic Confidence Day 4 & 5

So I finished days 4 and 5 of DC today, since day 4 was really really easy. Day 5 was harder, but I still got through it.
That's not the important stuff though, the important stuff is trying to get through the DJ bootcamp. Which is *hard* on week two. God. Damn. I managed a single 3ish minute conversation with an HB 8.
Me'n another friend were walking through West Edmonton Mall (which is huge), and were passing by the skating rink in the center. I was trying to psyche myself up to talk with people, when she walks by, and makes eye contact after looking past me at the skating rink. I froze for a second, before noticing her purse (it was a nice leather purse).
Me: Hey, that's a really nice purse.
Her: Oh, thanks, it's from Germany.
(She's obviously Canadian)
Me: Cool, did you go to Germany recently?
Her: No, my sister went.
Me: Oh...
(Awkward pause)
Me: So, where are you from?
Her: Oh, I live here in Edmonton.
Me: Cool, how long have you been living here?
Her: Well, I grew up in Edmonton, then moved away and recently came back.
(Start realizing that I'm just chaining questions)
Me: I see, ya I grew up in St. Albert (a city about half an hour from Edmonton).
Her: Cool...
(We continue to chat for a little bit, but it's obvious she's quickly losing interesting.)
Me: Well, I better get back to my friends, it was nice chatting with you.
Her: Ok, bye.

So ya. Things I realized afterwards:
1) I asked WAY too many questions, didn't make enough statements. I think I'm going to try and do Juggler's thing of using lots of open ended statements, next time.
2) I never asked her name... at all. That was kinda weak.
3) As a general statement, I have to be much more strict about the three second rule. Only one person? Not acceptable.

So ya, I'm going out again tomorrow, and while I've realized that doing all of week 2 in one day was unrealistic, I'm going to try for 4 conversations tomorrow. With any luck it'll be a better showing than today was. I can't wait for doing actual approaches instead of just conversations!

 

[Microphone Fiend]

nice first approach man. I don't think you asked waaay too many questions, i just think that you changed the topic a little quick. Good stuff tho, nice to see the first approach of the journal out tha way, especially somewhere as common as a mall. Good luck

 

[Erasmus]

Changing topics too fast... that's a good call. Gah, another thing to watch out for!

 

[Erasmus]

DJ Boot Camp Week 2 Day 2

Well, I decided to drop DC. It was helpful at first (it contained a more in depth version of the first week of the DJ boot camp), but now I feel I'll probably progress faster being more direct.
Today I went out to West Edmonton Mall again, for about two and a half hours. I was there with three other guys, all total noobs like me. At the start, I was just trying to start conversations, and not getting very far. I had super intense AA, and though I got one conversation started, I bailed way too early. Eventually one friend suggested I try using a canned opener, and I decided that since I wasn't making any progress anyways, I might as well. I used 'Who lies more', and did maybe 10, 15 approaches, but almost every time I faltered after the opener, and said 'nice to meet you' and walked off. Still, by the end of it I had literally no AA about canned openers. I'm kind of at an impasse here, so I've decided to follow an indirect game path for the next short bit, and tomorrow I'm going to practice 'transitions' (moving from the opener to a normal conversation). Again, I'm going to do it with canned material. If that works well, then the day after I'm going to try and use the canned opener, then transition, then move to a normal (non-canned) conversation. Assuming that it works out well (two days from now) I think I should be confident enough to go back to more direct non-canned approaches.
I know that Mystery Method is lampooned a lot on these boards, but for someone just starting out, it's a very useful crutch. My problem is that a lot of my AA comes from being scared about what might happen *after* I open, not whether or not I'll be rejected on the open. By using canned material, I can practice trying out the normal conversations while still leaving myself open to eject if it isn't working out. I know a lot of people will say I should just get it over with and do it, but the problem is that I'm *not* doing it when I try direct/cold/non-canned approaches. Anything that gets me doing it is worthwhile.
So ya... hopefully 3 days from now my AA should be a lot easier to manage.

 

[j0n024]

Good luck buddy...I get AA when I am first starting my FIRST set but after that I settle down and just go for a new chick. I think you should keep on going bud your doing good!

I think a good DJ can transition from a "Canned" to a "Direct" opener on the fly he doesnt just use 1 or the other but both equally....you shouldnt worry what happens after because whatever does happen YOU started and should take pride that you made the "Situation" that did transpire becuase you are learning to become a better person(Hopefully you understood lol)

Good luck in the future and here's to you getting lots of pvssy! lol

 

[the_govner]

What is this test you are taking? where do i find it?