Drama Queens

[Poosy Marauder]

I was getting a haircut the other night and I overheard some woman telling another..

"You know I need to have a little drama in my life"

A lot of women fall into this category.
I guess it comes from a life of watching soap operas and Oprah.

These women need to FEEL something..ANYTHING...even if it is a negative otherwise they grow bored and move on to the next guy.

This is why it sometimes pays to mix things up a little. One day be sweet and romantic and the next day be cold and distant.

Guaranteed she'll spend HOURS on the phone dissecting and analysing every nuance of your behaviour with her girlfriends.

They are intrigued by the changes in your behaviour.

I've said it before and I'll say it again.
Most women are emotional masochists.

They love a little relationship drama to spice their lives and have some challenge to overcome.

Opinions?


[This message has been edited by Poosy Marauder (edited 11-17-2001).]

 

[Take No Dirt]

Poosy Marauder, thanks for another superb thread!

Yes, I agree with you there! Women tend to get bored with the same old "nice" treatment they get with guys. They like mood swings it would seem so that their bodily system gets a good workout. Nice guys are always worrying about treating women nicely while jerks treat their gals like s***. The DJ (great guy) does it just right, i.e., he knows exactly how to push the right buttons with females. That's why women consider the DJ a challenge and a mystery in that his conduct toward them is never predictable.

[This message has been edited by Take No Dirt (edited 11-18-2001).]

 

[Wyldfire]

Originally posted by Take No Dirt:
Poosy Marauder, thanks for another superb thread!

Yes, I agree with you there! Women tend to get bored with the same old "nice" treatment they get with guys. They like mood swings it would seem so that their bodily system gets a good workout. Nice guys are always worrying about treating women nicely while jerks treat their gals like s***. The DJ (great guy) does it just right, i.e., he knows exactly how to push the right buttons with females. That's why women consider the DJ a challenge and a mystery in that his conduct toward them is never predictable.

[This message has been edited by Take No Dirt (edited 11-18-2001).]

Being unpredictible is good, but in my opinion, switch that cold distance to teasing playfulness and make the mood chage to something positive instead of negative. Usually you can get the same results but the woman will be in a much better mood. The cold distance feels like punishment and is best used when the woman does or says something that you don't like. Punishing someone who hasn't done something you don't like will confuse them in most cases. Again, this is how I would view that kind of treatment, and is not necessarily something every woman would pick up on.

 

[Take No Dirt]

Ms Wyldfire, thanks for your insight. You're right of course. A DJ has to gauge his gal correctly so he won't turn her the wrong way. There has to be just the right mix in order to maintain the challenge and mystery without driving the lady away. Boredom affects both males and females.

 

[Sir_Chancealot]

If a woman NEEDS drama in her life, you do not want her. Trust me on this.

 

[Juan_Man]

I agree with Sir_Chancealot. If you feel like treating her well, then treat her well. If she starts blowing you off, then she doesn't deserve you. However, there is a fine line between being a good boyfriend and being a total pushover. Don't go out of your way for her unless you feel it's the right thing to do.

 

[Jake Steed]

Excellent observation, Poosy.

You're right on the money. Every aspiring DJ needs to keep in mind that EVERY woman loves drama in their boring ass lives to some degree.

One of my exes, who I had a two year relationship with once said to me tearfully after I broke up with her, "Why is it the one who makes me feel the best (Jake Steed) is the one who hurts me the most?"

By the way, of all my relationships, SHE's the one who stood by me the longest and through the most hardships.

All because I gave her drama.

WOMEN ARE SELF-DESTRUCTIVE IN THEIR RELATIONSHIPS.

They say, "Ohhh, look at that hot guy on that motorcycle. He looks so DANGEROUS! I must have him!"

Then she gets him and 5 years later, "I don't like you on that motorcycle! Those things are dangerous. I want you to sell it and WE should get something more practical...like a station wagon."

OR

She sees a successful, career oriented guy and says, "Ooohh...look at him. He has his life together and he's so successful! He has such a great, exciting job! Ambition turns me on. I must have him."

She gets him and 5 years later she's throwing a vase at his head, "You don't spend enough time with me! All you do is work! If you loved me, you'd take more time off to spend with me."

See what I'm getting at? Why do women feel the need to seek out a guy and become involved with him, then try to CASTRATE HIM AND STRIP HIM OF THE VERY THING THEY WERE ATTRACTED TO IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Because, like Poosy said, women love drama. THAT'S why they get mixed up with jerks who treat them like shyt.

THAT'S why they love to "change" a man.

THAT'S why they start a fight with you over nothing 5 min before going out for New Years. (This has happened to me sooo many times.)

And THAT'S why HER INTEREST LEVEL WILL GO UP IF YOU WAIT AT LEAST 4 DAYS TO CALL.

My word is gold. Ignore it and be lonely or stepped on.

Jake

 

[BigBill]

There is a payoff.

My sister does this kind of thing bigtime. At first it got her a lot of sympathy and attention from me, my mom and the rest of the family. pretty soon though we noticed that she was going with these really loser drug dealer/addict types. They would kick her ass or do something really fukked up to her and there shed be cryying and suffering and getting all sorts of attention. Then the next week guess which guy she went back to?

hmmm.... we saw a pattern there. we ended up having to pretty much cut her out of our lives as a family which is sad because I love my sis. But love or no love I chose a certain life for myself that is free of drugs, crime, and the problems associated with them. Sadly, because of the life she has chosen I can't let her into mine without letting those problems and that garbage come in with it. I've kicked a guy's ass for her and could have gotten arrested for it (she went back to him later) and helped her get drugs when she needed a fix and finally I realized that if I kept it up, she was going to pay the price for her choices and I was going to pay right along with her if I didnt just let her be.

I feel the same way about any woman I might consider. Adn even about my twin girls. I love them more than I love anything else, and I'm doign all I can to teach them what they need to know to make smart choices in life. but if they choose drugs/crime/violent men, then I will love them...from a GREAT distance and make it clear to them that unless or until they get their acts together, they are not welcome at my home.

 

[JPFromTally]

I'm gathering from watching TV that it is now also becoming fashionable for women to admit they are drama queens. I've seen a lot of this when women are describing themselves on those dating shows.

 

[Gipper]

Interesting topic, Poosy, as always!

Yes, like the uncontrollable urge that salmon have to spawn, or birds to fly south for the winter, women cannot control the urge to create conflict in their romantic lives.

Why? is the main question, I suppose. If things are going well in a relatinship, the woman might feel she needs to add a little drama in order to "spice things up".

Perhaps her own insecurities generate a need for her to force the man to PROVE he still cares for her.

The man, on the other hand, is just grateful things have been cruising along smoothly for a while.

Women, of course, will deny they do this. It's like sleepwalking; they don't know they are doing it, but are powerless to stop.

Makes ya think, huh?

Gipper

 

[Don Phenom]

I have girls I know tell me that they create problems with their boyfriends just to fight. They know they need it, is sooooo stupid to us guys but hey. If they need drama to feel comfortable I say we give it to um.

------------------
Don Phenom-Unphasable, you couldn't make me lose my cool if you set me on fire. I will not lose!

 

[Wyldfire]

Drama, excitement...same difference.

Women don't like to be bored. If we have too much time to think we will overanalyze things and look for problems that aren't even there. That makes us start to get uncomfortable and insecure. That's when the imagination kicks into overdrive and all hell breaks loose. To avoid this, keep the woman on her toes so she doesn't have time to do this. Don't do it in a negative way, though, because that's kind of defeating the whole purpose of keeping her too busy anticipating to be creating crises.

 

[Take No Dirt]

Originally posted by Wyldfire:
Drama, excitement...same difference.

Women don't like to be bored. If we have too much time to think we will overanalyze things and look for problems that aren't even there. That makes us start to get uncomfortable and insecure. That's when the imagination kicks into overdrive and all hell breaks loose. To avoid this, keep the woman on her toes so she doesn't have time to do this. Don't do it in a negative way, though, because that's kind of defeating the whole purpose of keeping her too busy anticipating to be creating crises.

----------------

Wyldfire brought up some very good points there.

How many bored wives eventually cheated on their hubbies...

 

[Jake Steed]

"To avoid this, keep the woman on her toes so she doesn't have time to do this."

Or here's a suggestion. Maybe women should go out and get jobs like us men so they'd be TOO DAMN FVCKING BUSY to do this shyt.

Or maybe women should just stop being so FVCKING INSANE.

If I sense my girl is trying to cook up drama, oh I give her drama all right. I break her heart and make her cry.

Jake

 

[Gipper]

Originally posted by Jake Steed:
"To avoid this, keep the woman on her toes so she doesn't have time to do this."

Or here's a suggestion. Maybe women should go out and get jobs like us men so they'd be TOO DAMN FVCKING BUSY to do this shyt.

Or maybe women should just stop being so FVCKING INSANE.

If I sense my girl is trying to cook up drama, oh I give her drama all right. I break her heart and make her cry.

Jake

I sense some anger, Jake. Want to talk about it?

JUST KIDDING!

Gipper

 

[Wyldfire]

Jake, women aren't being "insane"...they are just different than men. We think differently, feel differently, communicate differently, process things differently. It's not something anyone can change, it's just how things are. Women get just as frustrated with men as men get frustrated with women and we don't understand you guys any better than you understand us. At the same time, we crave each other. LOL It's not fair, it's not easy, it drives you nuts, and it's pretty much the same hand we're all dealt with.

 

[Wyldfire]

One more thing...

guys don't normally see this "drama" coming. They get blindsighted by it, sort of like a hit and run. Women are masters at the element of surprise when it comes to this. You can be sitting there getting along great and having a marvelous time (or so you thought) and then...WHAM...she says "Does this dress make me look fat?". You guys ALL know that you are screwed no matter what you say to her and you didn't even see it coming. Mind you...about 15 minutes prior to this question, she was certain she saw you looking at a woman she thinks looks better than she does. She has spent the last 15 minutes convincing herself that you want that other girl more than her and she is compelled to "get to the truth"...of course it's totally irrational, but it's pure emotion and insecurity and at that moment, it all makes sense to the woman. Is she going to come right out and admit why she is asking this? Hell no! She's creating this crisis to get your undivided attention and make sure you stop looking at that other woman's @ss! It's sneaky, covert and works every damn time!

I'm really trying to help you guys be able to see this stuff coming so you can better handle it, but some of you are taking it entirely wrong.

 

[WildThang]

Originally posted by Jake Steed:
"To avoid this, keep the woman on her toes so she doesn't have time to do this."

Or here's a suggestion. Maybe women should go out and get jobs like us men so they'd be TOO DAMN FVCKING BUSY to do this shyt.

Or maybe women should just stop being so FVCKING INSANE.

If I sense my girl is trying to cook up drama, oh I give her drama all right. I break her heart and make her cry.

Jake

Why do women feel that it's somehow acceptable to do this stuff? 'Oh well, we're just girls, that's how we are. So you have to put up with it...'

BULL****!

If a guy says he wants to do something guy-like, like fishing or watching sports, just watch the women start to whine and bust his balls.

But princesses think they're the center of the universe, and if their guy's attention isn't on *them*, why - the evil sonofa***** is so going to pay for that.

Not insane? Are you kidding? Would you put up with a man who acted like that?

Ladies - get a grip. If you want drama, go find acting classes. But get off our case just because sometimes we want peace in the house instead of insane fighting and other crap like that.

Fact is, drama queens are ****ed-up *losers*. Some chicks are steady as a rock. They get their highs, clean, from the fun stuff, with no emotional fall out.

You can find one if you want to. Don't waste your time and energy on someone who doesn't understand that, or thinks her precious feelings are so important that she feels totally justified about trying to screw your life up with her childish girly BS.

 

[Wyldfire]

Wildthang...in order to avoid that behavior you should focus on women who are able to communicate with men on more of a man's level. The majority of women just can't do that. Men either learn to work around that NORMAL (for women, not for men) girly girl behavior or they find themselves a girl they can genuinely relate to and hang on to her.

You just can't expect to turn women into men that look like women...it's not realistic. No, you don't have to stay with someone that does something that drives you batty, but you also can't change women to suit your idea of what she is supposed to be anymore than women can do that to men.

 

[Gipper]

Hey Wyldfire! You need to take off whatever you're wearing that has a bullseye painted on it! Somebody's gunnin' for ya sweetheart!

Gipper