Don't let this stuff consume you.

[squirrels]

This "Don Juan" stuff...it works great for keeping control of yourself in a world filled with crazy female minds. It'll help you understand. But a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.

Sometimes, the very thing that keeps you alive in the dating game can also keep you alone. All of these seduction-angles we play...they can wreck women's confidence and self-esteem, can drive girls crazy that would have otherwise been "stable", and can end up destroying the affection they have for you. Be careful of engendering a "love-hate" relationship just so you can feed on the "love" part.

Sometimes the fortresses we build around our hearts and minds turn into prisons. Sometimes the ideas you implant in someone else's mind can grow into something that destroys them...or you. YOU can end up becoming the "crazy one". When you start to see the "truth" of human nature, you can end up shutting EVERYONE out, to the point where you turn intimacy with EVERYONE into a mind-f*ck competition, pushing them away to arm's length while trying to keep them from taking off completely.

If you have low self-esteem, "Juanning" it up is not the answer. The truth is in your own self-image. Become a worthy person, seek always to improve, and take pride in who you are. Believe you're the kind of man that a good woman would love to be with...act like that kind of man...and begin to see yourself as him.

 

[Buddha_Mind]

Squirrels man, this was my exact conundrum last December when I left this forum for awhile. It was penetrating my mind and skewing my perception and the "natural flow" for me in my relation to female-interaction.

I entered into an LTR that month which is now dead, and I can say some of my misconceptions did negatively effect my LTR (I was still actively reading some gaming material)...I ended up falling in Love, and well, got to taste some of the bitterness that comes with that feeling when the whole thing ends.

IDK -- there is SOME value here. IF I had been actively reading this board I probably would NOT have made some MISTAKES. BUT, by my entrainment with many of these Juanning concepts, I probably too DID make some mistakes because of this material.

It's a double-edged sword in some ways. Some of this stuff can help. Some of it can hurt. It's like what you told me for my "Who Knows?" thread, a time where my mind was spinning about all of this **** (truly looking to find a gratifying relationship) -- you said:

Nobody knows.

And that's the truth. Nobody has the almighty secret answer to Women. That's like expecting to have the answers to Why We Are Here, or What Purpose I serve -- some of these questions live in an abstract world where exactitudes can't be held between the forefinger and thumb.

It's fvcked up man -- it really is. I think there is some polarization towards the "dark side" that this forum can generate too.

I can tell you one thing Squirrels, from what I've simply gathered via an internet based forum: you're a super smart and intelligent dude who takes what he wants and grabs it by the balls and makes it happen. Closing yourself off to the world will not fully get you what you want -- but the hard part is figuring out who the right people are to open up to, and to what degrees they have gained your trust.

I would like it if life and human relationships were more simple.

I agree with your last line...be the the kind of man women would want to be with...or be the kind of man YOU want to be to find the woman YOU want.

Stay up brother. You definitely help others here...we can't imprison our hearts....part of life is loving, part of life is losing love, part of life is this whole damned thing and at age 40 or 50 we'll all have very different (hopefully much wiser) understandings..

 

[_TAO_]

I'm glad to see someone else here shares my thoughts....I just made a post about rethinking/escaping alpha male theory because I'm beginning to see how it's damaging my psyche, especially regarding the "shutting everyone out" that you mentioned. And I'm pretty sure I am guilty of causing a "love-hate" relationship with my LTR...****. I highly recommend giving the article a read.

thread with the article -----> http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=186906

 

[Boilermaker]

wow ... how did I miss this ?

Very true. I agree with it completely. As you say, true Juanning must be a deepr philosophy, much more than mere hacks and tricks ..

Thanks for sharing this. I have been reflecting on similar lines lately.

 

[zekko]

Squirrels, this is the kind of post that keeps me coming back to Sosuave.
Solid advice on improving yourself and becoming a better man.
Not a bunch of misogyny, negativity, and bitterness.

 

[The_411]

wow ... how did I miss this ?

Very true. I agree with it completely. As you say, true Juanning must be a deepr philosophy, much more than mere hacks and tricks ..

Thanks for sharing this. I have been reflecting on similar lines lately.

True Juanning is deeper than tricks and hacks. It's an essence of one's soul. Mind you that PUA =! Don Juan.

A true Don Juan is a lover of all things and embraces the beauty of the world and his joy permeates others. His presence conjures up desire.

It boils down to bringing passion and energizing people.

It's when you can take the tenets and adjust them and mold them to your personality that one is able to really shine with the women.

 

[om1xr]

This is gold!

 

[Epimanes]

I agree with this OP. Good post. I combine some tools from here and stuff I learned at marriage builders.com and both have helped greatly. Marriage builders helped because it offeres advice that benifits both people simultaneously and sosuave because I needed to up my game a bit as a man with my wife.

Be yourself.. Find out what's missing in your own game and apply it to your scenerio. There is no cookie cutter approach to anything. Nothing is black and white. Strenghthen your weaknesses and be the best man you can. The only person you can control is you so make the best of it.

Epi

 

[Scormus]

Squirrels - what do you do in my thread "brushed off by main plate"?

Do you go ghost and make her anxious, respond as slowly as her e.g. 1 week, or respond slow but not as slow as her, e.g. tomorrow which would be day 4.

 

[TheCWord]

This should be pinned at the top of all the forums, right next to the DJ bible. A sort of disclaimer.

I'm actually dead serious. Mods?

 

[cordoncordon]

Just an FYI, squirrels made this thread 3 years ago. He has been MIA for quite some time now.

 

[The Duke]

Great advice Mr. Squirrels. We've all fought this battle at some point. My ltr girl reminds me of this from time to time.

 

[abe0]

Just an FYI, squirrels made this thread 3 years ago. He has been MIA for quite some time now.

Maybe after his epiphany he is now a happily married man with two children and a gorgeous wife who loves him...respects him...and tends to all his needs. Way to go squirrel!!!!!

 

[777is21]

"Maybe after his epiphany he is now a happily married man with two children and a gorgeous wife who loves him...respects him...and tends to all his needs. Way to go squirrel!!!!!"
In response to this statement someone made- Yes- we are happily married and he has told me to no end how embarrased he is of ever taking part of this rediculous masogonistic site.(Think about it, if you have to take the advice of people you dont know who prolly dont know anything themselves, then wouldnt it be better to make your own mistakes and learn from them than listen to what someone else is making up and dispensing at YOUR expense? this place is a joke- take it from a hot, succesfeul woman who has always had her pick- and I picked squirells, who knows as much about women as 99% of you do about brain surgery, LOL... The fake person he was on here is nothing like the man I married. All you guys who want to get women do yourselves a favor and get off the computer and get a real life not hiding behind a computer, askig others hiding behind a computer for advice. maybe then you can find some happiness....Most of these people on here dipensing advice may as well be virgins, dont be fooled, this place will only make a lonely disillusined fool of you......the fact that he has never been back to this ses pool speaks volumes- peace

 

[Colossus]

Lol. He shouldn't have pulled you out of 6th grade so soon....you still need a few more years of spelling.

 

[Vulpine]

I, like many others, have benefitted greatly from this site. However, I know to take what I need and leave the rest. Consider douchebags you've been with, then consider MEN you've been with. This place can make the difference, if you leave the garbage and keep the gold.

I dare say squirrels took EXACTLY the gold he needed away from the site and is sharing it with you right now. He knows the difference between what he needed and what he didn't need. Follow? Yes, there is crap here. But, there are many "men's health" ideas that are very helpful to be exposed to. Many boys these days have a void in the "positive masculine role model" area. This place fills that void.

I dare you to go to any other "men's health" website and not find some garbage. You should go tell squirrels, whom I respect greatly, to never apologize for making himself better. After all, you weren't with squirrels before he found this place, were you? Be glad he isn't a douchebag (because he was here). You, in all likelihood, would not be with him if he hadn't took good things away from here.
:flowers:

Say "Hi" to squirrels for us, he was a positive masculine influence here. People are still hoping he's doing well.
:cheer:


By the way...

this place is a joke- take it from a hot, succesfeul woman who has always had her pick- and I picked squirells, who knows as much about women as 99% of you do about brain surgery, LOL...

Actions, not words.
"LOL..."? "He's got a "hot, succesfeul [sic] woman"? He must know something, otherwise he'd be with a dumpy harpy that emasculates him to the public.

Shame on you, 777is21. You should hold your husband with higher regard.

 

[Ruleit]

this place is a joke- take it from a hot, succesfeul woman who has always had her pick- and I picked squirells

Pics or GTFO.

embarrased ...
rediculous
masogonistic
prolly
succesfeul
squirells
dipensing
disillusined
ses pool

Send him my condolences. I married a hot, successful and EDUCATED woman who can spell.

who knows as much about women as 99% of you do about brain surgery,

Way to run down your man.

 

[sodbuster]

for sale: Google.... No longer needed, because my wife knows F'ing everything.... Hope he kept the Dictionary....

EVERY woman thinks she is smart, they tried to tell my son's they were smarter than they were in High School and got laughed at for their trouble. I suppose when you are going to be Valedictorian{one of my boys}, you know the truth....

My EX-WIFE thought she was smarter than I was too. EVEN in my Dental office. I put some cotton rolls in her mouth to check her bite, and told her to leave them in for 10 minutes. When I came back, they were laying on the tray. I told her,"I wanted those in" she said, "I thought" and I cut her off with "d@mn it, HERE I know more than you do"

 

[Tictac]

From the mouths of rodents, oft come gems.

 

[ChrisFloyd]

From the mouths of rodents, oft come gems.

Who are the rodents in this case?