Don't be good friends with women

wavejams007

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the other day, one of my good friends, who is a girl, started dating one of my other friends. neither wanted to acknowledge the other as BF/GF. Hence, they are F*ck buddies. They are both conservative, but she is way more naive. Trying to be the good friend, I told her of the concept of F*ckbuddies, as well as some other advice involving the future of their relationship. The result was, she won't talk to me now, and was highly "offended."

Moral of the story: women generally don't make good close friends, just lovers.
 
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You gave her the advice the wrong way. Your definitely going to talk to her in the future though, Fvckbuddies are agreed upon, otherwise it's viewed as being a slut. All PUAs can honestly say that treating the term as say plates, or as one of multiple long/short term relationships.
 

oakraiderz2

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Stackthestyles said:
You gave her the advice the wrong way. Your definitely going to talk to her in the future though, .
How did he give her advice in the wrong way??? He didnt say how he did it.
 

wavejams007

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NeonBase said:
I don't think it is wrong to be good friends with women.
Technically, there is nothing wrong with women as friends, but usually, it just doesn't work well. Yes, there are certain girls that make great friends, but they are not common.
 

Peace and Quiet

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oakraiderz2 said:
How did he give her advice in the wrong way??? He didnt say how he did it.
He didn't have to say how he did it, he just had to say what he said. After an AFC says "she said hi to me, what do I do", you assume he is asking the wrong question.

In the AFC case, it is a question he shouldn't have asked, it is a useless question. wavejams is in the same hand, he made a useless comment, a comment he shouldn't have made.

Who tells a girl that she is only a "fvck buddy"?

If one of your oldest friends picked up the bible and started preaching to you, the atheist, would you believe him, or would you avoid the topic?

The topic is whacked though, I really don't see the reason why somebody would give a girl "friend" advice about relationships after accusing them of having a FB relationship. Even accusing her of having a friends with benefits relationships would have been better.

If you want to shut me up, tell us how you "broke it to her"
 

Porky

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quit buying into this bullsh!t.

some women are b!tches, love drama, and make awful friends. maybe your female friend is an example of this.

but some guys are d-bags, love to ****block, and make awful friends.

are a lot of women b!tches? HELL yes. are a lot of guys d-bags? HELL yes. but saying "don't be good friends with women" is just fuggin stupid. be good friends with them if you're smart enough to know how to handle them.

if you're not, then take wavejams' advice.

by the way, what exactly did you say to her and how exactly did you present it?
 

akeith90

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I have many female friends. But we're not quite in the LJBF zone. Chick friends are great to have because they'll tell you what looks good on you and all that crap, what hair styles look better, etc. Plus there's the whole jealousy factor with other girls. And social proof.
Some I'm "best friends" with just because there's really no chance with them, and I don't want them, but they're good for advice like I said above. They'll give me the blunt truth, which is what I wanna hear. But the others, I keep it sexual with, making sure I don't get into the friend zone. I kino them, C&F, all that stuff.
They're like back-up in case I need anything haha.

I really dunno what yall are talkin about: Not having chick friends. Yah some of em can be b****s but just avoid them. You can tell pretty quick which ones are good and which are bad
 

wavejams007

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How is it going? You asked at the end of lunch I think it was something about was it a surprise or something about you and x, or something along that line until X came and the question got lost. If that was the question, then here is my answer, I thought you would be dating months ago. You two have so much in common. Plus, you two often go into your own world, X a little more than you, and it is hard to talk to you to a lot of the time. I think it is cool you two getting together, but my ex was talking to me, and she said she talked with you, and you say you and x aren't boyfriend/girlfriend, but are dating. I don't know if you are aware of what that is called sometimes, but it is, for lack of a better term, F*ckbuddies. Please, don't think I am perverted or something, but that is what that situation is called if you indeed are in it. Be aware, that borders on some unchristian behavior, and both of you are then available to date other people. Please don't view this as negative, just objective comments. A serious piece of advice, just live for the moment. Don't get too involved with x like you were with y, cuz in after your senior year, relationships end, and x, as well as me, z,w, and others will all fade from memory(sad but beleive me it is true). So just look to have fun. I am no way tryin to tell you what to do, just some advice.


I hope I am not stepping outta place, but just giving you an educated perspective on your somewhat immediate future.


I also want to say, if you had wanted to go to Jr/Sr with him instead of me, then I am sorry. I had fun with you, and made some good memories, although I feel bad for kinda ditching you at the bowling alley.

This is what I wrote. Straightforward. I go to a conservative, Christian school, and I know she wouldn't want this little title following her around. We are completely just friends.

Some might say I am tactless, but she had to learn sometime. I did try to be somewhat tactful.


Also, everybody keeps forgetting I said GENERALLY.
 
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BAMF

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It is very important when delivering information on what might be considered a touchy subject for the other party, that you say what you have to say in a confident and caring tone. After you said it if she was the least beit offended and she percived that you were the least bit unsure about what you just said, that that is where you problem lies. If women percive that you seem unsure about something you say they will often use it agains tyou and try to make you feel bad for what you said. So remeber the key is all in how you deliver the information. If you took all the advice above and she is still upset about what you said then she is jsut being stupid and you shouldnt worry about loosing a friend like that.
 
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man if thats what you said then shes just being a girl.. plain and simple. shes blowin stuff outa proportion. girls LOVE to do that. its some drama trip in their heads. and having gal friends is pretty damn awesome from my experience. not only do you look better to every other girl (cause it tells them that you know how to act around them-social proof.) but the hotter your gal friends are, the better you look socially to everyone else. plus girls live for drama so they make life interesting. honest to god most guys i know are funny and fun to be with, but we dont make 'drama' like girls do. yea sure its immature and annoying most of the time, but it makes life interesting. I agree completely with akeith90
and dude the only thing that makes sombody a 'fvck buddy' is if they are 'fvcking.' otherwise its completely normal to be dating and not officially bf/gf. dam man how else could you pull off going out with 7 girls at once without getting in trouble? :D :D
 
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I think you're being way to rash and impetious with your sudden advice. Sure, I agree that women are better off as lovers than friends but that doesnt mean you should befriend them either. Why? Networking my friend.

I made the dumb ass mistake more than once of totally pushing away and closing myself off to girls that I didnt create enough attraction in to do as I wish and so now I regret it because many of these girls I found attractive had a million other girls they knew in their social cirlce that were hot but now I can't exactly call Allie on the phone and asking her to hang out because I called her a "two faced coke head" in front of 150 ppl at a party..

anyways......
 

Ripass

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Girls make great friends... just dont give them advice.. they wont listen anyway.
 
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I don't agree with being good friends with HBs. Well if your a total AFC and want to get into her pants then being friends isn't the way to go. BUT having a HB as a friend will help because you can learn a lot. First of all you'll start getting used to talking to HBs and learn how to converse. Secondly they can introduce you to her other HOT friends so you don't have to do any work. Thirdly she can give you tips on your looks and clothing style! This will all help you by increasing confidence and stuff, I have about 4 HBs as friends and they helped me a lot. I don't care that I'm not doing anything with them cuz there's SO MANY other HBs.
 

TheVirtualMind

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Wait wait wait...Why were you saying that in the first place James? I sense a hint of trying to c0ckblock here. I mean, let's look at these facts:

- James is a guy

- This girl is a girl

- You were "trying to be a good friend" why?

- She is getting railed by one of your other ''friends"

- You took it upon yourself to "talk to her about it"

Come on man. Just admit you like her and you think she'd be better off dating you instead. I mean, it is written all over your "advice" to her anyway.
 

Krak

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/agree with original poster

Another thing, it's probably not best to give women advice even if you are just friends with them. If they ask for advice, by all means express your opinion but if they don't ask, don't tell.
 
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