The rapid proliferation of “It’s good to be a jerk” dictums seems to have led to a worldwide consensus that a Jerk IS the ideal masculine archetype. I don’t have a problem with guys acting like jerks to get laid, jerks DO get to wet their lap rockets much more often than nice guys. What I DO want to point out however, is that being a jerk and being an Alpha Male is NOT the same thing. Personally, I have more sympathy for the jerk than the nice guy. The jerk is a corollary of a lifetime of feminine conditioning the same way the nice guy is. The fact that most men think that a jerk is a byproduct of masculinity just proves how deeply we have internalized our feminine modes of thought. Here’s an outline of the lives of most of the jerks I know in my own life,
Phase 1: Feminine Enlightenment
Growing up, they are constantly bombarded with feminine social conventions that condition them appropriately under the pseudonym “gentlemen.” They are taught to feel SHAME for their sexuality, and DENY their own masculine instincts. Their minds begin to harvest life-long social phobias, seeds of approach anxiety, homophobia, and the fear of being dis-liked.
Phase 2: The Dead Zone.
First approaches to women fail horribly. They are promptly placed in the “Friend Zone” and denied intimacy by 99% of their female acquaintances. The advice he gets to “fix” himself ruins his chances with women even more. “Be sensitive and emotional, tell a girl how you feel, don’t hide yourself,” etc etc. He is taught these things with the intention of turning him into an honest man, but he misinterprets the advice and takes it literally.
He is taught to “try harder” with women he likes. He thinks desperation is a sign of his love and devotion so he throws himself at girls to prove his worthiness. Sadly, his desperation and extreme bouts of Oneitis only further destroy his chances with women. His distorted understanding of women fatally reduces his chances to attract anything besides mosquitoes.
Phase 3: Renaissance
Before, he was able to justify his shortcomings with a callous rationalism. Now however, it is becoming increasingly more apparent that the problem is not just him. All the girls he has fallen for end up sleeping with jerks i e; guys that they claim they would "never sleep with."
He is baffled.
Why are women sleeping with men who degrade them but LJBFing all the nice guys? A horrible monstrosity is born – a brooding resentment for women that he will harbor for the rest of his life. And thus his journey to becoming a jerk begins. A rampant de-feminization of all his ideas, beliefs, and habits occurs. He puts up a ****y attitude instead of a sensitive one. He actively tries to degrade women to try and prove his masculinity.
Notice how his evolution never included getting OVER his fears or insecurities, only a masking of them. He realizes that women are attracted to confidence, not obsessive love, so he hides his desperation with different Don Juan techniques, an arrogant attitude, and ****y humor. He gets laid more now, so he thinks he’s finally become a “man.” He continues to bury his insecurities further and further under an acropolis of false attitudes and behaviors.
It seems ok right? He’s getting laid more often; no one can tell that he’s still desperate inside. Until of course, very specific situations that give us a glimpse into his truly meager personality. He backlashes vigorously against anyone who takes a swipe at his ego. The reason why he has a “big” ego is because he uses its size to conceal the fragility of it.
And the biggest give-away of them all: When he finally DOES find a girl that he likes and thinks to himself “this ones a keeper” an AVALANCHE of insecurities, phobias, vulnerabilities, pervasively consume him. And thus begins his “regression” back into an AFC. His jerkish behavior might have made him a master over women, but self-mastery was still aeons beyond him.
Three things I want you to keep in mind…
(a) He didn’t turn BACK into an AFC; he was an AFC all along; just in different forms. When you’re an Alpha Male, you’re an Alpha Male. You don’t fluctuate between Alpha and beta the same way men don’t fluctuate between male and female
(b) He was a PRODUCT of feminism the same way the nice guy was. He was turned into a jerk because of WOMEN.
(c) He was NEVER masculine, he was ANTI-FEMININE.
Phase 1: Feminine Enlightenment
Growing up, they are constantly bombarded with feminine social conventions that condition them appropriately under the pseudonym “gentlemen.” They are taught to feel SHAME for their sexuality, and DENY their own masculine instincts. Their minds begin to harvest life-long social phobias, seeds of approach anxiety, homophobia, and the fear of being dis-liked.
Phase 2: The Dead Zone.
First approaches to women fail horribly. They are promptly placed in the “Friend Zone” and denied intimacy by 99% of their female acquaintances. The advice he gets to “fix” himself ruins his chances with women even more. “Be sensitive and emotional, tell a girl how you feel, don’t hide yourself,” etc etc. He is taught these things with the intention of turning him into an honest man, but he misinterprets the advice and takes it literally.
He is taught to “try harder” with women he likes. He thinks desperation is a sign of his love and devotion so he throws himself at girls to prove his worthiness. Sadly, his desperation and extreme bouts of Oneitis only further destroy his chances with women. His distorted understanding of women fatally reduces his chances to attract anything besides mosquitoes.
Phase 3: Renaissance
Before, he was able to justify his shortcomings with a callous rationalism. Now however, it is becoming increasingly more apparent that the problem is not just him. All the girls he has fallen for end up sleeping with jerks i e; guys that they claim they would "never sleep with."
He is baffled.
Why are women sleeping with men who degrade them but LJBFing all the nice guys? A horrible monstrosity is born – a brooding resentment for women that he will harbor for the rest of his life. And thus his journey to becoming a jerk begins. A rampant de-feminization of all his ideas, beliefs, and habits occurs. He puts up a ****y attitude instead of a sensitive one. He actively tries to degrade women to try and prove his masculinity.
Notice how his evolution never included getting OVER his fears or insecurities, only a masking of them. He realizes that women are attracted to confidence, not obsessive love, so he hides his desperation with different Don Juan techniques, an arrogant attitude, and ****y humor. He gets laid more now, so he thinks he’s finally become a “man.” He continues to bury his insecurities further and further under an acropolis of false attitudes and behaviors.
It seems ok right? He’s getting laid more often; no one can tell that he’s still desperate inside. Until of course, very specific situations that give us a glimpse into his truly meager personality. He backlashes vigorously against anyone who takes a swipe at his ego. The reason why he has a “big” ego is because he uses its size to conceal the fragility of it.
And the biggest give-away of them all: When he finally DOES find a girl that he likes and thinks to himself “this ones a keeper” an AVALANCHE of insecurities, phobias, vulnerabilities, pervasively consume him. And thus begins his “regression” back into an AFC. His jerkish behavior might have made him a master over women, but self-mastery was still aeons beyond him.
Three things I want you to keep in mind…
(a) He didn’t turn BACK into an AFC; he was an AFC all along; just in different forms. When you’re an Alpha Male, you’re an Alpha Male. You don’t fluctuate between Alpha and beta the same way men don’t fluctuate between male and female
(b) He was a PRODUCT of feminism the same way the nice guy was. He was turned into a jerk because of WOMEN.
(c) He was NEVER masculine, he was ANTI-FEMININE.
