Don Juanita introducing herself

[LSO]

Hi there!

I've been a long time lurker on these forums, so I figured it'd be polite to step up and introduce myself before I go back to the lurking mode. I'm a woman, married to a guy who's definitely not an AFC but not a DJ, either. Our marriage is a bit more, um, open-minded than marriages usually are.

I got into this DJ and PUA stuff in 2004 or something but forgot it for a long while. At first I read it simply out of curiosity because I've never really understood women. I guess I have a male brain or something. For example, if I use a neutral nick online, I'm usually mistaken for a guy. I'm also studying CS in college and have more guy friends than girl friends because girls are just so damn hard to figure out. Fortunately, though, I don't look like a man.

Everything I've read and learned about attracting women seems to make sense. When I honestly look at how I feel and react to men, I must say the advice on SS is pretty spot on. My husband also confirms than when he was younger and listened to his sisters' dating advice, he failed miserably. But when he simply was himself and showed no interest in a girl, the girl basically chased him.

So, I'm here to simply lurk and learn more about my own sex, but I'm also using the advice to "pick up" girls - both for friends only and some hot action (It seems quite a few straight girls don't mind getting some bi action). I'm also trying to teach my hubby how to do so. Like I said, we're in a sort of an open marriage, and the problem is, I can get more guys than he can get girls, so I wanna help him out. I'm not sure but I don't think many men have a wife who helps them pick up girls.

First and foremost, I see DJ'ing as a way of improving myself. Just reading this forum and the SS site have helped me become more social, make more friends/FB's, and improve my social skills, both with men and women. My problem is, I'm pretty introverted, and prefer deep 1-on-1 conversations to mindless small talk. It's all fine and dandy but I'm afraid I'm too serious and boring sometimes, so I've just learned to chill and be more fun. I've also learned to be more outgoing, approach strangers, smile at them, make friends with them, and so on.

Yeah, I'll shut up for now. Y'all probably think I'm a weirdo (or a troll) but it's ok, I'm proud to be weird. Also, I'm happy to meet you guys!

 

[DonJuanit0]

Yeah, you are weird about your marriage! Rather than that I find everything logical! You are not the only woman here and sometimes a woman's opinion might not be bad! Have a nice stay and maybe you should get your husband to read these staff too!

 

[BigWillyStyle]

You're written English is too good for a second language...

Anyway, a chick's opinion holds sway with me.

 

[mustfirstregister]

I'm a woman sometimes. So if u wanna pick me up feel free to do so. We can exchange naked pics if you want.

 

[tebow1120]

Not to judge you but whats the point of being married if your gonna sleep with other people.You might as well be single.But on another note I have noticed lately that women hate needy man,they love guys who treat them like crap and doesn't ever have time for them.

 

[Veridin]

You're written English is too good for a second language...

Anyway, a chick's opinion holds sway with me.

"You're written English"? Your written English is too bad for a first language.

English is my second language. I can beat most Americans and British in written English. It's a matter of ... quality, in a person.

 

[Veridin]

At first I read it simply out of curiosity because I've never really understood women. I guess I have a male brain or something. For example, if I use a neutral nick online, I'm usually mistaken for a guy. I'm also studying CS in college and have more guy friends than girl friends because girls are just so damn hard to figure out. Fortunately, though, I don't look like a man.

I have known several girls who prefer to hang around guys, because they don't like the status games girls play. These girls are usually much easier to spend time with. I had an ex who was like that.

Roligt att se någon här från Suomi. Hur är vädret där borta, varmt och soligt?

 

[tebow1120]

Most women who have all guy friends are the worst kind a women,there usually to rough and they will kick a guy to the curb real quick.Those are the girls you gotta look out for I have noticed.

 

[Veridin]

Most women who have all guy friends are the worst kind a women,there usually to rough and they will kick a guy to the curb real quick.Those are the girls you gotta look out for I have noticed.

Nope. Most of them are girls who opt out of the shallowness and the hard attitudes in the girl gang.

 

[DonGorgon]

Plain and simple she is a freak..lol i would not have married her but if her husband is happy and it works for him then great.. open marriage??? what is the point?? As long as you too have no kids i think its all good but raising healthy kids in an open marriage is probably not gona happen...

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Hahaha I think I'd pull my head through a wall if my wife started talking about sleeping with other guys AND girls.

I'm assuming you have control over the relationship? If your husband isn't the Don Juan type or is KINDA shy and has AFC qualities, he's not leading anything.

Aside from that, welcome!

 

[justinsane]

Hi there!

I've been a long time lurker on these forums, so I figured it'd be polite to step up and introduce myself before I go back to the lurking mode. I'm a woman, married to a guy who's definitely not an AFC but not a DJ, either. Our marriage is a bit more, um, open-minded than marriages usually are.

I got into this DJ and PUA stuff in 2004 or something but forgot it for a long while. At first I read it simply out of curiosity because I've never really understood women. I guess I have a male brain or something. For example, if I use a neutral nick online, I'm usually mistaken for a guy. I'm also studying CS in college and have more guy friends than girl friends because girls are just so damn hard to figure out. Fortunately, though, I don't look like a man.

Everything I've read and learned about attracting women seems to make sense. When I honestly look at how I feel and react to men, I must say the advice on SS is pretty spot on. My husband also confirms than when he was younger and listened to his sisters' dating advice, he failed miserably. But when he simply was himself and showed no interest in a girl, the girl basically chased him.

So, I'm here to simply lurk and learn more about my own sex, but I'm also using the advice to "pick up" girls - both for friends only and some hot action (It seems quite a few straight girls don't mind getting some bi action). I'm also trying to teach my hubby how to do so. Like I said, we're in a sort of an open marriage, and the problem is, I can get more guys than he can get girls, so I wanna help him out. I'm not sure but I don't think many men have a wife who helps them pick up girls.

First and foremost, I see DJ'ing as a way of improving myself. Just reading this forum and the SS site have helped me become more social, make more friends/FB's, and improve my social skills, both with men and women. My problem is, I'm pretty introverted, and prefer deep 1-on-1 conversations to mindless small talk. It's all fine and dandy but I'm afraid I'm too serious and boring sometimes, so I've just learned to chill and be more fun. I've also learned to be more outgoing, approach strangers, smile at them, make friends with them, and so on.

Yeah, I'll shut up for now. Y'all probably think I'm a weirdo (or a troll) but it's ok, I'm proud to be weird. Also, I'm happy to meet you guys!

WOW! Do you have any other sisters or cousins who are 36-24-36? tell them to drop me an email!

 

[dalynxx]

Nice to meet you LSO. You had a better reception on here than I had! I'm a female too by the way. Nice to see you here and your hubby is a lucky one!

 

[Relations]

Like I said, we're in a sort of an open marriage, and the problem is, I can get more guys than he can get girls, so I wanna help him out.

And this is why we love Euro chicks. Enjoy your time here!

 

[BigWillyStyle]

"You're written English"? Your written English is too bad for a first language.

Ohh, jeez, you got me; it should have been the possessive "your". Well done, idiot. I'm glad there are fvckin' tools like you to point out the obvious. But considering I was drunk when I wrote that initial post, I can get away with it. So get ****ed, Swedish faggot.

 

[LSO]

Thank you for your comments, everyone!

I'll address the marriage issue first. It's funny you guys are asking about it, while there are many threads on this forum where people are asking for tips on how to cheat on their girlfriends without getting caught or how to get into the pants of a girl who has a boyfriend. (Yes, yes, I've also seen people here who wouldn't cheat on their gf and advise people to not have a wife or gf if they can't commit. But still.)

"Why marry if you're gonna sleep with other people?" Guys, are you mixing love, sex and marriage with each other here? Sex is sex, love is love, and marriage is a useful legal contract between two people who want to spend the rest of their lives together.

Both my husband an I are seeing sex as an enjoyable physical activity, but that's it. Sex has simply become a bigger deal than it really is, especially these days when sex doesn't automatically mean babies.

Love is a different thing. I've never loved anyone like I love my hubby, and I know for sure he's never loved anyone like he loves me. He's my best friend, my favorite lover, a fantastic roommate, and the most important person in the world for me. It's nice to fck other people sometimes but I wouldn't want to share my life with anyone else. You can talk about a terminal case of one-itis here if you wish.

First and foremost, marriage is a useful legal contract that gives us a certain social status and certain legal benefits. Of course, it's also a way to say each other, "I love you and want to stay with you for the rest of my life", but then again, you can commit to each other without any legal papers. We're married because we plan to spend the rest of our lives together and we want the legal benefits associated with it.

Let's be real, here. Monogamy is hard for us human beings. So many people, both men and women, cheat on their spouse. Why promise each other to not have sex with anyone else, then go on and do it anyway, and lie to your spouse about it? Like Tiger Woods? Why cheat and lie to the person you're supposed to love? If you can't stay in a monogamous relationship, why pretend to be in one?

My hubby and I are fine with having sex with other people, but we do have a concept of cheating in our marriage. To us, "cheating" means becoming emotionally too attached to someone else. For example, if I fell in love with a fck buddy and considered him my best friend and the most trusted person in this world instead of my hubby, I would totally be cheating on him. And he'd be cheating on me if he loved some other woman more than he loves me.

I hope you got the idea. For us, love and sex aren't the same thing.

"You're written English"? Your written English is too bad for a first language.

I've seen many native English speakers, especially Americans, raping their native language so horribly I sometimes wonder if people are dyslexic or something. Homonym errors like this are my biggest peeve - people are mixing "you're" and "your" or "there", "their" and "they're" all the time. This is an error especially the native English speakers make. Why? Because they're pronounced the same way?

Ok BigWillyStyle, you were drunk. Explanation accepted. But you're not the only one writing like that, and I suspect so many people out there can't be drunk all the time. Or... who knows...

I guess people who speak English as their second language tend to be the most horrible grammar Nazis out there. When it comes to my native language, I confess I sometimes write horrible Finnish myself. It's my first language and I know I can cut some slack. So yes, I'm guilty of it, too.

Roligt att se någon här från Suomi. Hur är vädret där borta, varmt och soligt?

Tack, det är också roligt att se någon från Sverige. Men förstås är det soligt och jättevarmt här I Finland! Det är alltid så varmt här... Not. My Swedish sucks, though, since it's my third language. Jag snackar bara finska och engelska.

 

[LSO]

So get ****ed, Swedish faggot.

We Finns are convinced 99% of Swedes are gays. Swedish fag jokes are very popular here.

 

[rocksoff]

Still.......any dude can fvck you so there is no love between you guys, you guys are just friends with a fvcking contract

 

[SharinganUser]

Isn't open marriage a contradiction?

 

[ThatMysteriousGuy]

Thank you for your comments, everyone!

I'll address the marriage issue first. It's funny you guys are asking about it, while there are many threads on this forum where people are asking for tips on how to cheat on their girlfriends without getting caught or how to get into the pants of a girl who has a boyfriend. (Yes, yes, I've also seen people here who wouldn't cheat on their gf and advise people to not have a wife or gf if they can't commit. But still.)

It's mostly because, at least here in USA culture, successfully cheating (temporarily!) impresses the friends of the person cheating.

"Why marry if you're gonna sleep with other people?" Guys, are you mixing love, sex and marriage with each other here? Sex is sex, love is love, and marriage is a useful legal contract between two people who want to spend the rest of their lives together.

Both my husband an I are seeing sex as an enjoyable physical activity, but that's it. Sex has simply become a bigger deal than it really is, especially these days when sex doesn't automatically mean babies.

EXACTLY! The ballgame has changed. Women's fears until recently were primarily Pregnancy, STDs, and fear of loss...now it's down to the last two for the most part. (other stuff too, but those are "biggies")

{snip}

My hubby and I are fine with having sex with other people, but we do have a concept of cheating in our marriage. To us, "cheating" means becoming emotionally too attached to someone else. For example, if I fell in love with a fck buddy and considered him my best friend and the most trusted person in this world instead of my hubby, I would totally be cheating on him. And he'd be cheating on me if he loved some other woman more than he loves me.

I hope you got the idea. For us, love and sex aren't the same thing.

In USA english, people far too often consider "cheating" and "betrayal" to mean exactly the same thing. They're very different. Cheating is hiding other sexual encounters, betrayal is more deep and about "trading in" a woman emotionally in his mind for one he feels more deeply about. (That's a very loose translation).

Many women don't have a problem with a guy sleeping with other women, but the instant he starts acting AFC or keeps talking about the girls it turns into betrayal.

I'm monogamous for the most part but I still follow a personal rule to not mention other women in any way unless it's necessary. Most women I have known tend to not like a guy saying something like "i heard the greatest joke from a girl at the gas station yesterday" when the guy/girl are lying together on the couch watching a movie.

Some women differ, but it's better safe than sorry unless the woman encourages and/or gets hot talking about other women.

I've seen many native English speakers, especially Americans, raping their native language so horribly I sometimes wonder if people are dyslexic or something. Homonym errors like this are my biggest peeve - people are mixing "you're" and "your" or "there", "their" and "they're" all the time. This is an error especially the native English speakers make. Why? Because they're pronounced the same way?

A friend I recently made is a guy who just emigrated from the Netherlands and married a USA girl he met while she was visiting there. He asked my why people were sort of standoffish very quickly with him and I explained it was in part due to his precise English. He has a great command of the English language and knows how to use contractions properly. The thing is that he sounds pompish and sort of "gay" because he's not using colloquialisms and his sentences are completely grammatically correct....unlike mine being the USA English slacker that I am. I had to add that he has a quality that's rare and annoys people: when he's told something as fact he'll ask "why do you believe that?" or something similar. That's annoying to people who aren't critical thinkers and realize they don't know why they believe {whatever} to be true. I think it's great.

Those who have English as a second language are almost always more likely to know how to use contractions properly. In the USA, contractions are taught early but we focus mostly on passing standardized tests that ignore correct contraction use so it isn't very important. Using contractions improperly doesn't impact school funding and such so it's not a big deal here.


I't bu'gs the' ****' ou't of me and inter'rupts the' fl'ow wh'en I'm reading so I' oft'en post th'is im'age:
http://www.zaiusnation.com/stuff/zaius/moosic2/bobsqu.gif
{snip other stuff}