Don’t be so afraid of the friend zone..

[Lynx nkaf]

This is sarcastic-funny meme but I wonder if women want courtship more? (who even uses that word?)
translate: yes she wants to and intends to fvck you and yes she thinks you're dominant/alpha /whatever but just needs buildup of anticipatory foreplay(multple dates or weeks)
I think its a gray area noone wants to talk about in redpill parlance.
Its like it doesn't exist.
Why would such a sarcastic meme be created?

You can be friends with women; you just have to know what you are doing.

1. If you're the type of guy that has hooked up with female "friends" before and/or was able to successfully meet other women that way, great.

2. If you're the type of guy who generally doesn't get to hook up with female friends, you can still be around them as practice as long as you know the deal and aren't delusional about it.

It's only really a problem for guys that are secretly hoping to hook up with chicks that they realistically have no chance with.

Now I respect the point that some make about, "A guy shouldn't be around women in a non-sexual way." But if if a guy has NO women that he's interacting with and is in a dry spell, he may need to start somewhere. It's at least a progression from "Creep Zone" where no female wants to go near him to "Friend Zone" where they aren't attracted but not running for the door either lol.

 

[SW15]

People are stupid. They confuse what is normal vs what is natural. In 2020, it is normal to use dating apps and forgo a vibrant social life. But it is not natural.

It is natural to exist in tribes. This is how humans have been meeting and mating for hundreds of thousands of years before tinder was ever invented. Before the concept of bars were ever invented.

As a society, we are becoming more and more unnatural. And that is why we struggle to connect.

This is why I always preach finding social environments based on your hobbies and passions that have women in it.

It is 1000% easier to find women on your wavelength that are emotionally/sexually available in these tribal environments.

That's because this is the way NATURE intended it to be.

I may be like a 7/10. I show up to one of these environments and I already have 3-4 legit options. Meanwhile I can swipe until I die and find no compatible women.

Failure to exist in social tribes is your own damn fault. It goes against nature and will lead to nothing but frustration.

Good tribal environments are getting more difficult to find, even in big U.S. cities.

Even in some female friendly hobbies, it can still be a challenge to meet women in these environments. It's still better than swipe apps if it can be done.

That’s kinda weird dude.. some chicks have more to offer than vajayjay, I know some chicks are genuinely funny good people ..

I have immense focus. I need vagina before I can evaluate anything else. I've discovered some genuinely good women as I've been slamming their pusssies.

 

[SW15]

View attachment 4313

Fucck that! GTF off the apps if that is the case. The cold approach environment is not much better and finding new social environments is also going to be a challenge in the pandemic era.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Fucck that! GTF off the apps if that is the case. The cold approach environment is not much better and finding new social environments is also going to be a challenge in the pandemic era.

Maybe they should actually use the word 'Fuvking' apps in the title page of the app to slap these girls into reality. "Girls, the men don't think this is a 'dating' app, they think it is a 'fuvking' app."

I don't know or have the answer. What apps do girls use that want to date?

 

[harrison9876]

I disagree with this. You seriously can’t just have a female friend who’s cool and not want to bang her?

In all male/female friendships there is always a mutual attraction...I am not saying a mutual SEXUAL attraction, but an attraction nonetheless. Otherwise you would not be friends at all. This attraction can always lead to sex, given the circumstances.

Sure, I can be friends with a girl who is cool and NOT want to bang...but my time invested in that friendship is minor...VERY minor.

Though I am in a MAJOR dry spell right now...my most successful times were when I was friends, C&F, flirty with ALL women, regardless of my interest. I treated all of them the same...and did not pursue any of them. Though I was not interested in most of them...I would have banged all of them in a heartbeart.

My ONLY girl "friends" are:

1) exes from previous hook-up or relationship.
2) girls who have boyfriends who I would maybe want to bang in the future.
3) girls who are single who I would maybe want to bang in the future.

It is not a "I will only be friends with a girl if I want to fvck her"...it comes down to attraction. We are FRIENDS becasue there is some sort of attraction there.

 

[zekko]

What they mean is they don’t want to be your girl, doesn’t mean they won’t sleep with you. So just be chill, and go with their flow sometimes ..

Completely agree. Acting butthurt doesn't accomplish anything. Sometimes the girl is not in the right place in her life, or she doesn't know you that well, and sometimes she has to go home and wonder about you a little first. A lot of this PUA advice is for picking up a girl for a lay that same night. If a girl friendzones you, you're probably not going to be banging her in the restroom five minutes later, which is what a lot of PUA advice is geared toward.

 

[Mike32ct]

This is sarcastic-funny meme but I wonder if women want courtship more? (who even uses that word?)
translate: yes she wants to and intends to fvck you and yes she thinks you're dominant/alpha /whatever but just needs buildup of anticipatory foreplay(multple dates or weeks)
I think its a gray area noone wants to talk about in redpill parlance.
Its like it doesn't exist.
Why would such a sarcastic meme be created?

Yeah, nobody uses the term "courtship" anymore. That is super blue-pilled stuff.

The reason that "build up over time" isn't talked about is because it hits a sore spot in the red and black pilled communities. If she makes the guy "wait", then there is a possibility that it is a beta-bux or long-term provider situation. I'm not saying that is always the case, but it definitely can be. Then the guy thinks, "Why I am not attractive enough to be the guy that she DOESN'T make wait?"

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Yeah, nobody uses the term "courtship" anymore. That is super blue-pilled stuff.

The reason that "build up over time" isn't talked about is because it hits a sore spot in the red and black pilled communities. If she makes the guy "wait", then there is a possibility that it is a beta-bux or long-term provider situation. I'm not saying that is always the case, but it definitely can be. Then the guy thinks, "Why I am not attractive enough to be the guy that she DOESN'T make wait?"

assuming, assuming..... she probably 'makes' them all wait. How can you tell a woman is such and such by looking at a yearbook photo(app profile pic)?

Not as planned and devious as all that.

Mike, it just seems like a spoiled brat kind of attitude. "you won't fuvk me first date?" "fine, I accuse you of this, this and this"(insert redpill/bluepill terms)

not you, Mike spoiled brat, just 2020 society

 

[Mike32ct]

assuming, assuming..... she probably 'makes' them all wait. How can you tell a woman is such and such by looking at a yearbook photo(app profile pic)?

Not as planned and devious as all that.

Mike, it just seems like a spoiled brat kind of attitude. "you won't fuvk me first date?" "fine, I accuse you of this, this and this"(insert redpill/bluepill terms)

Yeah I don't disagree. It doesn't bother me (personally) that much. I never had a first DATE lay. Same night lay from a bar or club in the past, yes, but that's a different animal.

It is also true that in romance novels (which almost always have a shirtless Chad on the cover), she doesn't necessarily sleep with him right away. There is some "build up" in the story. While it is fiction, there may be some truth to her (sometimes) finding it hotter if it doesn't happen instantly.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Yeah I don't disagree. It doesn't bother me (personally) that much. I never had a first DATE lay. Same night lay from a bar or club in the past, yes, but that's a different animal.

It is also true that in romance novels (which almost always have a shirtless Chad on the cover), she doesn't necessarily sleep with him right away. There is some "build up" in the story. While it is fiction, there may be some truth to her (sometimes) finding it hotter if it doesn't happen instantly.

And hey, I don't disagree that men can be escalating sooner.
But just cuz they don't get to the 100%(same/first date lay) doesn't mean that at 65% she won't still like you, want you. Goes deeper than ASD.

I think when women use NAWALT they really are trying to say "I'm a 65% first date girl, not 100% first date girl like you had last time. I am a different critter than the last one dammit"
Or something like that.
or the opposite, "I'm a 100% girl not like the 65% you had last time(first date lay/sexual escalation level). I am a different critter than the last one dammit"

 

[Robert28]

I guess it would be easier to handle the friendzone if you got that after one date. To me that’s not what the friendzone is. What’s happened to me is they wait until you’ve somewhat invested in them after 5-7 dates, the girl has been INTENSE getting to know you over the course of say a month or so. You think things are going well and then BAM, you get “I just want to be friends”. So you try to pull back and accept it but here she comes guns blazing, basically saying with her actions “hold on there Mr. New Friendzone victim, I ain’t done with you yet! I’m gonna use your emotions against you while you still like me. Meanwhile, I’ve gotten over your ass in 2 days. I’m gonna text you like when I liked you, I’m gonna recommend we hangout. Give you time to take a step back and get over ME? The hell you say!”. And the poor bastard is led into the friendzone for God knows how long. That, my friends, is the friendzone. Not this go on one date and you text them once a week after you get the ljbf speech. No, that’s just regular friends.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

I guess it would be easier to handle the friendzone if you got that after one date. To me that’s not what the friendzone is. What’s happened to me is they wait until you’ve somewhat invested in them after 5-7 dates, the girl has been INTENSE getting to know you over the course of say a month or so. You think things are going well and then BAM, you get “I just want to be friends”. So you try to pull back and accept it but here she comes guns blazing, basically saying with her actions “hold on there Mr. New Friendzone victim, I ain’t done with you yet! I’m gonna use your emotions against you while you still like me. Meanwhile, I’ve gotten over your ass in 2 days. I’m gonna text you like when I liked you, I’m gonna recommend we hangout. Give you time to take a step back and get over ME? The hell you say!”. And the poor bastard is led into the friendzone for God knows how long. That, my friends, is the friendzone. Not this go on one date and you text them once a week after you get the ljbf speech. No, that’s just regular friends.

what's your escalation game look like timing-wise?

 

[Robert28]

what's your escalation game look like timing-wise?

Escalation was probably the reason but one of them we slept together the second date and every date after that. What I’ve noticed is both girls had just come out of year long relationships and I was a short term rebound. But they got to know me so they wanted to keep me around.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Escalation was probably the reason but one of them we slept together the second date and every date after that. What I’ve noticed is both girls had just come out of year long relationships and I was a short term rebound. But they got to know me so they wanted to keep me around.

you sound successful man.
What do you think of the idea that relationships have an expiry date?

Could it just have been a coincidence that both these relationships 'expired' kind of early on?

Are you an easy guy to say no to?
I ask because sometimes the girl will try to let a guy down gently because she's afraid he knows too much personal stuff about her life now to just go cold turkey. Really she's hoping you'll move on immediately and forgive her for the early expiry date of the relationship.
Maybe investigate the platespinning idea on purpose to see if there's a chance your abundance can extend expiry dates.
I had the impression before and still do that you're a good guy who actually wants serious ltr's.
Seems counter-intuitive to spin plates but that's just to push back the expiry date of the next relationship.
Something's gotta change.

 

[Robert28]

you sound successful man.
What do you think of the idea that relationships have an expiry date?

Could it just have been a coincidence that both these relationships 'expired' kind of early on?

Are you an easy guy to say no to?
I ask because sometimes the girl will try to let a guy down gently because she's afraid he knows too much personal stuff about her life now to just go cold turkey. Really she's hoping you'll move on immediately and forgive her for the early expiry date of the relationship.
Maybe investigate the platespinning idea on purpose to see if there's a chance your abundance can extend expiry dates.
I had the impression before and still do that you're a good guy who actually wants serious ltr's.
Seems counter-intuitive to spin plates but that's just to push back the expiry date of the next relationship.
Something's gotta change.

Well both “relationships” followed the same pattern. Both girls came on STRONG and FAST. That’s why I said both of them were INTENSE in getting to know me. You basically couldn’t slow it down, I did the 80/20 rule with texting, I even tried to turn down dates in the beginning because I knew seeing them too much would kill the mystery about me. But they HAD to see me and I ran out of reasons not to see them. I like to see a girl once a week in the beginning, then gradually work up to twice a week and so on. Not these girls. They had to see you every 3 days AND they had to text you ALL the time. I’d ignore best I could but it wasn’t working. Basically any boundaries I tried to set during the beginning were being run through. The spark was there but it was so much so soon that I knew it wasn’t sustainable on their part. That’s why neither of them lasted past a month of dating before I got friendzoned. I was doing everything I could to not be too available but it still wasn’t enough. Every relationship I had that was long term didn’t start out like these. It was gradual and could grow. These went from 0-100 mph in two weeks. They even brought up the “we are dating” and I’m thinking “holy crap! After 2 weeks?”. That’s why I laugh when people say “let the girl bring up what you are”. Yeah, that can backfire.lol

 

[Lynx nkaf]

Well both “relationships” followed the same pattern. Both girls came on STRONG and FAST. That’s why I said both of them were INTENSE in getting to know me. You basically couldn’t slow it down, I did the 80/20 rule with texting, I even tried to turn down dates in the beginning because I knew seeing them too much would kill the mystery about me. But they HAD to see me and I ran out of reasons not to see them. I like to see a girl once a week in the beginning, then gradually work up to twice a week and so on. Not these girls. They had to see you every 3 days AND they had to text you ALL the time. I’d ignore best I could but it wasn’t working. Basically any boundaries I tried to set during the beginning were being run through. The spark was there but it was so much so soon that I knew it wasn’t sustainable on their part. That’s why neither of them lasted past a month of dating before I got friendzoned. I was doing everything I could to not be too available but it still wasn’t enough. Every relationship I had that was long term didn’t start out like these. It was gradual and could grow. These went from 0-100 mph in two weeks. They even brought up the “we are dating” and I’m thinking “holy crap! After 2 weeks?”. That’s why I laugh when people say “let the girl bring up what you are”. Yeah, that can backfire.lol

lol.
Weird how similar they were.
Maybe you're getting better in bed, not a bad problem to have to create this kind of scrambling to move fast relationship wise(them pressuring you).

Well.
They have to learn to comply with your boundaries.
How to train that into a woman?
Ever read Boundaries by Henry Cloud? I think he has some techniques in there to make anyone, any situation comply with your boundaries.
What does wikihow or youtube searches come up with making people comply with boundaries?

 

[Robert28]

lol.
Weird how similar they were.
Maybe you're getting better in bed, not a bad problem to have to create this kind of scrambling to move fast relationship wise(them pressuring you).

Well.
They have to learn to comply with your boundaries.
How to train that into a woman?
Ever read Boundaries by Henry Cloud? I think he has some techniques in there to make anyone, any situation comply with your boundaries.
What does wikihow or youtube searches come up with making people comply with boundaries?

I’ve learned that any woman that comes on strong now will leave just as fast too. How they can invest so much mentally into someone in such a short time and just end it is beyond me. But that’s how I’ve been friendzoned and they actually wanted to keep me around, it wasn’t meant as a blowoff to never talk to me again or see me again. I had to eventually put a stop to it, they weren’t going to. With some women it’s impossible to set boundaries or train them to do anything. They’re broken beyond repair so I’ve learned to just enjoy the short wild ride.

 

[Lynx nkaf]

hmm, even short wild rides are better than droughts.
Careful with the broken ones.

 

[Igetit!]

Sometimes I think "friendzone" needs to be CLEARLY defined.

I guess it would be easier to handle the friendzone if you got that after one date. To me that’s not what the friendzone is. What’s happened to me is they wait until you’ve somewhat invested in them after 5-7 dates, the girl has been INTENSE getting to know you over the course of say a month or so. You think things are going well and then BAM, you get “I just want to be friends”. So you try to pull back and accept it but here she comes guns blazing, basically saying with her actions “hold on there Mr. New Friendzone victim, I ain’t done with you yet! I’m gonna use your emotions against you while you still like me. Meanwhile, I’ve gotten over your ass in 2 days. I’m gonna text you like when I liked you, I’m gonna recommend we hangout. Give you time to take a step back and get over ME? The hell you say!”. And the poor bastard is led into the friendzone for God knows how long. That, my friends, is the friendzone. Not this go on one date and you text them once a week after you get the ljbf speech. No, that’s just regular friends.

This type of friendzone is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT from the type I used to encounter in my high school/early 20s........and I have a PHD in Friendzonology.

I was THE KING of the friendzone. King,president,governor,mayor,C.E.O......I was at the HEAD of the class.

NO ONE got friendzoned more than I did. It took me a few years to figure out what was going on,but I eventually cracked the code.

The type of friendzone I used to encounter........was where you talk to a girl you were interested in,but not ask her out out of fear of being rejected. So you just talked about whatever.......life,friends,music,family,news....whatever. Anything other than YOU and HER possibly going out.....and I'd do this for like weeks,in some cases months. We'd laugh,talk,joke,kid,play.....but I'd never show my interest. Then after doing that for weeks or months,when I'd finally muster up the courage to ask her out,I'd get.....

"I don't see you "that" way" or
"You're like a brother to me" or
"I don't like you "like that".

You know....the kind of friendzone where a chick sees you more as like one of her girlfriends,and not a MAN. To the point,she almost doesn't mind getting dressed/undressed in front of you cause she doesn't see you as a possible sexual threat.


With the type I describe,she really means it when she says she just wants to be friends,instead of just saying it hoping you will go away.

@Robert28: The chicks you spoke of may have gave you the friendzone speech after 5 to 7 dates,but at least you got to the dates.

With me,I had to listen to chicks talk about their dates with OTHER MEN,lol. How the date went,jealously listen to her as she squealed with delight,chemistry,and excitement over a guy,etc,etc. I would have killed to have your "type" of friendzone back then.


Oh well. Live and learn.

 

[cola]

I guess it would be easier to handle the friendzone if you got that after one date. To me that’s not what the friendzone is. What’s happened to me is they wait until you’ve somewhat invested in them after 5-7 dates, the girl has been INTENSE getting to know you over the course of say a month or so. You think things are going well and then BAM, you get “I just want to be friends”. So you try to pull back and accept it but here she comes guns blazing, basically saying with her actions “hold on there Mr. New Friendzone victim, I ain’t done with you yet! I’m gonna use your emotions against you while you still like me. Meanwhile, I’ve gotten over your ass in 2 days. I’m gonna text you like when I liked you, I’m gonna recommend we hangout. Give you time to take a step back and get over ME? The hell you say!”. And the poor bastard is led into the friendzone for God knows how long. That, my friends, is the friendzone. Not this go on one date and you text them once a week after you get the ljbf speech. No, that’s just regular friends.

The type of friend zone you just described should never happen to anyone familiar with the red pill.