Doing DJ Boot Camp

[kentgraham10]

I have been on a path of Self Improvement for ever a year now and when taking an honest assessment of myself, I have improved in a number of areas: Appearance (new wardrobe + hair style + strict workout schedule), mentality (generally positive, confident I can meet challenges head on and be successful), and knowledge (learned more this year not about my area of study, but just realizations about myself as well). One area I am still struggling with is in the social arena. I have made new friends and have grown more comfortable, but obviously I am still not where I want to be if I am still posting here haha.

I am taking the DJ challenge so I can get to the point where I can approach any girl I find attractive without hesitation. Now that school is just about over for the year and summer is about to start I feel like this is the perfect time to get into action. I have one week to make eye contact and approach 50 strangers with a hello. Can't wait to start!

 

[kentgraham10]

Not sure how often to update but here is day 1:

I decided instead of putting off and starting tomorrow, I would start today. I decided I would kill three birds with one stone. I wanted to get some serious cardio in today to trim off the fat in my belly area (5' 8'' 167 lbs, down from a high @ 172 a month ago) so I decided to go on the local nature trail and jog for about 45 minutes. Along the way I came across over 15 people and gave eye contact and said hello to each and surprisingly most responded positively.

I get bored with running kind of quickly so I decided to check out the basketball courts after my 45 minute jog. Unfortunately, they had about 5-6 people using the far end of the court, so I decided to just drive off and go home to play Xbox. Then I rethought my decision: this whole process is about putting yourself outside your comfort zone to tackle situations you would have otherwise avoided. So I manned up and went onto the court. Again, they were respectful and allowed me to play at my end of the court. I actually knew a few of the other guys from playing there the other day and soon more people I knew showed up. Although I'm not going to count it, I gave eye contact and said hello to that group as a whole and they returned the greeting.

I used to think I was born to be socially awkward, but I said the same thing about being forever skinny and out of shape. I see this process so far a lot like working out in that you have to stay committed and not expect drastic changes overnight. Surprisingly, significant changes did happen almost instantly today. I am excited to continuing the Boot Camp and look forward to reading how others are fairing as well!

 

[kentgraham10]

This week in cardio has worked wonders and I haven't even been eating that great. Down now to 165 after two intense cardio days this week. I plan on at least keeping that pace or adding in a third day but at this pace I will be where I want to be within a few weeks. Just going to have some fun today hanging out with a friend from HS I haven't seen in a while up at his college. Gonna pick up where I left off tomorrow.

 

[kentgraham10]

Double post

 

[kentgraham10]

Updating my last 2 days:

Day 3:

Started as a normal Friday, gym in the morning at 5am, got home by 8am, ate breakfast and worked on papers until about 1. Called one of my friends from high school I haven't hung out with for a while and made some plans to chill (ended up going to a party up at his college, more on that later). Went to Five Guys and Fries. I swear, last three times including this one I go there I end up seeing a really cute chick there and we make eye contact + smile with each other. Again, doing this boot camp because I never know what to do AFTER this point, but I got some good practice later that night. The chick there was a single mom though it looked like. Probably could have tried something, probably should have tried something, but sometimes it just feels good knowing the work I am doing towards my appearance, body language, and attitude is paying off.

At night I went to my friend's college to hang out a party he and his roommates were throwing up there. There were a lot of people I ran into, some I knew from before some I didn't and I was sociable and friendly to everyone. This is a setting I am starting to become a bit more comfortable in and found that most people are usually pretty friendly. Unfortunately there weren't many attractive girls at this party, until...

I had a few drinks lol. Not that the drinks made ugly girls attractive, but two happened to show up, one was a 5 at best and the other was a HB6. Believe me, on this night these were the best "single" chicks I had to work with (I have found I have pretty high standards when it comes to women because everyone else was hitting on anything with a vagina, but I digress). Once I saw the HB6 I just decided to go full out ****y + funny (jerk) on her. A lot of times it worked really well and she had that look on her face of "oh my god I can't believe he just said that" followed by laughing and smiling so I knew I was doing pretty good. For example, once she was talking about how she has a speech problem and I said "yeah I didn't want to mention anything but I kind of noticed that right away about you." She replied with a laughing, "whaa?" Once I went back to her dorm (was this an invite to f***? you probably need more details but quite frankly I can't really remember them ). Found out the dude in the picture I was making fun of was her boyfriend, so then I completely backed off and let my friend (who came too along with the 5) have at it. Not that I have a problem doing that because how am I the one breaking the sacred moral oath of a relationship when I'm not the boyfriend lol but my friend is really religious and I didn't want to do something to jeopardize that. He's a good dude though. Anyway, pretty awesome day here glad I got some practice for later in the boot camp. Probably up to about 25 hellos to strangers at this point.

Day 4:

Another day I was able to have some good fun. Went to see the re-release of Top Gun (an awesome movie to watch Tom Cruise doing ****y+funny routine + FIGHTER JETS!). Said hello to 3 strangers there + a short conversation with a guy who won a trivia contest before the movie and received Top Gun on Blue Ray. Thought today would be a good cardio day and decided to just play basketball. Played at a different court today (stretching comfort zones) and had eye contact + hello with at least 10 people, probably closer to 15 so splitting the difference to 13 for official count. That's about it for today running on about 15 hours sleep for the last 3 days so I want to get some good sleep tonight and tomorrow so I am fresh for finals + gym + getting my last 8 hellos.

So after 4 days: 42/50 hellos, at least 1 hr of eye contact has been surpassed long ago. Found eye contact has been pretty easy to do. Cardiowise, my scale says 160 but this has to be off so I am going to find out for sure from the gym monday. I'm guessing 163 at the lowest.

 

[kentgraham10]

Day 5:

Not much to add just finishing up work for this semester at college. One of the girls from Friday added me on facebook and wrote on my wall asking when we were hanging out again. Full on D-Bag = results. Good to know!

 

[kentgraham10]

Day 6 (Monday):

Not much to add other that I only have about 2-3 more hellos to get in. Oh, and my lack of an awesome hairstyle needs to be addressed!

 

[kentgraham10]

Day 6:

Ignore my other posts because today (Tuesday) is my actual day 6.

Had my first final today pretty sure I nailed it. Before it started I flirted with this girl that sat in front of me. We had friendly conversations in the past but today I just decided to go full steam ahead (stretching comfort zones) and we went back and forth and I wasn't ever uncomfortable it just felt natural. Looks wise a 6.5, personality 8, averages out to about a 7 for me. Have her email so it might be something worth pursuing maybe not.

Kept up with eye contact today felt I was slacking a little bit. Did some video games for the first time in almost a month and I didn't play more than 20 minutes before I got bored. Played basketball, went home, forced myself back out to finish some errands, and I don't know what it was but I was getting a lot of looks from women. Not really sure what sparked that maybe it was the shirt (fits me very good lol). Have to just get through a handful more hellos tomorrow and I'll be set for week 2.

 

[Packers2010]

nice thread man. inspired me to do my own. now that i got my **** together and am able to drive.


thanks.

 

[Htienvu]

Keep it up mate, I need to re-do DJ bootcamp again. Seeing others do it feels inspiring.

 

[kentgraham10]

Day 7:

Last day in the gym today for a few of the dudes I met this year at college so I did a little bit more talking than usual but I got squats done and a few leg and shoulder workouts so I'm content. Went home to take a nap, got back to campus around 12 to start preparing for the final. Knocked out my remaining hellos and strove to make eye contact a priority throughout the day. At the final a girl in my class started talking to me like she usually does and we got to the topic of final papers (she's way behind in work). She asks if I could write her papers for her and I tell her 100 bucks. She replies with something like, "isn't the fact I'm cute enough?" in a very overtly flirty way. I was thinking for one, you aren't really my type sorry (my friend on the other hand really finds her attractive so to each his own lol) and two I kind of realized she was swinging for the fences today so props to her, gets my respect. Not enough respect for a date, but I have a feeling she will try again tomorrow when we have our last final together.

Little side note, got a paper back today. Teacher points out in her comments that I had a great title. Flipped to the final page and got a 92 on it (I never ran into anyone who got an A on one of her papers). What I got out of it is great first impressions go a long way. Just something to keep in mind as I enter week 2.

And thanks for the reply guys! Quite a few people are just starting up if you want to get right in on it. Best thing I got out of it so far is challenging comfort zones every moment you can. The quicker you do that and the more often you challenge yourself, the sooner the changes will come. Already a week in and I'm walking with a swagger and have an attitude I just didn't have a week ago.

 

[kentgraham10]

Week 2, Day 1:

Thursday was a pretty fun day finished up some finals then had the whole afternoon freed up. Earlier in the morning I had my first conversation with a stranger at the gym, I'd put it at a few minutes. Seemed like a pretty cool dude too, probably see him in there more over the summer. Found out yesterday about a party happening Friday (today) so I'll update you all on how that goes tomorrow. I think I should be able to knock out another 3-4 convos just right there.

 

[kentgraham10]

Week 2, Days 2-4

Not much to report. Could have knocked this challenge out of the park on Friday night but instead of going to a club for the first time I instead hung out with some friends who were throwing a small party. Still had fun, but disappointed I didn't challenge my comfort zones. Saturday nothing much happened, today was mothers day so it was a family day.

With three days left I still need to knock out 8 out of 10 conversations, really digging myself into a hole here. Had one at 2am Saturday night with a dude when we were looking for mother's day cards at the super market but between that and my conversation at the gym I haven't really done much this week.

Since school is now over I feel I have more time to go full out on this. Three days left. The time is now!

 

[kentgraham10]

Week 2, Day 5:

Yeah it was only a day ago but honestly I can't really remember much what happened this day. I know I didn't make any progress on my week 2 exercise but I did carry over things from week one. Now when I walk past a person, sometimes I actually feel uncomfortable NOT saying hello. BIG difference from before I started this. Think my day went something like Gym -> hang out w/friend -> running -> basketball -> nba 2k11 @ someone's house from the courts. All and all a pretty solid day (first official day of summer too, can't complain weather was great.)

Week 2, Day 6:

Today was probably one of the best days I had in a long time. I woke up just knowing that I was not only going to get a lot accomplished today, but that I would have a blast doing it. Before I start that, I just want to remind myself here with a small checklist of what I want to address besides the DJ boot camp:

- Hairstyle (still not pleased. Will be addressed tomorrow)
- Weight (at 5' 8'', 165 pounds we are not talking overweight here, but I want to cut down on my stomach fat so I can see the abs I worked so hard to build over the last year)

Now, on to Tuesday. In the gym I just gave it 110% which admittedly doesn't always happen. Did my highest weight ever on weighted pullups, doing a total of 9 sets at 3 different grips with 25 pounds strapped on the dip belt. Struggled for every rep I got, but walked out today getting around 75 so I'm very happy about that. Afterwards, hung out with my friend from the gym while he got some work done on his car, then he helped me out updating my wardrobe. I probably laid down about 300 bucks today, probably overspent, but I wanted these additions to really help me look good this summer. Every purchase was well worth it in my book. During this time I nailed down 2 conversations, one with an acquaintance of my friend I had never spoken to before, and another with the cashier at the store. At this point I am now at 4/10 convos. Forgot to mention that my friend added a ****load of girls as friends on my facebook while I wasn't paying attention. Not sure what this will accomplish, but can't hurt haha.

Afterwards we both met up with some other guys we worked out with in the past to catch up. Just to update everyone, at this point I really have two groups of people I hang out with in my free time. One is my friends from high school. I get along with almost all of them, and while they aren't the coolest kids you could find yourself with in public, we've hung out for a long time and I don't really see that changing. Now, a new group I have been hanging around with are the people I met at the gym. These are just really cool dudes, they got their act together in all aspects of their life and really just provide a great support system inside the gym and out.

The gym group is who I hung out with tonight, which also included a dude who stopped going because of a shoulder injury. We went to Applebees and got a pretty, cute waitress (6.5-7 territory, liked her attitude lol). I think nothing of it, but then someone brought up how I was at a concert just a month ago dancing and grinding with some chick I just met there that night and said I should get something going with the waitress. With them egging me on with friendly threats ("we'll just tell her you're too shy and that you forced us to ask for her number for you") So I went for it. Ended up talking and even though I didn't get her number, I handed her my number with the bill on the way out. Not only did I make my first (sober) approach, but now I only have 5 conversations to complete by... tomorrow. Going to get a good night sleep to tackle my big day tomorrow.

So for those who didn't read the whole thing or want:

- 6/10 convos down, 4 to go
- Great job at the gym
- Major wardrobe update
- First sober approach
- Great night out, great day overall

EDIT: Forgot an approach with a female employee who helped me pick out shades. 4 to go tomorrow!

 

[kentgraham10]

Week 2, Day 7:

All I can say is holy **** was this hairstyle change long overdue. But first, my day. Kept up the 110% at the gym today going up by 40 pounds on squats to 225 and still hitting my 10 reps over 4 sets. Similar things can be said for the leg press and shoulder exercises I did today as well. What does this tell me? Despite the fact I was staying steady at the gym 5 days a week and getting real results (and people noticing these results too, example is someone that used to go to my old gym who said I came in scrawny but now I'm buff lol) I still could have been pushing myself harder this whole time! I am going to remember this and just try to escalate all my exercises I do, as long as I can maintain form + reps. Every body part I have worked out so far this week is completely sore, almost like when I first started going to the gym. In a way, great feeling to have.

To the haircut. My mom is a hairdresser so no excuse why this couldn't get done sooner but yes now its done, and what I've noticed with this haircut.

1) I am less approachable? A few older folks and even a dude my age were taken aback when I attempted to start conversations today, didn't have this happen at all earlier in the process. Not that this matters much because...

2) Looks from the ladies has gone up tenfold. No exaggeration. Where I used to get a handful of looks a day at most, I got somewhere around twenty. I am really pumped at what has happened, I feel like this was the final piece of the puzzle appearance-wise for me, as now my physique, wardrobe, acne, teeth, and now hair have all been addressed.

Unfortunately, I only got down one more conversation today, so I am at 7/10. I am going on with the bootcamp and trying to nail down the conversations as I go along (but to be fair, my approach the other night with the waitress was much ballsier than anything that should be attempted at this stage, so I'll give myself a 10/10 complete for this stage.)

Haven't heard much from the other guys doing the bootcamp, would love to hear from you guys, even if its just a quick post here saying you are still going strong or even if you gave up, curious on the reasoning behind that decision.

 

[diggnashun]

Hell yea man, keep up the good work. I've just started hitting the weights after reading Pook's "Skinny Guys" post. The problem for me is, taking Adderall kills my eating and sleeping habits, I went hard in the gym on Monday, didn't eat enough or get enough sleep yesterday, tried to throw em up today and I was still dead. No worries, I'll figure it out, maybe some cardio or sleeping remedies will help.

Anyway, I'm about to start my own boot camp, keep updating!

 

[Mr. Ballz]

Great Journal Kent. Don't cut yourself short and make excuses. You stated your earlier approach at the restaurant makes up for your missed conversations, but I urge you to consider that proof that you are up for any challenge the bootcamp gives you. It wont get any easier. Give it your all, you will feel better and grow at a faster pace.

 

[kentgraham10]

Hell yea man, keep up the good work. I've just started hitting the weights after reading Pook's "Skinny Guys" post. The problem for me is, taking Adderall kills my eating and sleeping habits, I went hard in the gym on Monday, didn't eat enough or get enough sleep yesterday, tried to throw em up today and I was still dead. No worries, I'll figure it out, maybe some cardio or sleeping remedies will help.

Anyway, I'm about to start my own boot camp, keep updating!

I'm not familiar with Adderall but eating and sleeping were problems for me too. What worked in my favor though is that I had a great routine and I stuck with it (missed on average 1 gym day a month the last year). If you do the same you WILL see results, just try getting in enough protein man!

And thanks Mr. Ballz, I will be giving it my all this week, updating later tonight or tomorrow. I'll let you guys know how it goes.