Does cuddling = sex

[Budda57]

Ok, here goes. I'm recently back into the dating scene. I met this girl a couple weekends ago. I found her on Facebook and started to talk to her some more. So I asked her out last week (Thursday). We had a cool and casual date going to get drinks, talking, and playing some pool. the night went well.

I just messaged her saying that we should get together Thursday or Friday of this week.

She typed back: lets do something, Wed night is comedy night, i know that wasn't one of the option but you know how i love barleys. Thursday is greys and then Friday I'm going out for sure, let me know what you think. i mean you can come over and watch TV with me if you'd like. .. cuddle time is my favorite thing ever

I'm cool with Wednesday night but she asking for sex or something along those lines. And if she is asking, how do I not **** the situation up.

 

[Teflon_Mcgee]

The funny thing is, a girl can cuddle all night without getting the least bit horny.

It's hard to say the same for a guy. But the fact that she'll allow you in her space to cuddle means if you have any skill at all you can get the lay. Just don't assume it will automaticly happen.

Touch her and seduce her. If she truly just wants to cuddle it could take hours. Especially if she directly stops your advances and freezing her out most likely won't work.

But through the proper use of words and kino you can make her want it.

Of course, it's quite possible cuddling is the closest thing she can use to get to sex without actualy asking for sex.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

cuddle b!tch(n) - a guy who never gets to sleep with a girl but gets to have intimate moments with her like cuddling, spooning, or otherwise being affectionate. Usually this will occur in private. She probably considers him a really sweet guy, which is the kiss of death.

First off, cuddle b!tches are bad, bad things to be. Maybe the worst thing to be. I mean, being an emotional tampon is bad, but being an emotional tampon who has to endure blue-balls is bordering on criminal.

Basically this is just a guy who has a very high position on the friends ladder. So far up the friends ladder that he gets the dubious honor of getting to provide all the intimacy that a girl is missing when she's off fukking guys who basically don't care about her like outlaw bikers and band members. So he gets to be the proxy father/confessor/friend/teddy bear for her, depending on what she is missing at the time.

How do we know this? Well, if a woman had a nice loving boyfriend then he would be doing all the cuddling and whatnot and likely wouldn't stand for a woman maintaining a stable of cuddle b!tches. Unless he's completelty pussified, in which case she's likely fukking some other people anyway.

The cuddle b!tch often thinks he is on the good ladder as opposed to the real ladder. So he gets all excited about his position instead of realizing he is being completely used. So this poor tool is really setting himself up for a fall at that point.


with appologies to Dallas from Intellectual Hoars

 

[Fuglydude]

I think cuddling, physical intimicy is great for leading into further stuff like... SEX!

Girls, in my experience LOVE to be touched, and cuddle. One of my most successful attack plans goes from cuddling, to massage to kissing, to more fun stuff... i have a 90-95% kill ratio with that plan of attack!

I think the most important thing w/ any girl is to be confident, sexual, strong and masculine. Combine this with a bit of humor and teasing and you'll have the chic eating outta your hand...

 

[ThunderMaverick]

Doesn't cuddling usually come AFTER sex? That's usually the proper order.

 

[blueguy]

It's great if you escalate it quickly. Otherwise, you'll turn in to a cuddle b!tch like Rollo posted.

Basically, you set the agenda. If all you're doing is cuddling for an extended period of time (few hours, dates, whatever), she's not going to get horny. She'll keep you in that slot, and you'll be her "cuddle b!tch."

 

[blueguy]

I've overheard girls talking about it before too... making fun of a guy who "wants to cuddle." They were all laughing. It's not a good thing. We want to have sex... girls want to cuddle.

Doesn't cuddling usually come AFTER sex? That's usually the proper order.

If you're watching a movie or what not, it starts with the cuddle, then making out, etc.

 

[ThunderMaverick]

I loved the tickling move. =) Where you and the chick would already be close and you just start tickling her until you have you arms wrapped around her body with your cheek brushing up against her, giggling in her ear. After that...Milk and cookies, baby.


Milk and cookies.

 

[DJDamage]

It's great if you escalate it quickly. Otherwise, you'll turn in to a cuddle b!tch like Rollo posted.

That is true.

You got to also look at the situation at hand. Personally I don't like the following things:

I just messaged her saying that we should get together Thursday or Friday of this week.

She typed back: lets do something, Wed night is comedy night, i know that wasn't one of the option but you know how i love barleys. Thursday is greys and then Friday I'm going out for sure, let me know what you think. i mean you can come over and watch TV with me if you'd like. .. cuddle time is my favorite thing ever

1)Why are you text message her for a date?! You got to pick up the phone and call her. Through conversation on the phone you can easily gauge her interest in you. What you did here was save face, it doesn't hurt as much if she rejects you but also it lowers her interest in you as oppose to asking her out on the phone.

2) Why is she calling all the shots?! it sounds to me as if she has her own agenda of life and you are there for the ride. It should be the other way around because it sounds as if she is wearing the pants in this relationship, no wonder your chances of being a cuddle b1tch remains high. She choose a freaking tv show over you!

However this is not a loss cause. She did say she wants to get close to you and that is usually a good sign. Just remember if you can't esscalate and she won't let you makeout with her but hold on to you like a fvcking teddy bear, then just leave her to her show and get the fvck out of there.

Facebook is just another tool for pretty chicks to get more attention then they get in the physical world.

 

[synergy1]

To answer the post, from experience: no it does not.

 

[blueguy]

I just messaged her saying that we should get together Thursday or Friday of this week.

She typed back: lets do something, Wed night is comedy night, i know that wasn't one of the option but you know how i love barleys. Thursday is greys and then Friday I'm going out for sure, let me know what you think. i mean you can come over and watch TV with me if you'd like. .. cuddle time is my favorite thing ever

I'm cool with Wednesday night but she asking for sex or something along those lines. And if she is asking, how do I not **** the situation up.

Haha... didn't actually read the post. Yeah, she's got you in a position right there. I'd be pissed if a girl talked to me like that. It sounds like she knows you like her and knows she can control the situation however she wants. And the title of your thread also tells me that "does cuddling = sex?" You want to know if she likes you before physically escalating. It even sounds as if you expect her to lead. I know it's repeated over and over again. But stop guessing. Be a man. You will lead her to sex. Who cares what she thinks or what her intentions are. I would set the agenda despite the options she's given you and gain control of the frame again.

 

[realsmoothie]

Wow, I must be special-ed or something... but I don't think I've EVER cuddled with a girl that didn't want to f*ck me.

As far as I'm concerned, any girl that makes constant physical contact is into me enough that - if I wanted and could summon up the balls to do it - I could have sex with them.

I'm a very shy guy, and have had many girls try and get me to bang them under the auspicion of "let's watch a movie at my place". In fact, this is the case almost 75% of the time in the last year or so. They know that I'm a p*ssy but that asking me over for a movie is as close to asking me over for sex as they can get without sounding too blatant.

I'm no expert at moving from cuddling to sex... but I do know that back massages are f*cking magic. If when you're cuddling you can do the "yawn... now I'm stretching and putting my arm behind your back" move, then get your hand behind her neck... a gentle rub somewhere just below the hairline is GOLD.

With my current "girlfriend", the first time I said this, she stopped watching the movie, closed her eyes and moaned something to the effect of "you don't know what you're doing to me"... I kept doing it for like three minutes, kind of laughing, until she turned to me and started making out.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Hey maybe this could be your next date idea?

http://www.cuddleparty.com/

Heheh,..

 

[Panda 2000]

Does cuddling = sex?

That's totally up to you. Go get her.

 

[MissionX]

Rollo Tomassi - For a mod you sure are kind of rude.... LoL Although it made me laugh a lot for the definition. Thanks But, in my experience, some girls like to cuddle before and after sex, it's just how it happens, but you have to make the move you can't just sit there like an AFC or else you will never get laid.

Budda57 - A few tips for you to get the gold. While cuddling, give her a massage, the skin is one of the largest sex organs in the body, explore a bit, kiss her neck bite it what ever you think might turn her on. *(When I say bite, I don't mean bite into her like a steak either. Gentle boy.)* While you are doing that play along with her reactions if she is into the vibe, explore some more, if you get a handful and she doesn't stop you then you are doing good, but if she says no or stop.... STOP, BUT keep warming warming up the oven, massage and what not.

There is nothing a girl likes more is if a guy knows how to use his hands. But if you do get further good luck and have fun. OH and wear a condom.

Smoke

 

[GloriouslyInsane]

Depends,if you're just sitting around and SHE starts massaging you and what not..then it is = sex.Just escalate and see,no other way actually.

 

[djbr]

Hey maybe this could be your next date idea?

http://www.cuddleparty.com/

Heheh,..

ROTFLMAO!

Talk about "mass masturbation" LOL!

 

[Vulpine]

Hands in the hair!

When you get a hand or two in her hair... it's all over - done deal.

Well, at least that's my angle. Hands in the hair; "Mmm's"? proceed to> (soft/light) hands on the neck; "Mmm's"? proceed to> (soft/light) lips on the neck... easy.

I'll remind you here, if she's on your couch, she's in-bounds. Your house, your couch, your woman. If she didn't want to fux, she wouldn't be there, or she can leave, yeah?

It fries my brain to acknowledge that snuggle b!tches can even exist!

 

[STR8UP]

Basically this is just a guy who has a very high position on the friends ladder. So far up the friends ladder that he gets the dubious honor of getting to provide all the intimacy that a girl is missing when she's off fukking guys who basically don't care about her like outlaw bikers and band members. So he gets to be the proxy father/confessor/friend/teddy bear for her, depending on what she is missing at the time................The cuddle b!tch often thinks he is on the good ladder as opposed to the real ladder. So he gets all excited about his position instead of realizing he is being completely used. So this poor tool is really setting himself up for a fall at that point.

You are 100% correct, to a point. But it all comes down to context, not necessarily content.

I have a couple of ladies that have spent the night with me on more than one occasion that I did not have sex with. We might go to first or second or even third base, but for whatever reason (either I'm not that attracted to them, tired, lazy, not horny enough) I don't make the effort to escalate and go in for the kill.

In cases like these I don't see it as a bad thing. If I am aware of what is transpiring (having a woman in my bed who I am not going to have sex with) and I am not clinging to false hope that it MIGHT happen, what's the harm? I might allow her to snuggle up a little, but when I want my space I send her to the other side of the bed.

BTW.....I would NEVER let myself get blue balls from a chick in this kind of situation. If you are going that far with her then you absolutely should be fukking her.

It's all about getting what YOU want out of the situation and not letting a woman take advantage of you.

It's the same with having female friends in general. Nothing wrong with it as long as you aren't following them around like puppy dogs hoping for a scrap to come your way.

Call me a homo or whatever, but I don't mind a little physical intimacy from time to time myself. And to tell you the truth I would rather get it from some chick that I don't have to be involved with on a regular basis. If you try doing that with a fukk buddy you will have a girlfriend in no time. I'd rather keep it separate. Ya feel me?

 

[MissionX]

You are 100% correct, to a point. But it all comes down to context, not necessarily content.

I have a couple of ladies that have spent the night with me on more than one occasion that I did not have sex with. We might go to first or second or even third base, but for whatever reason (either I'm not that attracted to them, tired, lazy, not horny enough) I don't make the effort to escalate and go in for the kill.

In cases like these I don't see it as a bad thing. If I am aware of what is transpiring (having a woman in my bed who I am not going to have sex with) and I am not clinging to false hope that it MIGHT happen, what's the harm? I might allow her to snuggle up a little, but when I want my space I send her to the other side of the bed.

BTW.....I would NEVER let myself get blue balls from a chick in this kind of situation. If you are going that far with her then you absolutely should be fukking her.

It's all about getting what YOU want out of the situation and not letting a woman take advantage of you.

It's the same with having female friends in general. Nothing wrong with it as long as you aren't following them around like puppy dogs hoping for a scrap to come your way.

Call me a homo or whatever, but I don't mind a little physical intimacy from time to time myself. And to tell you the truth I would rather get it from some chick that I don't have to be involved with on a regular basis. If you try doing that with a fukk buddy you will have a girlfriend in no time. I'd rather keep it separate. Ya feel me?

Bravo well stated.
Keep your girlfriends close, and your fxck buddies closer ^_^