Do you think this site is a liability for us?

[SoSuaveDude]

Talk about irony...We advocate the importance of not pedestaling women, yet technique after technique, and thread after thread seems to be in essence the distribution of advice to slay these "monstrous," sly, deceptively intelligent women. Are we giving them too much credit? And at some point, experience trumps all advice regardless of how great the quality advice is, experience will only help that top tier advice effectively slip into the subconscious and conscious mind... Maybe i'm being to analytical, but the fact of consciously knowing that we interact on a site devoted towards aiding personal performance with women on a daily basis makes me believe that we subconsciously begin to cautiously calculate every move in our interaction with women(even female friends), and we develop high(sometimes unrealistic) expectations that hinder our mood if not met. Idk, but it seems like utter fabrication and a recipe for disaster. Check this: If we're not happy without women, how will their companionship possibly change that? Your thoughts?

 

[sstype]

You're absolutely right man.....

The danger of this site is the tendency to replace one form of female supplication (AFC, buying flowers, being a nice guy) with another (spin plates, approach women all the time, be the alpha male).

Its the other side of the same coin.....which is to live your life in some way shape or form trying to "give women what they want"

We're told to live amazing lifestyles, to have 1000 friends, to be masters at witty comebacks and clever conversation, to look like greek gods, to wear the nicest clothes, make 100,000 a year, to master "game", be ****y and funny, be exciting, be persistent, be indifferent, have female friends, have lots of hobbies.....on and on and on about all the things WE need to do to "give women what they want"

Yet almost all women could never meet the standards they (or we ourselves) set in order for us to be considered "worthy" of their attention. Most of them are unattractive, out-of-shape, rude, obnoxious, lazy, boring, and a pain in the ass to deal with.

If you can't see the absurdity of it all then you're still stuck in the "rat race" mindset. Being a true man means not giving a flying f*ck what women want or don't want. I wasn't put on this earth to make every girl feel amazing around me simply b/c God gave her a vag.

So yeah man I'm with you. Time to evolve past this narrow minded "DJ vs. AFC" mentality that serves to keep men enslaved to the pu*sy.

 

[rushing dude 123]

Great post, I totally agree. I think this is the stage I have been going through in the past 4 months. I feel that this website is just to open your eyes of what is around you and seeing things for how they really are, but once you can see it and have learned what you needed to learn there is not much point here. It then starts to have a negative effect, you start to put way too much emphasis on women. Life should be about you living your life and dreams and being happy with yourself and then some women seem to pass some of your crossroads till you find the right girl.

When I first got here everything I was doing felt right and great, but slowly slowly has I started spinning more and more plates, it felt like I was losing myself and going backwards (how can this be?). I know the reason is because I have pritorised my life over women more than myself, trying to become the best. After dating more and more and trying to fill some empty hole, i have realised that none of them can make me happy till I fufil that within myself.

I do feel experience trumps all advice as well, there is guys out there that don't even know what a DJ is, yet they still can be one. However we come on here trying to learn more and more, discussing the best ways to catch them, although majority of us already know this off the top of our heads and if not, we can figure it out quite easily. I personally know I have become addicted to this and it has or was becoming a serious problem. I think I have been here for 5 years and I think my time to leave has come now permenantly and I don't think I am the only one. There is a lot of guys I know on here who have a lot going for themselves and I know for a fact don't need this site or any other to tone up their skills (You know who you are).

Sosuave is such a great tool and can give you so much knowledge and insight in life, but it is ironically a paradox which you have discovered as well. Sosuave preaches that you become your own man and you make yourself the prize and become happy within yourself. This initially becomes the goal and you end up getting positive results, but sometimes you can taste the fruit (women) and then end up getting greedy (ONS +Many plates) and forget the real reason you tasted it in the first place. I have come to realise this and have recently dropped all my plates, but one who I genuinely want to be with, so I can stop wasting time and use that time on myself.

I think your post applys to some of the people on sosuave and maybe even yourself considering you have questioned it. I guess you got to ask yourself the question do i still need to be here and is it having a negative effect on me? however some people may still need to learn more from this place considering it has vast knowledge and is designed to allow you to help you to get to a stage where you need to think for yourself.

So it basicaly depends on what stage you are at I think. Thanks for the insight sosuavedude, I think your post has helped me come to terms of what I need to do.

 

[Gray The Prince]

I agree. This site is meant to get you on your feet and send you on your way. There is no need to hang around forever or use this site as a crutch. In the end, one who comes on here for EVERY SINGLE PROBLEM OR MOVE WILL BE A SLAVE TO THE GAME FOREVER.

That's why, when I learn what I can and get a good run and really have good insight for the rest of the way, I'm going to leave this site. However, I probably won't forget about Sosuave and if I see a guy in need, I'll take him under my wing and remember what I learned here.

 

[KingofHearts]

good topic. People come to this site for different reasons and take away different messages. Your questions do bring up a solid point - why do guys need all this intel just to pick up girls? Just on a biological level, it should be pretty simple right? We all now its more complicated though. Why do sites like these exist? Just off the top of my head...

1) girls start reading cosmo at an early age and learn all this stuff we learn on sites like this (at a much older age)

2) thanks to women's rights movements over the last few decades, women are protected, empowered and have increased sexual leverage as men's value has dropped. So, now men need to work harder and have more going for them just to pull the same quality of women compared to the past.

3) men are held back from being men. It starts in schools with "play nice". Then continues in hs and college where we learn how to court women and learn that "no means no". The school system and testing has been ever increasingly favoring women (a source would good here, look it up if you've got a few minutes). And finally in adulthood where we learn that to being a "real man" means handing over yours balls to women because "she's always right".

Obviously not a an air tight argument, but it does point out the kind of disadvantage men have compared to past times. No reason to make a big deal out of it or cry foul. This is the hand we've been dealt, so we just have to decide how we're going to play it. And as the OP pointed out, sites like sosuave have good and bad effects. I'm starting to realize that there are some things I wish I could have learned through experience instead of online. But I can't complain about some of the good things that I've had happen thanks to ideas I've taken from this site. And overall, its helped me confirm many questions I've had but we're not very PC. Came across this website in 2007, and 4 years later its still a great resource for me from time to time.

 

[crazyboy]

All men need to is trust our instincts and we would succeed. Woman are simiple there not really complex. They are complex we as men make it complex. We try to put woman as equal to us and treat them that way but in all reality. We need to be more dominate and exert our presence. What need to know that women are not equal to us. Women are not expected to get a job and be succesfull they get a praise when they do because she so "strong". Women are not expect to be leader, not expected to provide. You know what the only thing women are expect to do is have kids, watch kids, and be "nice and caring woman." Beside that everything is place on men to make **** happen and that what we need to realize. We need to make **** happen. When woman says I dont need a man to make me happy. Then tell her ass stop *****ing go find something that you make you happy then "strong" woman. Be a man about it.

 

[zekko]

Its the other side of the same coin.....which is to live your life in some way shape or form trying to "give women what they want"

We're told to live amazing lifestyles, to have 1000 friends, to be masters at witty comebacks and clever conversation, to look like greek gods, to wear the nicest clothes, make 100,000 a year, to master "game", be ****y and funny, be exciting, be persistent, be indifferent, have female friends, have lots of hobbies.....on and on and on about all the things WE need to do to "give women what they want"

I do think this website is worthwhile, but I agree with this to an extent.
Guys come here and a lot of them completely change their personalities, completely abandon who they are. Why? Just to please women. It is still supplicating and pedestalizing in a sense - it's making women the top priority.

Having said that, a lot of times guys do need to change their mindsets and the way they look at things. And if you have an issue with women, I don't think there's anything wrong with putting some effort into it to get it resolved.

 

[loveshogun]

This website is a great resource for everyone who is ready to hear and undertake the advice within.

However, most newbies are absolutely not ready for any of this stuff because they're usually looking for the quick fix for their "this one girl" story.

My advice is generally unpopular for newbies because I tell them that women are the last thing they need, and the putting down the sandwich, getting a life, and cutting the bullsh*t whining is the way to a happier life.

We should have a dating license exam. Qualifications would include:

1) A job that provides financial security and independence
2) A circle of at least 3 male close friends with whom adventures can be had
3) A hobby or passion
4) Must be on the road to completing some relevant life goal

Don't have those 4 things? Well, you're not allowed to date. Fortunately, the dating market is completely unregulated, so a lot of the under-qualified are mercilessly kicked off of the playing field... unfortunately, they come to SoSuave thinking that they can cheat the game.

 

[PapiChulo]

Gotta have the pu$$y that's why we are all slaves to it anyway. The other thing about people abandoning who they were previously is essentially a positive thing. In the sense that you get to see the light and make serious realizations about why your current identity doesn't do that well for you. You learn a skill set, develop yourself, push the boundaries. And it happens in all aspects of ones life, shy people turn extroverts, gamer nerds go on adventures. And then who is to say it is only to supplicate in order to get some? It would be easier to just buy a wh@re, wouldn't it? It is a bonus that women happen to love men who lead a good life. As long as one does not sell their soul for pu$$y it is all cool with me.

 

[RSanders219]

I don't know man.. I see where you're coming from how this site is sort of a double edged sword. On one side we're saying "don't let women intimidate you/bring you down.. Just do what you want, improve yourself, set goals, master game, dress nice etc.." But on the other side, we're doing all of this just to make them want us.

But hey, before I found this site I was sort of just plain lost. I had dated this really cute girl for a few weeks and she let me down. I felt like sh!t all the time, drank too much, smoked too much MJ, and was unemployed at the time. Total loser. Then I was just bored one day and googled "How to get girls" like a total AFC, and fvck! I still pull AFC stuff from time to time, but not even close to how frequently I did before.

But with this site I learned all about the Inner Game. Which is what I really love. Just constantly improving myself, setting goals, planning my future, etc. With the help of this I have a full time job, make decent money, have my own place, have a nice car etc. etc.. (Don't get me wrong, I could definitely use a raise ). Once you learn this the girls just flock to you man. It's crazy!

 

[Cherokee]

No offence to you guys, but attracting women is one of the main reasons you exist on this planet. You are here to reproduce. Ok I know society has evolved, and yes the thought of having kids is horrific at a young age, or at any age for some of you, but it is the reason you're alive. Embrace your sexuality and your masculinity.

Sure, don't make women your life, but they are a very important aspect of being a man.

Most of the guys that come on here (including myself) started off very bitter, against all women, because some broad broke our hearts. Those of us who understand nature, then turn the bitterness into a desire to become a better person in general. Those who lack the understanding, turn the bitterness outwardly and attack society. These are the men who say "All women are slvts" etc.

This site can be a great asset on the path to manhood, don't get caught up with the little games and tricks. As said a million times before, focus on your life, change the bits you don't like and grow as an individual. As you sow, you will reap.

Good luck to every brother on the path to manhood.