do you think its afc to send ex birthday message on fb

[spectacular]

My ex broke up with me last year october...I tried to fix things coz part of it was my fault but she didnt wanna listen...I went NC on her.Basically our relationship was long distance and wasnt serious cos she initiated we should be exclusive and we talked a lot of Bs(joked alot and pillow talked about her loser bf's).I felt connected and told her even if we dont work out in the future I wouldnt want our friendship to go south.We got in touch some months back and she told me she was in a relationship and I acted indifferent,joked a little and told her to send me invites to her wedding lol!...I also told her to come to my place sometime so we can catch up and see strippers together but she flaked and didnt return my calls...I still maintained NC till now.Her birthday is next week and I've always sent her fb birthday messages even even when we broke up.Do you think its afc to send her a birthay message on fb?thanks...

 

[Kbomb]

Yes, move on. She see's right through you.

 

[3countriesPlan]

I still send christmas and birthday messages to my ex who I broke up with in 2006 cause shes a genuinely great person and she sends me those messages too however the dynamic between you and her is fvcked so just dont bother

 

[Harry Wilmington]

Got another man, flaked on you, hasn't returned calls... sure, send her a message! :crackup:

 

[pdx1138]

I thought about sending the most recent ex a birthday message then contemplated what I would REALLY gain from it and thankfully came to my senses.

you should do the same.

You're likely to do so or "want to" if you have no other options.

get some options.

 

[HalfAddict]

I think the real question here is.... why do you want to send her a birthday message?

 

[Mr. Bond]

First, if any question starts with "Is it AFC if I..." ...the answer is probably yes.

Everyone will have a different answer, and it really only matters what YOU think. Personally, I say it isn't always AFC. In your situation, it is.

If my ex was and is respectful to me, I will wish her happy birthday. If she disrespects me, why should I waste any time on her?

 

[zinc4]

well....yes and it's also hurting yourself because deep down or maybe even not so deep you would like to get back with her...if you have the urge to get back with the person than no contact is a must...your birthday messages mean that you are not in fact no contact...no contact means absolutely no contact...

it's different if you are completely over her and genuinely want to be friends if you still in fact value her as a friend or do that sort of thing..i don't but to each and their own...but this is obviously not the case here...also no contact makes you stronger and feel better about yourself...i went no contact with my ex wife who i was also best friends with and was pretty much my everything after she cheated on me with another man several times in our home while i was gone...and soon after NC she was calling me begging me back and at least for a friendship and i told her no i don't do that and she called back numerous times after that and even continued the calls a year later...but i didn't answer her calls, excpet for one more which i told her no again to being friends and good luck with her life.......i feel like it was a great test in my life and value it even though it hurt at the time...that is the point of NC....not to get the girl back IMO even though i didn't want to think that at the time...point is drop her forever if you have any romantic feelings for her...it's a test of character and will power that we all have to face sometimes

 

[omega05]

I think the real question here is.... why do you want to send her a birthday message?

this

 

[spectacular]

thanks guys...I appreciate it.

 

[myopoh]

Don't do it Spectacular, it will only stroke her ego and at this point she doesn't give a damn about you.

 

[sarcastic sam]

Of course it's not afc to send her a happy birthday message on facebook, only as long as you include a picture of pink flowers and lots of smiley faces in your message.

Don't forget to also tell her how much you miss her and how bad you still love her, so everyone on your friends list can see what a champ you are with women

And this is the most important part: write to her that you totally understand why she dumped your a$$ to begin with but that you've changed a lot and are ready to be the man she wants. Do this all, and it will show everyone what a great alpha male you really are.

 

[georgetheman]

Yes. Pretend your ex doesnt exist. That attracts them even more and shes a waste of your time anyway