Do you pay for dates in the beginning?

[Hexagram]

So I took this HB 7.5 out for a few drinks last week, and we ended up having quite a bit. The bill was pretty expensive, and we ended up splitting it. Probably not a good idea to have taken her to a fairly expensive place so early--something Ill keep in mind for the next time.

Now its not that I cant pay for her, but I dont want to put her on a pedestal and start paying for her when I hardly even know her. She might get too used to the idea as well. Anyway, was wondering what you guys generally do in the first couple of dates?

 

[sighsigh]

I personally don't see any disadvantages with paying in full for the first couple of dates (assuming spending money isn't a big deal for you).

If you are worried about looking needy, that isn't going to happen unless you take her to a super-fancy place or continue full paying after the first few dates.

And if you don't pay there is a high chance you will come across looking like a cheap f*ck.

So IMO you should full pay as the negatives outweigh the positives if you don't.

 

[Zodiac]

Don't pay too much unless you want to be accustomed to the girl expecting to have access to your wallet.

 

[floydb25]

Don't mind paying, but am not a drinker (anymore), so no worries on that front. Attracts better quality women when you don't find them in drinking avenues, as well. No fancy restaurants, or anything too expensive. No big deal.

Dating doesn't have to be expensive. The main thing is having a good time and getting to know a new person. No need to make it any bigger than it is.

 

[perseverance]

I have a test, when it comes to splitting the bill or paying, I'll read the price of the bill out loud, get my wallet out and pull the cash out, if she doesn't offer to split the bill with me, then I take it as a sign that she expects me to fund her social outings with me and she drops down in my estimations. If she offers to go dutch, depending on the mood I am in, sometimes I'll take her up on her offer and sometimes I'll pay in full.

I don't think splitting the bill is a sign of a cheap person, it's the sign of a person who values their finances and doesn't want to splash their cash on someone who hasn't earned such a privilege yet.

I think with all this equality stuff flying about that women should pay for their half in everything from dates, to weddings, to houses, cars and children. I think it's sexist for a woman to use a man as a gravy train for her and her expenses.

 

[PrettyBoyAJ]

You end where you start. Spend money on her now and you will do it later. I never pay for dates. Either the girls spots the whole thing or we pay for our seperate stuff.

 

[MasterFuu]

One word.... investment.

On first date when you and her get the bill wait little and see if she will offer to split. Personally I would say thanks to her for offering but pay anyway. If she offers then she would qualify for second date considering everything else went well (conversations, chemistry).

If the girl just looks at me and does not even bother to offer to split then I would pay anyway but not call her again. I'm not a free meal for anyone....
I think when it comes to dating the respect and interest should be mutual and both parties involved.

A friend of mine actually let's the date pay half each time (on first date) so she also invests early on. If she ends up investing her money over period of time the chances are she will not be willing to let go of you as easily as if she didn't invest at all.

 

[runner83]

The scary thing is that looking back, the last 9 girls I banged, I never even took them on a date before I banged them.

Once I have hit it, no real issue with paying for it, but it is amazing how often the girl seems to want to pay for it.

I even had one girl rushing to the counter, credit card in hand, eager to pay for sushi, even though I knew she wasn't as well off as me. And this was a girl I was banging while I was away on holidays for a few weeks, and she knew this.

I ended up paying and then taking her back to the place I was staying and banging her in the pool (not for the first time).

It really depends on your financial situation is and how much money you can outlay, but really, if a chick is into you and not just using you for your wallet, she will likely offer to pay at some stage in the early dates.

 

[TheMale]

coll advices guys, but when it comes to the bill, what are you saying ?
'listen, you women, wanted to be equal to us in life, in work etc. so now you can pay your part !' ;p
more seriousely how do you bring it up (the talking part) to make her pay half of it, or her part ?

i used for 2,3 times something like: 'food on me, drink on you.'
and i used it once: 'i'll pay for this activity, you'll pay the next'

ut besides that (and if you date a chick for a month now) you can repeat the same stuff

 

[Love's Orphan]

Go to inexpensive places for the first few dates; coffee, bowling, pool, movies. No restaurants before 3rd/4th date. You will filter out all the hungry ones.

 

[FairShake]

First of all, I was unaware people under 28 or so still went on dates. Everyone I know pretty much invites the girl over to watch a movie or meets them at a bar with other friends.

That said, if you are old fashioned like me...

Go to inexpensive places for the first few dates; coffee, bowling, pool, movies. No restaurants before 3rd/4th date. You will filter out all the hungry ones.

Pretty much this. I personally think that NOT PAYING is a free ticket (pun intended) to the friendzone. We all quite rightly whine about feminism but this is pre-feminism right here boys and it still remains. How do you like it?

But I am not shelling out for expensive dinners unless we are romantic. It's my little rule.