Do you notice niches

[Pandora]

I am starting to see a general pattern. I have noticed that guys generally attract females that are similar to themselves. Guys have a certain niche of girls that are attracted to that type of personality.
The pattern I see is that chemistry happens between people that have complementing personalities. It seems that introspective girls are attracted to introspective guys. Average intelligence superficial girls are attracted to average intelligence superficial guys. Dysfunctional types generally attract dysfunctional chicks. Nerdy guys usually end up with pretty nerdy girlfriends. Opposites don't attract, likeness attract. A very well read, introspective, interesting guy is not going to vibe very well with your average superficial club chick. He can fake it for a while but there will not be true chemistry.
People have to have the same sense of humor which often comes from having the same level of intelligence. A female also has to see the same things as valuable that you do or else any conversation outside of game will seem forced and awkward. I predict that many intelligent and interesting decent looking guys that have women problems are going after the wrong type of girls.
What I am trying to say is that do you guys see any patterns to who you more easily attract based on your personality? Doesn’t it seem like guys often have a certain niche of female that they are most successful with? If you take them out of this niche and surround them with girls of a different socioeconomic class or just a different level of intelligence they don’t do nearly as well. Its like night and day. This causes most of a problem for well adjusted intelligent guys because its hard to find well adjusted intelligent young females.

 

[katatonia]

What I am trying to say is that do you guys see any patterns to who you more easily attract based on your personality?

I find myself extremely attracted to skinny white girls with a hot face, smallish and firm set of tits/ass? WAT DO?

But nah seriously guys aren't attracted to personality, but to appearance. So what's the point of this thread?

I consider myself rather intelligent and introspective but I would not want a girl who was similar in that regard.

 

[zekko]

I am starting to see a general pattern. I have noticed that guys generally attract females that are similar to themselves. Guys have a certain niche of girls that are attracted to that type of personality.

I agree with you for the most part, although I think it applies more for relationships. With one night stands I don't think it matters so much.

It's only natural that people will relate to each other better if they have a common background or common interests. Having said that, I've always tended to be more intelligent than my girlfriends. I think it may be part of what attracts them to me, that lets them look up to me or whatever. In return it probably has allowed me to set the frame more without being questioned (although in the past I didn't reallly know what a "frame" was). They just figure I know what I'm doing.

 

[Slickster]

I agree 100%. I consider myself to be quite intelligent and I learned a long time back that I have no patience for superficial dumb chicks regardless of how hot they are.

For a drunken one nighter you can pretty much put up with anyone but when the morning comes it's just like your bad hangover. "What was I thinking?" :crazy:

 

[Trader]

The pattern I see is that chemistry happens between people that have complementing personalities. It seems that introspective girls are attracted to introspective guys. Average intelligence superficial girls are attracted to average intelligence superficial guys. Dysfunctional types generally attract dysfunctional chicks. Nerdy guys usually end up with pretty nerdy girlfriends. Opposites don't attract, likeness attract. A very well read, introspective, interesting guy is not going to vibe very well with your average superficial club chick. He can fake it for a while but there will not be true chemistry.

Opposites attract when it comes to submissiveness/dominance. A dominant man always attracts the submissive girl.

Like attracts like when it comes to personal interests. I agree with you that a nerdy guy won't click well with superficial club chicks.

The takeaway is the obvious. Stop going for girls just based on looks alone but only go for girls that you are attracted physically, mentally, and emotionally. Not only will you have more fun, but you will be more successful.

What's really interesting is when guys create a paradox - which is difficult to do. For example, a superficial guy who is dressed to the nines (pretty boy), yet is totally smart and intelligent (nerd boy) and is maxed out with muscles (muscle boy).

Pretty boy + nerd boy + muscle boy = paradox. Girls want to place you into a specific category, but they cannot. This is highly seductive.

 

[horaholic]

I guess Im a combo of 'bad boy' plus 'nerd boy,' (intelligence wise, not nerdy looking.) which is a wierd combo. I dont know what that says about the women I date though.

 

[Splendidostring]

I disagree. Speaking by experience I can say that opposites attract each other.

I'm a laid-back, not career driven, party kind of guy and I tend to attract woman who are career-driven, work-driven, the kind of woman who never stops doing ...stuff (it pisses me off BTW).

 

[zekko]

I consider myself to be quite intelligent and I learned a long time back that I have no patience for superficial dumb chicks regardless of how hot they are.

Ah, but while the girls I usually end up may not be that intelligent, they are not the superficial types either. I guess I like girls that aren't that smart but have some substance to them, like a sense of morality for example.

I'm a laid-back, not career driven, party kind of guy and I tend to attract woman who are career-driven, work-driven, the kind of woman who never stops doing ...stuff (it pisses me off BTW).

Oh, I hear you there. I've been out with that type. Seems like they're busy too often, too involved with work and such. I like a girl who's willing to clear her schedule for me

 

[sodbuster]

Well, for the women, I tend to attract TALL women.Probably because I'm bigger.THEN I worry about the personality. There I like the same personality as I have. Goal driven,serious with a fun side etc. Problem with goal driven women comes when YOU are not their goal. If you've been replaced by work, they suck to date.

 

[Luthor Rex]

I am starting to see a general pattern. I have noticed that guys generally attract females that are similar to themselves. Guys have a certain niche of girls that are attracted to that type of personality.
The pattern I see is that chemistry happens between people that have complementing personalities. It seems that introspective girls are attracted to introspective guys. Average intelligence superficial girls are attracted to average intelligence superficial guys. Dysfunctional types generally attract dysfunctional chicks. Nerdy guys usually end up with pretty nerdy girlfriends. Opposites don't attract, likeness attract. A very well read, introspective, interesting guy is not going to vibe very well with your average superficial club chick. He can fake it for a while but there will not be true chemistry.

Yes, the research does back up your personal observations. The technical term is "assortative mating".

Another American study published in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences in 2003, came to similar conclusions as the Iowa research: "in Western civilization, humans do not use an “opposites-attract” or a “reproductive-potentials-attract” determination in their selection of long-term mates but rather a “likes-attract” pattern founded on a preference for partners who are alike to their own personalities across a number of characteristics".

What's really disturbing is that we do this even when we pick our pets.

This causes most of a problem for well adjusted intelligent guys because its hard to find well adjusted intelligent young females.

This wouldn't really surprise me.

 

[Duffdog]

Nah,

I just think that people get whatever is in their social hierarchy. Obviously, if you are a nerd, you can't get a super hot sales girl with a perfect body because you won't satisfy her. So, you settle for the librarian type girl because that is what you can get. Likewise, the football players get the cute cheerleaders because the nerdy sloppy chics aren't good enough for them. Same with the tatted up guys with motorcycles-- the boring club girls don't excite them, so those two social groups never interact, thus there is very little mating between social groups.

So yeah, the research most likely says that people pick out others based on personality traits, but personality only happens after looks happen. So most likely, it is case of the researchers claims equaling the "wagon before the horse"

 

[mrRuckus]

Obviously, if you are a nerd, you can't get a super hot sales girl with a perfect body because you won't satisfy her. So, you settle for the librarian type girl because that is what you can get. Likewise, the football players get the cute cheerleaders because the nerdy sloppy chics aren't good enough for them.

What if i'm a nerdy football player with a nerdy cheerleader who wants to be a librarian?

 

[Luthor Rex]

Obviously, if you are a nerd, you can't get a super hot sales girl with a perfect body because you won't satisfy her.

The only thing an intelligent man could do with a moron sales woman is pump & dump her. She will satisfy no other need he has. So even if she shoots him down for a date, so what? What did he really lose besides a ONS? These women are so replaceable and disposable that missing one opportunity really doesn't matter much.

So yeah, the research most likely says that people pick out others based on personality traits, but personality only happens after looks happen. So most likely, it is case of the researchers claims equaling the "wagon before the horse"

LOL I love the arrogance of uneducated people! "If the research disagrees with me then the research must be wrong!"

As Bertrand Russell said: "The trouble with the world is that the stupid are ****sure and the intelligent are full of doubt."

The Dunning–Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which "people reach erroneous conclusions and make unfortunate choices but their incompetence robs them of the metacognitive ability to realize it". The unskilled therefore suffer from illusory superiority, rating their own ability as above average, much higher than actuality; by contrast the highly skilled underrate their abilities, suffering from illusory inferiority.

Morons thinking they know what's up... hur hur hur, HUR HUR!

 

[Duffdog]

The only thing an intelligent man could do with a moron sales woman is pump & dump her. She will satisfy no other need he has. So even if she shoots him down for a date, so what? What did he really lose besides a ONS? These women are so replaceable and disposable that missing one opportunity really doesn't matter much.



LOL I love the arrogance of uneducated people! "If the research disagrees with me then the research must be wrong!"

As Bertrand Russell said: "The trouble with the world is that the stupid are ****sure and the intelligent are full of doubt."

The Dunning–Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which "people reach erroneous conclusions and make unfortunate choices but their incompetence robs them of the metacognitive ability to realize it". The unskilled therefore suffer from illusory superiority, rating their own ability as above average, much higher than actuality; by contrast the highly skilled underrate their abilities, suffering from illusory inferiority.

Morons thinking they know what's up... hur hur hur, HUR HUR!

I like how you just copied and pasted a wikipedia entry in an effort to assert your superiority. It is you who are exhibiting the Dunning-Kruger effect...lol!

Allow me to present an alternative wikipedia entry which explains your internal conflicts. Truly, reading others' wikipedia entries seems to test the limits of your cognitive abilities so I will attempt not to exceed them:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-serving_bias

Have a nice day.

 

[Colossus]

The OP is oversimplifying. There are way too many variables in attraction to distill it down to one neat little axiom, such as "like attracts like".

I agree with Duffdog that social hierarchy generally dictates someone's market share of who they can attract....but most of it is superficial. Some factors can supersede this; such as high status and wealth, or exceptional good looks.

 

[Tazman]

I think it really depends on value and what you bring to the table. People can and do change depending on their circumstance. I've personally seen a friend change his general attitude based on the chick he was currently with, it was quite annoying at times. However, there are some traits about people that seem to remain constant.

I'm a short guy, but I've had more than a few women who were taller than me express an interest. I remember being a bit confused by it because I've always heard the opposite, and I do believe women prefer taller men, but that didn't stop these particular chicks.

I've been with chicks that were nothing like me and it didn't deter them in the slightest. Of course I don't really look for specifics when it comes to women, she just has to be sexually attractive and easy going. I'm not looking for a woman with a mans intellect, if I want to have an intellectual conversation my best option is another guy.

People will always have "preferences" but these things can be influenced by individual circumstances and situations. That's why the more attractive the person is, the more scrutinizing they'll be, as opposed to the less attractive who seem to be less "superficial". However, I think we're all superficial and there's nothing wrong with that, it serves it's purpose.