Herb
Don Juan
- Joined
- Oct 9, 2016
- Messages
- 78
- Reaction score
- 18
- Age
- 34
I was just curious about others opinions and experiences with this. It doesn't really have to do with any current situation in my life. I just noticed a lot of girls are unrealistic about where they stand, like if you approach a more average girl at a bar, they can actually be more testy and hostile and bitchy than some hotter ones (there are exceptions though, and I've met more humble girls). I bring this up because recently a girl I briefly went on a few dates with like four years ago hit me up again and made me recall the stupid drama with her from long ago...
She was a rather short and round Latina overall (though totally American and grew up here all her life) that I briefly hooked up with as a rebound, only to find that she was basically a virgin and got really attached. A year and a half older than me, but more immature in many ways, since she was basically a life noob without real experiences, having been a sheltered daddy's girl. Never left the U.S. and barely ever left her tri-state area. Just lived in a bubble. Her family ran a restaurant and property management business that became decently lucrative over time and her job was to help out with it, even though she never finished college. I was surprised by how little she knew or cared about **** in the real world, or just general knowledge; she thought I was weird for not liking mainstream pop music that appeals to basic b*tches. Always tried to act like she could keep up with me in terms of understanding more complex topics, despite failing badly; she would never admit she was anything short of brilliant and prided herself on being "classy".
But despite all this and her appearance, she thought she was God's gift to Earth and was genuinely surprised and confused when I told her that I wasn't attracted to her after a couple of weeks (I had problems even messing around with her if not sufficiently inebriated)! Said something like "I don't understand how someone can't be attracted to me"... She's like maybe a 5.5 at best and I'm like a 7-7.5 (she's 5'3" and like over 180lb and doesn't even have much in the way of boobs- somehow she managed to become a "plus-sized model" for this like third-rate agency; no idea how since usually they're taller and bustier or have better faces). Instead of losing weight like she said she would, she never worked out and actually gained some over the month and a half I knew her. I was misled by her online pics but was awful with women back then and desperate for a rebound so I just went with it after meeting her since I had already made the time/money investment.
She kept saying that all these guys would constantly hit on her (out of the five or six times I went out with her, I only saw a couple of black guys who liked big booties talk to her), but relationship-wise she had only been with one guy for 6 months shortly before meeting me, despite being 26. Yet she acted like it was her who's turning down all these guys, not that other guys weren't interested in her. But she actually believed what she was saying! And she thought she was on par with me. After hearing what I said she said “well tbh I never really found you all that attractive anyway and neither did my friends”, despite her being obsessed with me and her friends also showing interest (her one gay friend thought I was gay since I was with her and kept hitting on me one night insisting I was in denial LOL). I guess getting constant reinforcement that she was a pretty little princess from her family and friends all while growing up actually convinced her that was the case or something. Or else the delusion is just a deep-seated mental/psychological mechanism for protecting herself.
I think for some girls, there's nothing anyone can say to change their mind. Not that people should tell them, since that's mean. But she was kind of asking for it after a while. And she apparently hasn't been with anyone else in the last four years, and is now randomly showing interest in me again... I think I screwed this girl up giving her an unrealistic expectation by showing (fake) interest in her. She's only going to go for guys that are out of her league now, and needs a dose of reality at some point in her life, cause she just turned 30. I'm never making the mistake of stooping that low again, that's for sure!
I've also been with girls that are quite humble and don't give themselves enough credit. But most girls I met think they're hotter than they are. Is that just how it is?
She was a rather short and round Latina overall (though totally American and grew up here all her life) that I briefly hooked up with as a rebound, only to find that she was basically a virgin and got really attached. A year and a half older than me, but more immature in many ways, since she was basically a life noob without real experiences, having been a sheltered daddy's girl. Never left the U.S. and barely ever left her tri-state area. Just lived in a bubble. Her family ran a restaurant and property management business that became decently lucrative over time and her job was to help out with it, even though she never finished college. I was surprised by how little she knew or cared about **** in the real world, or just general knowledge; she thought I was weird for not liking mainstream pop music that appeals to basic b*tches. Always tried to act like she could keep up with me in terms of understanding more complex topics, despite failing badly; she would never admit she was anything short of brilliant and prided herself on being "classy".
But despite all this and her appearance, she thought she was God's gift to Earth and was genuinely surprised and confused when I told her that I wasn't attracted to her after a couple of weeks (I had problems even messing around with her if not sufficiently inebriated)! Said something like "I don't understand how someone can't be attracted to me"... She's like maybe a 5.5 at best and I'm like a 7-7.5 (she's 5'3" and like over 180lb and doesn't even have much in the way of boobs- somehow she managed to become a "plus-sized model" for this like third-rate agency; no idea how since usually they're taller and bustier or have better faces). Instead of losing weight like she said she would, she never worked out and actually gained some over the month and a half I knew her. I was misled by her online pics but was awful with women back then and desperate for a rebound so I just went with it after meeting her since I had already made the time/money investment.
She kept saying that all these guys would constantly hit on her (out of the five or six times I went out with her, I only saw a couple of black guys who liked big booties talk to her), but relationship-wise she had only been with one guy for 6 months shortly before meeting me, despite being 26. Yet she acted like it was her who's turning down all these guys, not that other guys weren't interested in her. But she actually believed what she was saying! And she thought she was on par with me. After hearing what I said she said “well tbh I never really found you all that attractive anyway and neither did my friends”, despite her being obsessed with me and her friends also showing interest (her one gay friend thought I was gay since I was with her and kept hitting on me one night insisting I was in denial LOL). I guess getting constant reinforcement that she was a pretty little princess from her family and friends all while growing up actually convinced her that was the case or something. Or else the delusion is just a deep-seated mental/psychological mechanism for protecting herself.
I think for some girls, there's nothing anyone can say to change their mind. Not that people should tell them, since that's mean. But she was kind of asking for it after a while. And she apparently hasn't been with anyone else in the last four years, and is now randomly showing interest in me again... I think I screwed this girl up giving her an unrealistic expectation by showing (fake) interest in her. She's only going to go for guys that are out of her league now, and needs a dose of reality at some point in her life, cause she just turned 30. I'm never making the mistake of stooping that low again, that's for sure!
I've also been with girls that are quite humble and don't give themselves enough credit. But most girls I met think they're hotter than they are. Is that just how it is?