Do or Do Not! Try is not an option

[Steelie Dan]

Hey again!

Got date #5 with HB 8. We had oral sex with each other on date #3. I really like this chick. Still having hard time reading her LTR IL. She seems to like it when I kiss here and give her nice hugs. I have read a lot of posts saying let her tell you if she wants more. I have created space. I don't phone her to talk, just to set up dates. I think she is testing me because she is so good looking. I think see has a lot of dates with AFC's who lose it within a few dates because she is cool and good looking. I never said to her, "Wow XXXX, you are so beautiful, how come you are still single?" YUCK! I did say while in bed with her that she is very senusal. She loved that one. I know that if I don't call or email for a few days she eventually contacts me about a date idea that we talked about prior. I know action speaks louder than words, but I'm still confused here, because I still have a little latent AFC in me. Any DJ idea that I can use to expolre her IL with out directly doing the AFC "Do you like me?" or "Where do you see this going?" Man, those words will never flow out of my mouth again. I never asked her that BTW. I basically want to fish without fishing. Or as they say in the Tao, "Do, by not doing."

I don't want to be so passive here that she loses interest. However, I don't want to be needy. I'm worried about her saying no by the way. I have no problem getting dates. I don't want top be reactive, or passive. Just figuring out a proactive way to see her IL.

SD

 

[cffrmw]

imo, i would schedule another date with her, talk about an awesome date you guys could so some other time (something way fun) and then when she calls about it tell her you can't cause you have another date whenever she wants to do it. then see how she reacts because if she wants to go exclusive you should be able to tell. if she seems really hurt you might want to supplicate and tell her you'll reschedule (i know it seems kind of afc but if she's showing interest you have to decide if it's more likely for her to lose interest by you supplicating or by not appearing interested). so... good job so far good luck from here on out

 

[So pimp its scary]

I like cffrmw's advice, except that I would be weary of telling this girl that you have a DATe with another girl... rather, just tell her you can't make it because your work called you to cover for them that day, or something else that would be believable.

And this is only to guage her reaction, and nothing more.

Even though, it seems that she does have good IL.

 

[Steelie Dan]

I agree with you both. I don't want to say anything about another date. Because on or first date she told me that she was trying tio figure out if I was a player or not. So I'll just use the work excuse, or some other excuse. I have to tell you, I did not know this when I asked her out, but it turns out we have a mutual friend. This woman who I helped out a few uears back. Thank god I was an AFC back then, because although she was hot, I never made any move. I was jsut a nice guy. This woman told my date that I was the only guy who talked to her as if she was an adult. I was 38 and she was 19 then. And she was HB9. Some things from your past are good. This woma just paid me back for my help years ago when she was having problems with her man....