squirrels
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 15, 2003
- Messages
- 6,620
- Reaction score
- 182
- Age
- 45
I was probably one of the bigger "losers" back in my school days. Before I discovered these PUA websites and the like, I had NEVER been on a date. Women constantly rejected me. Even my friends determined I would never be with an attractive woman romantically.
Now, even when I'm getting a decent smattering of women in my life, I still take women very personally. Every woman I date, hook up with, etc, I want her to think of me as one of the best things to ever happen in her life. It's gotten to where it's not enough to just "have done it"...I want prestige. I want to be the guy all the women want.
Like I said in another thread, even if we break up, I want to see her 5 years down the road with her husband, and have her look at me with those eyes like, "I wish he was you". I cannot stand the thought of being expendable to a woman...it REALLY cuts me to find out that a woman I've been dating and am really starting to like has just broken contact because "they've found someone they like better".
I can't help but think that when a girl responds to me with anything less than interest and enthusiasm, it's an indicator that I've failed somehow...that there's something I haven't grasped yet about "the game". I feel like when that crap happens, I'm somehow getting "played". And it's hard for me to think of myself as "the great catch" when I seem to be on the "catch and release" program for women.
Does it indicate something wrong with ME for me to feel this way? Is it wrong for me to want to dominate women's thoughts and feelings like that? To outclass every other male out there and have all the women, especially the one I select, feel privileged to be with me?
Does this somehow indicate a lack of self-esteem? Am I putting too much focus on what THEY think?
Now, even when I'm getting a decent smattering of women in my life, I still take women very personally. Every woman I date, hook up with, etc, I want her to think of me as one of the best things to ever happen in her life. It's gotten to where it's not enough to just "have done it"...I want prestige. I want to be the guy all the women want.
Like I said in another thread, even if we break up, I want to see her 5 years down the road with her husband, and have her look at me with those eyes like, "I wish he was you". I cannot stand the thought of being expendable to a woman...it REALLY cuts me to find out that a woman I've been dating and am really starting to like has just broken contact because "they've found someone they like better".
I can't help but think that when a girl responds to me with anything less than interest and enthusiasm, it's an indicator that I've failed somehow...that there's something I haven't grasped yet about "the game". I feel like when that crap happens, I'm somehow getting "played". And it's hard for me to think of myself as "the great catch" when I seem to be on the "catch and release" program for women.
Does it indicate something wrong with ME for me to feel this way? Is it wrong for me to want to dominate women's thoughts and feelings like that? To outclass every other male out there and have all the women, especially the one I select, feel privileged to be with me?
Does this somehow indicate a lack of self-esteem? Am I putting too much focus on what THEY think?