Hey guys, got some things I need to get off my chest. I recently got out of a an LTR. I've done this before, I know how to handle it, and I know that I'll be fine. But truth be told this one is by far the hardest I've had to deal with yet. Reason being is that I was "there," mentally I was prepared to live my life with this woman. I thought the world of her, had an insane connection with her, and generally was madly in love. Long story short, she ended the relationship a week ago.
I've since learned that she's been sleeping with her ex since the night after we broke up, and just last night had a ONS with a random. I guess the sad part right now is that I'm learning this girl isn't the person I thought she was. Perhaps I have been tricking myself, and making her out to be someone that she wasn't. But I really didn't think she was capable of behaving this way - I was wrong.
I'm feeling quite frustrated right now, because although she did have her flaws, she was (or at least I thought) what I want out of a woman long term. There are a lot of things I love about her that are going to make it very hard for any women I meet in the future to obtain any kind of commitment from me.
Most guys on this site are here because they just want to bang a bunch of hot broads. And I get it, that's fine. But I feel like I've been there done that. I know that I want to have a meaningful relationship with someone. A relationship where there is mutual respect and admiration. I want a wife, and a family; for me finding someone to have that with (genuinely have a good relationship with that can last a lifetime) is what I want out of life. I'm now becoming increasingly less hopeful that I will ever find someone to have this with.
The abrupt realization that my girlfriend for the past 2 years isn't the person I thought she was has rocked me. It has caused me to question if "good" women even exist anymore. We live in a time where people don't have any respect for themselves, their bodies, or the impact things may have on themselves/future partners and their lives. I realize there is often a double standard - but I am well aware that this happens across the board for men and women.
As I re-enter the field I find myself questioning if I should take a hard look at what I want out of life, and try to seek it honestly. Maybe banging a bunch of hot broads this time I'm single isn't what I should be doing. I'm very certain of what I want out of a partner, and I know it will be hard to find - even more so one that hasn't completely thrown her self respect to the wind at some point in her life.
I'm at the point where I have no faith in women, or humanity in general. I almost don't believe there are truly good women out there, and if there are it is quite likely that they will not fit into the standards that I would be willing to accept.
I guess my question is do you believe there are still good women out there? Is it even worth trying to pursue ? I have no trouble getting laid any day of the week if that is what I want. But now I want more, and I feel strongly that it will be next to impossible to find.
I have two options at this point that I see as realistic. I can try to be what I'm looking for (read: NOT sleep around) and spend some time, once I've gotten over this one, looking for someone I would actually want to spend my life with in an honest way. OR I could completely give up hope on that dream, and just "have fun." I honestly see being a bachelor forever as a feasible option at this point, and make sure to never keep a woman around for more than a couple months. I feel like the second option would be selling myself short, but as it stands right now I have little faith that I will ever be able to find someone to fit within the incredibly high standards I have.
Thoughts?
