DJs ONLY PLEASE: Out of ur league experience

[Don_Marko]

Yes out of ur league is an AFC thing to say and feel, yet the truth is that's how I felt at times, in the end this is what ****ed me up however I honestly never met a woman like her.

HER:

• candidate in federal elections
• has a great job, surely makes a lot of $$$ and i'm still in university, workign summers for about min wage and have $h!t load of debt
• 6 years older than me
• Political, business and artistic ambitions.
• She actually sings and songwrites ( I got her to sing a song that she wrote)
• drinks tequila faster than me
• Has huge ambitions, I got some of my own but not like hers

I'll just list pros and cons of the situation instead of gong trough enitre story.

Pros:

• I put on textbook C&F to get the date with her
• she laughed pretty much the enitre hour we spent toghter
• Excellent intellectual convo, where we challenged one another
• Plenty of social proof, as we went out to the place where I work, which has a great atmosphere and enough people stoped by to pay respects

Cons:

• She was impressed by my boldness and directness to ask for date, yet I didn't try anything sexual with her. We only spent an hour togheter. I was so mind blown by her that I totally forgot! If i put on a closing move for a kiss, I probabbly would have gotten rejected but she'd have much more respect for my balls.
• My outfit. I had my pimpin' dress shirt on over a sweater, however I totally forgot to take the sweater off so I looked like a father's day billboard
• I ask her for a second date on the spot. She tells me two things:
  1) She doesn't invest time with people unless she's sure of them. (UNDERSTANDABLE) This was probabbly a test, I failed it. I should have said something like: slow down I just wanna give you a second chance, not trying to get involved or anything.... I didn't.
  2) She has my email, if she wants to she'll email me. (she worded it nicer, but that's the message I got)
  

OK I have a feeling all is not lost. My idea is to wait untill next wensday (6 days from now) and ask her to do something fun (meaning I'll think of something fun for us to do) over the weekend. She spends a lot of time chasing her dreams that she doesn't have much of a social life plus she's new in town! So if I make a good pitch chances are she'll go for it (60 - 70% In my opinion)

I need advice from men that have conqured such women in past about how to handle the situation, at this point nailing her would mean more to me than having an orgy with entire cheerleading squad.

 

[OpenMind]

This one is just as simple as any other chick.... take her off the pedistal that you have put her on, and stop thinking that she is the greatest thing since wonder woman. Go back and read your post again and then in your head think the exact opposite from the way you are thinking about her now.. She should be lucky that you spend time with her and if she plays her cards right she might even be lucky to make it to round two...

 

[Don_Marko]

Originally posted by OpenMind
This one is just as simple as any other chick.... take her off the pedistal that you have put her on, and stop thinking that she is the greatest thing since wonder woman. Go back and read your post again and then in your head think the exact opposite from the way you are thinking about her now.. She should be lucky that you spend time with her and if she plays her cards right she might even be lucky to make it to round two...

But if she was just any other chick then I wouldn't want to go out with her. I don't want a LTR or even a casual one... I just want to have her ONCE.

 

[OpenMind]

My advice still applies...

 

[Don_Marko]

It does... I shouldn't SHOW that I think she's better than most women.

What do you think specifically can be done about damage control

 

[AlwaysExcel]

Don Marko, I really respect and appreciate the advice you've given me in the past. While I'm not the master DJ yet, I just want to say that I've been learning that a couple AFC moves don't necessarily torpedo the situation. I've found myself obsessing over a few flaws and becoming worried even though the rest of my game was tight and the night was successful.

The only real con I see is you asking her out again on the first date. Not being sexual isn't always a bad thing. I've gotten women to become very aggressive by not touching them. You just don't want to continue to act physically asexual. Your clothes aren't that big of deal as long as you aren't always pimpin the dad style. I think it's more impressive if you can straight mack in whatever you're wearing and aren't all self conscious while doing it.

I think your plan is good. Act like her initial response to a second date proposal didn't happen. You can use your C&F response if she throws up another obstacle when you ask her out.

 

[Grey Fox]

You now the reason why she was impressed by your directness is because most guys will be intimidated by a woman like her. That whole line about about not dating unless she is sure of them is a test to see if you will be bold enough to ask her out again. If she spits that line back at you just come on back to her say "Well what life without a little risk?" Seriously just go out to have fun. She is probably so caught up in this world of perfection and power that she probably hasn't had a good time in ages. What makes you unquie from other guys is that your not after her for power or money. Thats a plus, if you can show her a good time where she can be carefree even better. If you can understand why she acts the way she does and pay attention to those little details and do things subtly that singal you meet her needs she'll fall for you. Then when she starts to move closer to you in the emotional sense, playfully back up a little and then move foward again. Different women require different tactics I suppose, if you were to try playing games she has probably seen enough to tired of it. Instead be more subtle and don't play the obivious games DJs normally have to play with normal women.

-Grey Fox

 

[chicksrock]

In a similar situation with my HB25; i played it to my advantage

I said to myself fvck! i've got nothing to lose ... JUST GO FOR IT!!
I became overly charming

1)I kinoed her like a b*tch
2)made her as horny as i could
3)Acted i was the coolest sh*t on the planet
ACT LIKE YOU ARE HER SOUL MATE AS WELL
do all things at the same time!

GOOD LUCK!

 

[Evil-Rom]

Originally posted by chicksrock
In a similar situation with my HB25

HB25?

You sure that pedestal is high enough for her?

 

[chicksrock]

heehehe no
i mean shes 25 years old!

in classification i'd put her a HB7.5

 

[Dirtheart]

I know we're not supposed to think anyone is out of our league, but I do know the feeling. It's psychological and the way I've started getting round it is by not comparing qualities directly.

I used to think like this:

She's stunning looking - I'm good looking but not stunning
She has a good job - I'm a student
She has her own home - I'm living in my parents' home
She has travelled the world - I never left my city for 3 years

And so on...

Obviously when you think like that, you wonder what she could see in you. But nowadays I don't evaluate myself according to social expectations or material possessions any more, but on my own achievements and abilities. A lot of women are really impressed by this. Those who are not are probably very superficial.

 

[phenom]

I'm like Dirtheart; I'm in my late 20's and I don't believe that any girl is out of my league. It's something that comes with age really. Your only 20 (I think) so I can understand how you feel. Remember that she is not out of your league per say but that you two are in different stages of your lives. She's 6 years older than you? If she has a good job now then that means that she was in college at 20 also (like yourself) so she should understand. Just keep working to be a better man so when you are 26 you'll have a great job like her and girls will think you are out of their league.

I remember back to freshman & sophomore year in high school and think of all the hot junior & senior girls that I thought were out of my league just because they were older. Since then I've run into several of them and have ****ed them silly and I can't believe I put them on a pedestal back then. With age comes wisdom.

 

[Soma]

If you have the nagging feeling that a girl is out of your league, then yup, she IS out of your league. You know it, you just may not want to admit it to yourself.

In your situation, you said you want her once. I assume you want one phuck and you'll be satisfied. If that's the case, there is hope! You CAN get a girl out of your league, for a night, if you play your cards right. You WON'T keep her. As soon as she realizes she's "above" you, she'll drop you.

If you want the sexxor, then do what you were doing. You were on the right track. Be direct. After you have the attraction, work on the rapport, then transition into getting her horny, put the moves on her, and bam...it's all good. Just don't get attached! Cause she IS going to drop you when she realizes you're not in her league.

 

[Spike_the_cowboy]

A woman is only superior to you if you THINK that she is superior to you. There is no such thing as a woman who is "out of your league". Thats AFC talk and you know it. You said it yourself. Work on your attitude. Dont' just act like a man, be one.

 

[Soma]

Wow, Spike and I just do not see eye to eye on things, haha.

Here's my take on the way it is.

It's good and dandy to think happy thoughts like "no woman is out of your league" but the truth is many girls ARE out of your league (When I say "your" I'm speaking about all men). That's the cold hard truth and no amount of self-affirmations, pleasant ideals, or positive-sounding rhetoric will change that. That's the bad news. But there IS good news. The good news is this:

It's doesn't have to stay this way. You can change. You can grow intellectually, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. And the more you grow, the closer you get to being in that once "unnattainable" woman's league, eventually reaching it and surpassing it. If you grow enough you may so be so far out of HER league that she will be nervous around YOU.

You need experience and the confidence that comes with that experience in order keep those high-calibre women. So work on yourself...live an interesting, exciting, enriching life by doing things you would not normally do. Take public speaking classes, go to the gym, take up boxing/martial arts/wrestling, go skydiving, rockclimbing, learn to play an instrument, learn a new language, practice yoga, travel, scuba dive, etc., etc..and of course meet many people and interact with them, men and women. When you're the type of person that has this going on their life the HB's will naturally be attracted to you and will WANT to be with you.

Of course, you can fake all this if you're good at deceiving people and yeah, you can get the girl and keep her with you. But you'll lose yourself in the process. You'll feel good at first but soon you'll start to rely on the validation of attractive women to boost your self-esteem and you'll start to feel like shiet and wonder "What the phuck has happened to me? Who have I become?". If you don't recognize this you may just feel hollow and NEVER figure out what is up. Bleh! I've been down that path and I don't plan on ever going back.

Word.

-Soma

 

[Spike_the_cowboy]

Settle for less? -- I don't think so.

Soma, get over yourself. I didn't even read your posts until just now. My post was directed to Don_Marko. Anyways, what you are saying here has no real context to the situation unless you are telling him to settle for less! I see what you are trying to say, Soma, but you are saying it in the wrong place, at the wrong time, and entirely in the wrong fashion.

I stand by my statements.

 

[Soma]

haha you big goober! I was pointing out that you and I see things differently. ;p

Settle for less? That's silly.

 

[mrbrooklyn]

I read both sosuave and Masf, and Tyler durden, their version of the Messiah talks about living in LA with all these hot girls and if he was still in his afc days he would think he was out of their league, but with the PUA or DJ knowledge he has flipped it on these girls.

He talks about how the beutiful ones are sometimes the dumbest, so it shouldn't be hard to convey higer social value by using your brain. I am not talking about showing her you computer program, instead I am talking about being that cool guy that Soma described in his post.

I think the best thing an aspiring DJ can do is meet and befriend cool guys. If you can get cool guys to want to hang out with you then youre social proof will rise infinately. Also cool guys usually know a lot of girls. Hot girls want to meet cool guys, if you are in that cool guy circle then you will convey high social value to the broad. Don't be afraid to be mixed in with the player crowd. Girls love complaining abou certain groups of guys being players when in fact they know that when the club shuts down and they are horny it is the players that they will call for that booty call.

 

[Soma]

I agree Brook, the challenge is that most cool guys won't want a dork hanging with them (general statement, not directed at anyone) so the guy will have to have some level of coolness himself. I suppose it's possible, though ,that you can ask for help and they may take you in under their wing. From what I remember, that's what David Deangelo did.

-Soma

 

[Don_Marko]

WOW great advice... thank you.

I realized myself Spike's comment (A woman is only superior to you if you THINK that she is superior to you) too late.... it's all in your head after all.

I completely agree with Soma as well, however you talk about improvement in future and I thank you for those well meaning comments. What I needed was an ACE up my sleeve to pull out in the present i.e. during the date, however I was too suprised by her to use cool reason. Anyways you live and learn, I still think I did OK although tons of room for improvement! (On a side note I do many of the things you suggested... skydiving is booked for july and I'm looking to start Muay Thai real soon)

For list that chicksrock put up:
1)I kinoed her like a b*tch
2)made her as horny as i could
3)Acted i was the coolest sh*t on the planet
ACT LIKE YOU ARE HER SOUL MATE AS WELL
do all things at the same time)
I wouldn't use that on this girl, if I did something like this to her she would have laughed at my face, as she's incredibly smart. However surely it works on dumber girls or girls that want a bone real bad, unfortunately she was neither.

AlwaysExcel respect!

And finally for what Grey Fox posted, about showing her good time where she can forget about everything, that is exacly what gives me hope that I might get a second chance, I know for a fact that she's not looking for a boyfriend, as this girl has so much going on in her life that she doesn't really want or need one. Yet as every DJ ought to know that's precisely what makes her so attractive...