DJBC - WEEK 7 - All groups

[Al Moh.]

"I do realize I am a little late with this one. Turns out HBK is the last one to continue the BC, congratz to you, I hope you'll do the rest of it. his one is just for you "

You'll have THREE WEEKS for this one!




Now, it's your responsibility to complete every week on time. You have to:
- Do the reading
- Complete the exercises
- Write a Report at the end of the week
You may:
- Listen to the music (recommended to get into the mood )
- Report any time during the week in this thread
- Ask questions in this thread
- Give tips in this thread or a thread of the other BC-Groups
If you learn anything new that you think is valuable to others, you are encouraged to post this inside the Tips-Section.

In your Report at the end of the week please state if you were successful completing the week or not. If yes, I am going to move your name to the next week. If no you can either stop or give yourself more time. However, I am not going to take care of you anymore in terms of moving you name further. You have to organise yourself then but can still use this thread.

Each week starts on thursday morning and ends on wednesday evening. Use your local time.

That's about it as general information goes.

The link to the BC one more time:

http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/Downloads/djbc.pdf
or word Version:
http://www.jbspencer.com/djb/Downloads/djbc.doc

There you will find each weeks reading material, music picks and exercises. I am just going to repeat the exercises in short form in this threads.



1) Arrange a third date.
2) Try out new strategies discussed in the reading section to increase IL
3) Keep your number pool at ten or more



Good luck!

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Week 7 !

I did not think this week had started ! Thanks for the heads up Al Moh. I'm confident Phat will catch up very soon. Maybe RD too.

Third date should not be to hard. I have one girl from last week who I've had a second date with and one from the previous week who wants to go on the second this week.

Anyway I have 6 numbers so once it gets dark I'm heading out. As a side effect of having so many options I feel a little less motivated at getting numbers but then again I don't feel any anxiety. At this point it would hardly bother me if I got rejected all night. It should be interesting too see which of these effects has a greater influence tonight.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Date #2 from HB8

Update: Number pool is up to 11~

Update two: At 3:30 I'm going to see Batman with the HB 8 from two weeks ago (I've already seen it but what the hell.) We finally have a day where we both are not busy.I kissed closed her week 5 so it should be fine. We're going to her place for dinner after the movie so around 6ish. She kind of hinted she was cooking but I'm sure she'll get takeout.

My date #3 with the new girl is on Friday at 5:00.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Went out and got a couple hours with my wing (last appearance week 3) next date is either Monday or Tuesday. I'll write my two short reports on my dates in the morning !

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Ok date 1 which was last Wednesday.

It was an interesting date. HB 8 and I were meeting at the theatre but she called me up early. She said since the rain had stopped she was walking because she loves that kind of weather. Anyway she was near the curb and a driver who was driving a little too close splashed her. She sounded like it was the end of the world. Lol.

Anyway she said she was still coming but we had to go to American Eagle (where she works) so that she can buy new clothes. I was sitting in Tim Horton’s (this is all part of a huge mall complex) sipping coffee when she bursts in with soaking hair, a ribbon barely hanging from it and a black miniskirt. She had a funny pair of socks on and they looked wet. Some girl was staring at her and she gave the girl her ribbon. Then she came over and drank down all my coffee (black) in a single go. I don't know about anyone else but I found it really hot. I asked her if she was sure she did not fall in a lake and she said she would beat me up for that when I least expect it.

Anyway we went to AE but she didn't find clothes she liked. So we went around the mall and stopped at some store. I can't remember the name but she said it was a popular one. She tried on a bunch of outfits for me. I remember at one point she had a pair of jeans and asked if her butt looked fat. I asked her if I looked stupid enough to answer that and shoved her back in. Eventually she decided on a skirt and top which was about 40$ total. Although she tried on a two piece for me at one point we missed the batman time. We basically wondered around for two hours until the next time.

During the movie I pretended I hadn't seen it just for kicks although it was good the second time around. I said one or two words at certain scenes ("there are too many windows...") and her expression was hilarious.

After it was over we walked to her place and as I predicted, she got takeout (she threatened me with a salad when I busted her balls on that.) After this stage I'm not that great at transitioning to make out so I tried to use the DJBC tip (article 2) although I was at her place. After dinner I asked for a tour and we stopped in her room. She had a bunch of magazines but nothing like the article said. I was suddenly really nervous but I sucked it up and sat on her bed and grabbed a magazine. The first one looks pretty banal and I was so ready to play truth or dare lol. But she told me that one was boring and tossed me a "Cosmopolitan." I swear the whole thing was about sex. I just kept looking back at her and the book grinning and she looked at me weird. I told her there's no way she could do half the things in this magazine. I've never heard a more arrogant scoff.

Anyway we're both on her bed and she asks me if I'm going to disappear after she kisses me this time. She then starts ranting about what she'll do to me if I do that again and after I realize she's not going to shut up I start rubbing her back. She's still throwing threats at me while I smell her neck. She turns around and reaches her hand down and I think I'm in but she pinches my thigh pretty hard. We had something of a wrestling match after that but being close to a foot less (and probably 60 pounds) than me I had a little advantage. Eventually her feet are tied up with mine, I have her wrists in one hand and I tickle her and she laughs like crazy. I ask her what she's going to do now. She kisses me. She gives me tongue so I give some back and she takes it in her teeth and gives me a threatening look. I let go of her hands right away. She put one of my hands on her back and one on the side of her head. It was really funny. After that I kissed her neck, bit her earlobe and the rest is history. =)

My Friday date was a lot less eventful but I'll post it anyway. I think I know who I'm going out with. This girl's confidence is magnetic. Date 3 is tomorrow.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Ah that was a great breakfast, now for my next report.

Friday.

As I mentioned last week, I pretty much got this date from being available. The negative to last week's bootcamp was because of how little resistance there was I did not have as much time as I would like to demonstrate my personality. Because of that I felt my looks had influence on why I got so far with her.

Anyway, I take the metro to her place. When I get back on the street, I see an icecream truck serving kids and since it's hot I make a mental note. I go to her place 5 minutes late and she is not outside yet. For a moment I considered just cutting it off because I have my date with HB 8 on Tuesday. But about five minutes later I call her and tell her to come out. When she sees me she smiled she hugs me (is this the right response after last week?)

She asks me what I want to do and I tell her before we get something to eat I saw an ice cream truck and I would kill for some. We went to find it but it left. She said there are a couple ice cream places on Bloor St. so we take the metro talking the whole time. I get something that looks like a McFlurry with cookies and she gets the same thing. She looks through her purse but I pay for it.

Anyway, she feels like something "exotic" so we start walking to China town. She a lot more quiet than AE girl. We pass a music store and she asks if we can go in. I say sure and we look at some cds. I wonder downstairs where they have all these records and a record player. I found one of Bell Biv Devoe (!!), the police and a couple other cool ones. I didn't notice HB came down too. We wondered around a bit which was basically me showing her records. I saw one section that said "50 cent" but that can't be right can it?

Anyway we left without buying anything and then walked down. Halfway there she said someone got shot on this street and I think I said "cool." I was a bit out of it. Anyway we decide on this korean place. We have some kind of soup thing and they give us a ton of appetizers. I have no idea what half the stuff were but they were tasty. We talked about a lot of stuff but I do not really remember anything specific. After she said she only had 20's so she insisted on paying equally. While we're walking back she's holding my hand with both her arms and her head is kind of resting on my shoulder. We get back around 10. Thing is when we're back she says she has to get up really early tomarrow for work but she wants to see me again sometime next week saying she's only busy on Wednesday. She kisses me briefly on the lips and then says bye.

Maybe she thinks she came on too strong last week? Maybe her attraction faded a bit? Maybe she really has an work?

Well whatever, if I have nothing else to do I'll call her up. She seemed nervous so I'll assume for now it's from coming on too strong last week.

 

[rushing dude 123]

Hey man great work, U and AE girl seem to really b hitting it off, bet ur glad on hitting work staff now lol. Has for the someone got shot on the street and u said "cool", haha i won't comment on that, even though u were probably trying to move on to a more positive subject. Ur progress seems to of increased in a lot more on ur quality, whilst quantity was improved on the more early weeks. I am reading ur dates and i am actually enjoying the story, which i usually don't do. 1 more week left for u man, glad u kept in there.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Week 7 is over !

Hey man great work, U and AE girl seem to really b hitting it off, bet ur glad on hitting work staff now lol. Has for the someone got shot on the street and u said "cool", haha i won't comment on that, even though u were probably trying to move on to a more positive subject. Ur progress seems to of increased in a lot more on ur quality, whilst quantity was improved on the more early weeks. I am reading ur dates and i am actually enjoying the story, which i usually don't do. 1 more week left for u man, glad u kept in there.

Hey RD, glad too see you're still in it. I like your journal but 100 numbers in one day sounds insane ! When you finish that you should do an audio course.

And you're right about hitting on the staff, it is very much your fault I am going out with her in the first place so thanks again for that. Glad you like my reports by the way, I'm a bit of an introvert so I like to be a little more outgoing than I comfortable. It tends to spice things up. =)


Oh and Date number three

This was not that as funny as some of my others but fun nevertheless... I got to her place around 11 and we went out to a nightclub. Apparently when I was in the washroom some guy offered her drinks and she told him he won't get lucky tonight but he bought her two anyway and left. I took a sip and let her have both (it was one of those chick drinks with layers and I could not bring myself to finish it -- plus she handles alcohol well.) She told me if I want something neat we could goto the cougar bar (it is called "Crocodile Rock") and she would pimp me out. I declined politely.

After that we "danced" for a little while but mostly chilled in the back. She was really big on the kino and nice shoulder and neck massage. AE then smirked and told me I have to return the favor. Not one too miss an easy transition (I did not want to use the DJCB's magazine transition again) I told her she might want to lie down for this so we should go back to her place.

She had massage oil so I told her to lie on her stomach and I gave her a full body one. I was a little rough but I found it not only sensual but very amusing because I could practically see the ****iness melting right out of her as she started becoming from feminine (wrong choice of words? Normally she's kind of tom-boyish/****y but she's hilarious.) I'd push down a little harder or use my knuckles and she'd hold her breath and tense up and then relax more.

After that she could barely move at all and dozed off. I being so smooth tucked her in and went to go read the "oddly enough" section of Reuters online at around 2am (Once upon a midnight dreary, while I pondered, weak and weary...) Around 2:30 my shoulder gets touched (While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping) and she's standing behind me ("'Tis some visitor," I muttered, "tapping at my arm so sore.) I remember smiling at her at her and she pointed to the bed with a deadpan look and told me to strip (she muttered to me it's time to score, only this and nothing more.) I hope my dabbling into poetic parody was enjoyable because I am ending it here. (clothes on your body, what a bore, quoth AE girl "nevermore !")

In the morning I made breakfast (omlettes) and after watching tv for an hour I left. I'm going to call her in a couple hours.

Anyway I have satisfied ALL conditions for week 7 and I believe it is now time for the grand finale. As I'm sure it's plainly obivous by my butchering of "The Raven" I have nothing to do today so I think I will just go read. After these past few weeks I could not care less how terrible my poetry is. =)

Cannot wait for week 8 !

 

[rushing dude 123]

haha i clicked the hyperlink dam ur smooth lol. Yeh man I still need lot of work, but i am doing something about it, thats a start. I am tired and hungry now so i am going to go bed soon, but just wanted to see how u were getting along and I am looking forward to seeing u go for week 8 man.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Haha awesome. Going out tonight to pick up a few numbers.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Alright, I rolled with Lex (see #4) and three of his pivots last night and since we're helping to get girls for a friends birthday (at a club) on the 15th, we've been getting groups of numbers at a time. Twenty something RSVP'd yesterday so we're feeling pretty good. The birthday guy is pretty shy so he is very excited. Having a couple of HB's come with really helps. It's not really my game style but Lex is awesome with groups. He goes in, disarms obstacles, merges them with other sets and they're fighting over him. I'm not bad at it at all but he has it down to a science. Him and I go and approach two different groups with false time constraints and if it clicks we game them for a while and then to join I would for example ask if they've seen Lex, describe him, give him a little social proof concerning cool stuff he's done and what not then he'll call out to me and we'll merge groups. It's hilarious because his girls will assume I'm with the girls of my group and mine will do the same to him so then we'll switch which is easy because we both social proofed each other earlier.

If the groups were mixed company (we tried to approach the ones with the most girls but sometimes it is not so easy) then when our pivots come (and social proof us again) one will chat up the guys (and get way too many free drinks) while the other two help me out (Other than when I'm with Lex I hardly use this "mystery" group dynamics stuff so I'm still learning. They basically just kino a lot so the other girls do it too. I went to high school with one of them so we are pretty good friends.)

Anyway my pool of numbers just became a bottomless well. I am going to try to arranged a date with AE girl Friday if possible. Maybe the other girl too, I have not made my mind up yet.

Week 8 should be interesting.

 

[Quiksilver]

Congrats HBK, sounds like you're rolling on momentum now. There's one thing that you're doing that I think is worth mentioning again. I didn't learn how to do this until it was too late, and I kept making this mistake over and over for months:

Say you go out and get 100 numbers over the course of a week. Out of those, you may get 5-10 dates, of those days you'll likely get 3-5 second dates, and from there perhaps 2-3 relationships.

Now that you are busy developing a relationship past 2nd & 3rd dates, you mentioned that you've lost the drive to go out and get more numbers. The mistake I made is NOT going out and meeting new people. I got complacent when I landed a girlfriend and another girl on the side. Suddenly when 'girl on the side' found a real boyfriend I was left with only miss girlfriend. Suddenly my behavior changed around her and I was struggling to hold on to her due to my inexperience(I've beaten that some, but still no relationship expert lol).

It's worth noting that Even after you have a steady relationship and a couple plates spinning on the side, that it's ESSENTIAL to keep actively pursuing other women. Picture a pond. Water flows into the pond, and water flows out. When water stops flowing in, the pond dries up, or the water gets stagnant and dirty, and eventually dries up. You should always have positive flow in your dating life, meaning that regardless of whether you're "taken" it always helps to keep more girls on the side. Even if its just going out and attracting girls but never following up on them, it helps to keep that momentum of getting dates.. It not only increases your options, itll also make you more attractive to your girlfriend, knowing that your social value(Mystery called it replication value, but they're actually the same thing in practice) is always high and that you always have other options.

Aside from that, good stuff HBK... I'm really considering jumping back into this game as well.

You're in Toronto right?

 

[Heart Break Kid]

Congrats HBK, sounds like you're rolling on momentum now. There's one thing that you're doing that I think is worth mentioning again. I didn't learn how to do this until it was too late, and I kept making this mistake over and over for months:

Say you go out and get 100 numbers over the course of a week. Out of those, you may get 5-10 dates, of those days you'll likely get 3-5 second dates, and from there perhaps 2-3 relationships.

Now that you are busy developing a relationship past 2nd & 3rd dates, you mentioned that you've lost the drive to go out and get more numbers. The mistake I made is NOT going out and meeting new people. I got complacent when I landed a girlfriend and another girl on the side. Suddenly when 'girl on the side' found a real boyfriend I was left with only miss girlfriend. Suddenly my behavior changed around her and I was struggling to hold on to her due to my inexperience(I've beaten that some, but still no relationship expert lol).

It's worth noting that Even after you have a steady relationship and a couple plates spinning on the side, that it's ESSENTIAL to keep actively pursuing other women. Picture a pond. Water flows into the pond, and water flows out. When water stops flowing in, the pond dries up, or the water gets stagnant and dirty, and eventually dries up. You should always have positive flow in your dating life, meaning that regardless of whether you're "taken" it always helps to keep more girls on the side. Even if its just going out and attracting girls but never following up on them, it helps to keep that momentum of getting dates.. It not only increases your options, itll also make you more attractive to your girlfriend, knowing that your social value(Mystery called it replication value, but they're actually the same thing in practice) is always high and that you always have other options.

Aside from that, good stuff HBK... I'm really considering jumping back into this game as well.

You're in Toronto right?

Hey Quik, thanks for the feedback. All of my approaches so far have been done in Toronto, yes. I have done a couple in Montreal too which has terrific nightlife.

I can already see the reality of what you said, the other girl I had on the side seems like she wants a more serious relationship and I can tell she will probably get it soon. It is very important to keep approaching -- knowing us DJ's have other options really improves the dynamic of the relationship. I was really just approaching for the bootcamp but now that I think about it, it is a lot of fun anyway. Oh and Quik since you're an Aussie now I highly suggest you put that beach to good work ! Toronto is feeling raining like Vancouver this year so do it for me !

 

[rushing dude 123]

Awesome i am here, keep pool at 10 and 3rd dates in 3 weeks, hm i cud handle that. I am starting monday, so tommorows can read some of the new articles, which should b interesting seeing i promised not to look at them till i am here.

 

[rushing dude 123]

I did one 3rd date, so got the minimum requirements for that. I am going to get my plates back to 10 and move on to week 8, i have kind of took a backward step at moment, but ill get there.

 

[rushing dude 123]

RD update:

I went on another 3rd date with another girl and my plates cut down to 6 now. i went outby myself tonight my aa was up no approaches , i can't always rely on rings to get me in mood, its like i reply on someone to b with me even if they don't approach themselves. seriously got to snap myself out of this. I am thinking stupid saying things like "i can't approach today i got a date" or "i can't approach till i am at the club" saying things like this to myself is afc and i already lost. I will get back in state. Still have week and bit for this task to get my plates to 10. I will try to get the last numbers alone with no wings watching me, so i am ready for week 8's task. I use to b good by myself, but i got used to the routine of a wing.

 

[Heart Break Kid]

RD update:

I went on another 3rd date with another girl and my plates cut down to 6 now. i went outby myself tonight my aa was up no approaches , i can't always rely on rings to get me in mood, its like i reply on someone to b with me even if they don't approach themselves. seriously got to snap myself out of this. I am thinking stupid saying things like "i can't approach today i got a date" or "i can't approach till i am at the club" saying things like this to myself is afc and i already lost. I will get back in state. Still have week and bit for this task to get my plates to 10. I will try to get the last numbers alone with no wings watching me, so i am ready for week 8's task. I use to b good by myself, but i got used to the routine of a wing.

I am guilty of this sometimes. I'll tell myself I'll only approach when I'm at x or I have a date so why talk to her. It is old advice but I find the best thing for it is the 3 second rule, I see a girl I like and I just approach. I also relied on a wing for groups so week 8 was no easy task once I was out on my own. However we get after every approach and soon it is a piece of cake. =)

Do you have a current theory you are putting into practice RD? I remember you were trying a couple in your approach journal and I am curious as to what it has evolved into. Congrats on date 3 by the way !