DJ Woman Wannabe

cruzy

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Currently have 1 FB in town and 2 out of town. Met a guy online and was hoping to have 2nd FB. We met at a coffee shop and then went back to my place. The sex was awkward, but I usually give guys a second chance because it changes. Saw him a couple days later and sex was a 8.5. Then I saw him a few days later and the sex remained an 8.5, which I am fine with.

With my other in-town FB, we don't cuddle and I'm not too into his kissing so I don't get attached. For you playas out there, the way to get a woman attached is to cuddle afterwards. I would try to kick him out nicely and he would say that he would leave in a half hour and cuddle. The first night he said I was really mean and I had to hand him his clothes. I tried to keep detached, but because of the fact that he stayed, cuddled and opened up, I felt drawn in.

After 3 times, he did not contact me for like 4 days and remained invisible online on purpose (in the past, he was online most nights because we talked online a lot before we met) I played too by also remaining invisible I hate to admit. Finally I broke down and showed myself as visible. He then showed himself as visible and contacted me to see if I wanted to hang out the next day. I told him that I wasn't sure because I expect a guy to contact me the next day to say they had a good time (unless it's a ONS) and then he said that he wouldn't beg so I said okay, I had fun, goodbye.

Then a few minutes later he IM'ed me and apologized, etc, and so I hung out with him again. Things were fine and we also hung out again a few days later. Then, instead of just leaving, he stayed over and I felt really awkward due to attachment issues. Then he ended up leaving in the middle of the night without turning the light on, which confirmed my opinion that I should ask the guy to leave before the light turns off.

Then, the next day we had discussed seeing a movie in the afternoon, but I had plans later in the evening. He Im'ed me in the evening wondering if we were going to see the movie so I Im'ed him later when I came back. He totally ignored my IM and remained invisible for a couple of days. I called his cell left a message saying hello to see what was up. The next day he Im's me to tell me he will see the movie whenever I want to and that he'll be online later that night. So, I go on later that night and he never shows up.

At this point, I felt frustrated with all these games and told him that I didn't think things were working out. His only reply to that (1 day later) was that if it's not working out, to return his movie. I did.

So he remained invisible a week then started to show himself. After we broke up, I decided to move on and remained visible when I felt like it.

I felt really bothered that he didn't IM or call me to want to get back with me. I wrote to him to ask about something light and kept it cool so that it wouldn't be awkward if I ever saw him.

He told me about an upcoming show and then on the day it was occuring, I called and left a message to see if he wanted to see it since none of my friends were interested in going. Of course, he totally didn't call me back and then Im'ed me the next day to say that he would like to hang out later in the week.

The next day he drunk dialed me to hang out but I was too tired. (Wow, I actually received a phone call) I had worked a 12 hour shift, including commuting time. So I suggested hanging out the next day. He agreed and then the next day, he called 10 minutes late to tell me his car is dead.

WTF. I don't believe him so I call him on it and then he tells me that he's not into playing mind games. He just doesn't think about things. I told him not to call again and have had NC.

I don't want him back, but I want to know what sort of game this guy was playing. Also, what did I do wrong?

Please feel free to be honest with me. I can take criticism. I want to have FB's who are fun without all the drama. I prefer in-town FB's that last 3+ months. This guy is 10 years younger than me, could that be the problem? My other FB is 10 years older and the out of town ones are close to my age. If I want a younger FB, is the game played differently?
 

Mortukai

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Um, I don't think he was playing any games, it just sounds like he's not that interested in you. If he was playing games then he'd reward you when you tried to contact him by actually fvcking you, and he'd ignore you when you were pissing him off.

Maybe he thinks you are too old to have as a FB, maybe he doesn't want to be your toy-boy, maybe he doesn't find you non-fvcking company very interesting, or maybe you sucked in bed and he can get younger hotties so he couldn't be fvcked trying to get with you.

Or maybe he just wasn't that into you. You're getting older, get used to it. That might sound harsh, but that's reality. You girls get your time in the spotlight when you are younger, lording it over all the guys. Then you get older, and your tricks and powers fade, and you act surprised that guys don't play the way you want them to anymore. Stick with the older men, and sh!t will be easier.
 

cruzy

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that makes sense

You're right, he wasn't interested in me. I've never been with a younger guy so ageism and maturity were probably factors. He pursued me online so I thought the age difference wouldn't matter even though my friends cautioned me otherwise. Older guys or guys my age are much easier to deal with and usually want long term FB's. Thanks for your honesty. Oh, I'm 30 BTW.
 

flyinshark

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When you said that you stayed on invisible in order to play the same game as him, i thought that you were a teenager or maybe 20 the oldest. But you're 30, and i am kinda shocked to see that at 30 you get yourself down to the level of a 20 year old, playing such a dumb game.

My advice is be a woman and put yourself as visible when you are online. And when you actually did that, he immediately put himself as visible too. He may be a coward and hide behind a virtual cover, or he may be ignoring you for lack of interest in you, i don't know for sure. But the main point i wanna state is that you should face him and discuss things openly, and not hide your head in the sand like he was.
 

cruzy

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You're right. That was totally lame to be invisible too and stoop to his level. Oh well, I guess this is a learning experience.
 

PVSSY-EATER

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Cruzy!! Well, besides Wyldfire, we have a Female Don Juan on here. Welcome, to the don juan website.....(cheers and claps)

So you want advice, on what the hell is going on in this relationship you are having. Well, the funny thing is, this guy probably is a don juan himself, because it seems to me...(just me anyway) that he defiantly knows how to be a challenge. However, I must tell you this cruzy, you cant have two don juans in a relationship. Either one is a don juan, or neither! If you have two don juans, this= breakup. Because the guy has his convictions and the girl has hers.

Do you want me to tell you how to be a don juan? Well.....I refuse to do that. Now...hold on before you guys start to pull you sleeves up.

Besides feminists (which some can say are female don juans) the reason for so many damn afcs today, are because women are trying to be don juans! THAT IS NOT NATURAL! You are a woman, yes, you do deserve respect, but you dont have a right to step out and try to control the man! This is the problem in the world today. This is why most men are afcs, they are controlled by female don juans!

Shoot me down if you want, I am not going to teach you how to don juan your boyfriend or friend, or whoever he is. If he is a jerk, and you have grown tired of jerks, you would not be with him anyway, matter-of-fact, you wouldnt even care. The fact that he bothers you confirms that you care, confirms that you still like him, and THAT IS OKAY......JUST RELAX. It is natural for you to like him. He is a man. You are a woman. So relax, and continue being a woman. Do not think about being a don juan.
 

cruzy

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Life sucks huh, but what you're saying is true. You can't have 2 DJ's or there are too many power struggles. I got sick of the struggles and lack of commitment from DJ's and ended up marrying a chump. I just got out of a marriage 3 months ago (5 years incl the living together part) because he kissed the ground I walked on and never stood up for himself. I ***** tested him hoping that at some point he would crack and he only became more subservient. It was great to have someone so devoted and I still love him, but I didn't want to have sex with him. He wasn't a real man (a challenge as you say) and I am ashamed that I felt that way. I guess you guys are right even though women complain about your behavior.

My ex even agreed to an open marriage and those were good times because I had the beta cleaning up for me and alphas to bed down with, but after a while, he closed it due to jealousy and the fact that it was only open on my end. I hoped that he would have sex with other women so that he could prove to me that he was a man but he only wanted to be with me. Oh well, I had to let him go because the thought of just having sex only with him was unbearable and I didn't want to lower his self-esteem further. I was honest about it, we're still friends, and he still calls me every other day. We did the therapy thing with 2 therapists and they both agreed there was no hope. He would try to be DJ, but it was too weak of an attempt and I saw through the bull****. Once a chump, always a chump. You guys got to start out early establishing your boundaries.

The only time it has worked with me and another DJ is when we throw the games out the window and are honest with our intentions, which is rare and it's only an FB situation, not a LTR.

cheer:
 

PVSSY-EATER

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CRUZY, honey,

sTop being a don juan, okay.

Let a man, be a man. I know you probably can do it better, but just let a man be a man. You just be a woman.
 

Centaurion

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Please tell me that this is a gay dude trying to hook up with another assrider, and not some chick comming to a site helping MEN TO PICK UP WOMEN asking for advice....?
 

Don Juanabbe

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A female Don Juan? There's no such thing. This woman is simply a WH0RE, but it's more likely just a wind up.
 

cruzy

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Oh come on Don Juannabe, don't pull the W word, it's been so played. A true DJ loves women and isn't a DJ because he is misogynist compensating for the hurt he felt from his mamma. DJ's wouldn't exist if women weren't sexually liberated.

I'm just asking for advice of and an honest synopsis of my situation, not to be called derogitory names.
 

PVSSY-EATER

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Hey guys, actually, hehe.......she is a woman who actually is a don juan herself and I guess......hehe....thats why shes at the don juan website to get more tips!

See its funny, but guys do we ever notice, that most women are don juans themselves! They are independent, dont NEED a man and all that! Some of them can actually don juan better than us.....hahahaahahahaah! Dump ass AFCs!
 

PVSSY-EATER

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Hey guys, actually, hehe.......she is a woman who actually is a don juan herself and I guess......hehe....thats why shes at the don juan website to get more tips!

See its funny, but guys do we ever notice, that most women are don juans themselves! They are independent, dont NEED a man and all that! They got all those guys worshipping them, so they have created their own worlds, and they are the rulers! Some of them can actually don juan better than us!.....hahahaahahahaah! Poor AFCs! I would hate to live a life like that!
 

Lost In Translation

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ok time to cast my vote :

THIS IS A MENS WEBSITE

one of the very few places on the net MEN can come and get good advice and learn how to deal with todays modern woman

also this website provides alot of good information on all aspects of a MANS life

i agree with Centaurion and Don Juanabbe

110%



Lost In Translation

**AUSTRALIAN STREET PIMP**

Quote: PuertoRican_Lover
“First off - she is just another hor who has opened her legs to another man - you are no one special - and there are no "Greatest" to hors - you are just the next pimp in line!!! “
 

Qmanchoo

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I just got out of a marriage 3 months ago (5 years incl the living together part) because he kissed the ground I walked on and never stood up for himself. I ***** tested him hoping that at some point he would crack and he only became more subservient. It was great to have someone so devoted and I still love him, but I didn't want to have sex with him. He wasn't a real man (a challenge as you say) and I am ashamed that I felt that way. I guess you guys are right even though women complain about your behavior.
If you read that and didn't instantly say to yourself "Well not **** she left him!"... you should print that out and hang it on your bathroom mirror.
 
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By nature, women CANNOT be Don Juans since we have the hor/pimp dynamic - Don Juan are the pimps and thus by complementary natures the hor is the hor!
 

PVSSY-EATER

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but see guys, this backs up the point, that there are more women don juans in the world then men don juans. Men were created to be don juans, while women were created to be the nice guys or the afcs. You got me? But just like when a woman don juan enters the room, males turn into afcs....when a man don juan enters the room.....women turn into afcs! Lets go take back our thrones guys!
 

PVSSY-EATER

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PRL I agree, by nature women are not SUPPOSED to be don juans, but......THEY ARE. Reason being, because WE as males being afcs and nice guys, LET THEM.
 

cruzy

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I can't believe you're 41 and writing this bull. I pity your girls because they probably don't know what it's like to be with a real man.:crackup:
 
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