Disrespect And Women

[otr4]

I’m having trouble deciding how to handle this situation. Please help me out.
There is this girl I work with–I’ll call her “SARA.” I first started talking to her about 9 months ago. We eat lunch together all the time and used to workout together on a regular basis.
I’ve never really pursued her (because we work together), but there has always been a “special” kind of connection–or attraction–between us, but neither of us have chosen to take that road.
Anyway, this girl works in a different department than me–she doesn’t necessarily have a HIGHER position than me, but she acts like it. Last week I sent this form to her department that wasn’t complete (GOD FORBID!!) And she comes over to my desk where I work, is really angry, and starts raising her voice at me in front of a number of my co-workers, saying something like “did you even THINK when you did this?” and so on.
Needless to say, I WAS PISSED. I do not tolerate this type of thing. This girl would have never talked to another co-worker like she did to me–and this is because she knows me better than most of the people we work with.
After this situation, Sara immediately wrote me an e-mail saying that she was sorry. I never wrote back. I have only talked to her once in the past week and today she wrote me the following e-mail (this is the real thing, word for word):
“OTR4, seriously, what's going on? I've been getting these awful "I hate you" vibes from you. Are you angry or upset or hurt at something I've done? I'd really like to know. Be honest. What did I do?
SARA.”
This post is ALL ABOUT RESPECT.
Ever since I started coming to this site, I have learned that you must command respect when it comes to women or you will never succeed.
When it comes to women that are more on a friendship level, I’m not sure what to do. How would you guys respond to this girl? I want to respond in the most powerful and productive way. Thanks for the advice.

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

"Anyway, this girl works in a different department than me–she doesn’t necessarily have a HIGHER position than me, but she acts like it. "

than why did you let her treat you like garbage? why did you just sit there and take it like a puss??

 

[otr4]

This is why I'm posting--to figure out what action I should take now. What should I write back or say to her?

 

[Joe The Homophobe]

Do you want advice on how to be friends with her again, or do you want dj advice because you want this woman?

if you want to be friends first you must consider her response. You said that she emailed you and she says that she doesn't know why you give her "i hate you vibes." Is her memory that bad that she forgot that she made you look like an idiot infront of people? If you say to her that you still remember the incident in the office, this is going to make you look like a sissy, it will just plain make you look bad because it will make you look like a hurt puppy. The best way to solve this would to say "Just your imagination" there is nothing wrong. Avoid any talk of the incident and pretend nothing has ever happened. Then you can live normally again.

if you want advice on getting her, the simple dj advice would be to stay away from her. No intelligent man/dj would go after a woman that embarrased him infront of others. This is a trait of hers which means trouble for you if you get a relationship with her. She will be a ***** and you can bet on it.

 

[Adrian]

She's probably testing you to see if you would forgive her so easily. If you do then she would think you would tolerate more nonsense from her. I would follow Joe's advice. He makes a really good point.

 

[DeathDealer]

I dated a girl once that humiliated me in front of others by pointing out a weakness. Other people laughed, my friends told me that she's psycho and wrong for doing that. I thought nothing of it and acted like it did't affect me. I waited for a chance though to publicly humiliate and make fun of her as well. The moment she started getting angry at me, I brought up that incident - She grew even more furious. At that moment I knew that this girl would not own up to anything due to selfishness and thus I left her at another city 2 hours drive away from her home.

 

[DJStudent]

I have a similar story to yours and I'll briefly go over it. I was going out with this girl and I guess it's just physical attraction but I don't know what. We hooked up and I thought we were going out, we went to a party and she like dances with other guys which I don't mind, but the fact that she choose to ignore me, showed me a great deal of disrespect. I was pissed off course but didn't say anything that night. I kept my anger down and wait until I was thinking straight. Then the next night we went to a dance thing and I asked her what our current situation was. She said that we're just friends and nothing more. I said ok good to know and gave her a hug and left. I didn't talk to her for a week and when I saw her again she was all up into me again. Asked why haven't I called and so on. I reverted back to my old self, joking, messing around, just as if it never happend, and she's acting like we're back together or something but we're not since no one should be that disrespectful. Now she's trying to make dates with me in 2 weeks advance making sure that my schedule is free. I said maybe if she's lucky. I got her good with that one.

My advice would be talk to her but not about the incident. You gave her a week to think about what she did and she knows what she did wrong, she's asking you to verify what she did. But don't give her such an easy time, let her think about it some more. Also don't send her any "i hate you" vibes . It's in the past and a week ago. Just think of nothing when you see her. Revert back to your old self but let her feel that she's not so high and pretty and more. She's going to naturally want to regain the spot and let her earn it. Don't be a baby and don't even give the girl a chance. We've all made mistakes because of bad days and whatnot. Think of it as a learning experience and it was good thatit happened.