Ok.
Well there is no unified theory, and there is none because it can't exist. And its a bit silly to make one.
Thats ok to think you need one btw, because us humans - men especially - need to define everything so it fits nicely in with our "ideals" about life.
You are looking for an "ideal". One big ideal
and i want to be the first one to tell you, unfortunately - you can feel it coming right - ideals do not exist.
We create ideals as humans, that from what WE think should be the way things are.
However, the problem with ideals are - in the real world, they can never be acurate. We like to hold to our ideals, but it never happens because they dont represent reality closely enough. And our idelas change over time....your ideals as a child were different to those you have now, and they will change again over time, slowly but surely...and it goes on and on like a revolving circle.
You seem to be also breaking your desired ideals down into sections....thus making a grand theory or something of the equivalant.
It wont work, and you shouldnt even try it anyway....because its just not needed.
What you need is knowledge and experience.
What you need to say to yourself is "i deserve to have it better and i wont quit until i do"
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Then you mentioned attitude in your post....thanks man.
Attitude is great. You are on the right track here.
Attitudes are flexible and dont require the world around them to work...because they work independantly of the world.
And people can look-up to and admire the attitudes of another person.
So i think your question has already been answered in the "book of shumagora" You can find it on the bible page of the web site.
In it he explains his attitude and his general way of life and women and his insight into it all. It is well worth a read, and it comes close i suppose to forfilling what you a seeking to find....something to look-up to.
One piece that impressed me and its something i have incorporated into myself is this attitude.....as a dj you should live your life and not care overly much about women. Focus your energies primarily on your own goals in life, this creates a magnetism to the opposite sex...because when you are so involved in your own hobbies, interests and friends, you wont be worried about women, and because of this, this is the very thing that makes them want to have you."
That attitude worked for him. Its a piece irrespective of self-improvement and all the rest....its a state to strive for and a goal to reach....
kind of like an ideal, but in the form of an attainable attitude.
And its the truth...less desparation=more magneticly attractive qualities....
too many guys on this site are trying to impress girls, steal girls, or desparately trying to find girls to pick up....
chicks spot that crap a mile off.
find a balance. Better yet, strive for the real deal....
you sound like you dont have much confidence....otherwise you wouldnt need a complete list to reframe your view of the world.
Read student....study this site, read the bible, gain knowlede, then USE that knowledge....having confidence is simply having a lack of insecurity.....if you have dark spots in your mind where there is no knowlege about somehting, fill the void with answers.
Go live, and experience. Live life...there is no substitute. You are on the right path...
i suggest the thing above as something to strive for. tailor it to suit you...but remember.....no desparation....no clingyness.....get what YOU want.....relax.....live.... and my favourite piece of advice to aspiriing dj's : put yourself in the way of opertunity rather than searching desparately for it.
That requires action. You have much to learn...good luck. You dont know how good you will feel when you are more confident until you've gotten out there and lived and PUSHED YOUR LIMITS
That builds confidence quick....and you will know you are pushing your limits (and expanding your horizons) when you feel uncomfortable....thats how you grow as a person.
Thanks for posting.
