Deleting a Facebook?

[BPH]

I read f283000's thing about how Facebook dissolves your aura of mystery and shows when you're bored and have nothing to do. I'm taking this into account as his point really makes sense, and I'm really on the fence about deleting my own.

I'm afraid of being out of touch with my real friends and not knowing about events or dances etc. Maybe I could make a new account just for close friends and family?

So please leave your opinions, and please back them up with something, I hope somebody can post something that will help me make up my mind.

Thanks in advance

EDIT: Take into account that I'm 16

 

[PDubb75]

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=182153

Scroll down to my post at the end if you want my take on it. Some other good points of view in there, too.

If you only want your family and close friends, why don't you just delete everyone else instead of making a new account?

 

[Audiophile]

Facebook is a tool, if you know how to properly use it, you can get a lot out of it. Deleting facebook doesn't instantly make you "more mysterious". You have to have previous value in order for anyone to even care/notice. If you really care about this "aura of mystery", then just take all of your info off of your facebook and make all of your albums viewable only by you.

Don't take the advice a lot of guys here tell you just because it's repeated over and over. Remember, most of the guys saying that you shouldn't use facebook aren't your age, where facebook is very important when it comes to setting up events and communicating with others. Don't do what you think you should do just because you read it here, do what you want to.

Do you use facebook? Do you find it useful? If so, then don't delete it.

 

[SamTheHobit]

In all honesty a 'friend' would keep in touch regardless of facebook or not. If its not convient for them they obviously dont give two fvcks about you. Just my thaughts.

Deleted it at the start of 2011.

 

[PDubb75]

In all honesty a 'friend' would keep in touch regardless of facebook or not. If its not convient for them they obviously dont give two fvcks about you. Just my thaughts.

Deleted it at the start of 2011.

I don't exactly agree. There are different degrees of "friends". I do not have anywhere near the time available to call all of the people I talk to on Facebook even somewhat regularly.

One other major aspect I haven't seen anyone mention: Facebook is the prefered method of most of your friends! Assuming they use it in the first place. Just because you decide to not use Facebook and start calling, doesn't mean your friends will, or want that. They are going to continue using it, leaving you out in the cold unless YOU make the effort EVERY TIME.

Deleting Facebook for the reasons mentioned here goes against everything this site is about, in my mind. For many people, that would be a drastic change they are making in their life, and they are making it simply for the slight possible benefit from women? If WE are supposed to be the prize, why are WE making sacrifices for THEM?

If you enjoy Facebook, keep it. I am keeping it, because that is what I want.

 

[f283000]

I get tempted all the time to get back on it. Peer pressure from friends, the ability to see profiles of hot girls, sending messages etc etc.

But I then think of the positives and realize I made a good decisions. Positives such as

1. The free time I get not staring at the computer being logged on to facebook everyday: For a lot of people that can be an hour or more a day of their life they are losing staring at a computer screen every day of EVERY WEEK! You could work out, go outside and run, study, work on your own business, do all kinds of things that are more productive.

2. Being forced to keep improving myself by actually going out of the house to meet women rather than getting complacent and trying to do it online: Sending messages over facebook is easy but what are you going to do when you actually have to meet the girls face to face? You're going to fail. Get your game tight first by approaching women in person rather than pu$$y footing your way out of that like a lot of guys now a days and just trying to do it online.

There is a world of difference when it comes to interacting with people online and in person. Learn to do it in person and that will improve you as a man and will stay with you for the rest of your life.

3. Staying mysterious is another big advantage: I like my privacy I don't like people knowing everything about me specially women. Some PUA's recommend never talking to a woman on the weekends to keep them guessing. Having no facebook has the same effect. She will always wish you had a facebook so she could know more about you thus keep herself under control.

If you want to use online game to get women sign up at POF or okCupid.

 

[Audiophile]

Responses in bold

I get tempted all the time to get back on it. Peer pressure from friends, the ability to see profiles of hot girls, sending messages etc etc.

But I then think of the positives and realize I made a good decisions. Positives such as

1. The free time I get not staring at the computer being logged on to facebook everyday. For a lot of people that can be an hour or more a day of their life they are losing starting at a computer screen EVERY WEEK! You could work out, go outside and run, study, work on your own business, do all kinds of things that are more productive.

This is a matter of self control. I understand that maybe YOU were wasting way too much time on facebook, but this isn't the case for everyone.

2. Being forced to keep improving myself by actually going out of the house to meet women rather than getting complacent and trying to do it online. Sending messages over facebook is easy but what are you going to do when you actually have to meet the girls face to face? You're going to fail. Get your game tight first by approaching women in person rather than pu$$y footing your way out of that like a lot of guys now a days and just trying to do it online.


I agree completely. Facebook shouldn't be used to meet NEW women. Sending a message to a girl every now and then to set up a meet works like a charm though. I don't like the whole "You're going to fail" assumption. IF the guy has good game, it will become apparent over facebook and in real life.


There is a world of difference when it comes to interacting with people online and in person. Learn to do it in person and that will improve you as a man and will stay with you for the rest of your life.


Agreed. However, you are basing this on the assumption that the person will be spending ALL day on facebook and will barely be getting any real physical interaction in. Facebook is an example of the future of communication. Social media IS the future, it will be harder and harder to resist as time goes on.

3. Staying mysterious is another big advantage. I like my privacy I don't like people knowing everything about me specially women. Some PUA's recommend never talking to a woman on the weekends to keep them guessing. Having no facebook has the same effect.

You can still stay mysterious on facebook by simply using the privacy options and not allowing anyone to view all of your photos/info.

Pdubb said it best "If WE are supposed to be the prize, why are WE making sacrifices for THEM? "

Don't base your decisions on whether or not it will allow you to get with more women/keep a Don Juan lifestyle... this is the OPPOSITE of what a don juan is about.

 

[Diaforetikos]

You don't need it. You were living a social life before Facebook. You couldeasily do it without it.

I read f283000's sig and decided I needrd to give it up. Its been 4 month and I don't miss a thing. At first I was finding myself randomly trying to log in out of habit, but once you get past that first 2 months, you'll be asking yourself why you had one in the first place.

As far as staying in touch with the closer people in your life, I say still delete your Facebook. After a month or two if you feel you still want one, dont make one. Let your dependency fade away, then once you feel that you have control, go ahead and make one.

You'll do find. Just drop it and let life behind the screen become your reality.

Oh, and by the way, as soon as I dropped my Facebook, the girl I wanted to date for the previous 2 years wanted sex from me and we've been dating ever since. So, delete away.

Good luck.

 

[francoatgrex]

I agree with f283000, it is beneficial to just delete the account and forget about Facebook altogether. But you need to substitute that with a real active life otherwise it won't work, you'll suffer "withdraw symptoms". Another less drastic possibility is to reduce the amount of information you put up about yourself. For example, you can set your privacy level to a maximum, have only one or two pictures; like that you can continue to stalk others but remain safe and mysterious yourself (note though that I do not consider this as a healthy option, the first one being the preferred).

 

[Gray The Prince]

I swear some of you guys make me wanna bang my head against the wall sometimes...

 

[Audiophile]

I swear some of you guys make me wanna bang my head against the wall sometimes...

Care to elaborate?

*Edit - Made a thread about this a while ago, check it out.
http://sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=180798

 

[BPH]

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gray The Prince
I swear some of you guys make me wanna bang my head against the wall sometimes...



Care to elaborate?

Yea I'd like to hear what he means too

 

[SoSuaveDude]

If you're an 18 through 21 y/o, facebook is almost a necessity!

 

[Darth]

20 years old. Lots of friends. No facebook.

 

[georgie24]

dont jazz it up like a myspace and use it to represent you, it has pros n cons

 

[BPH]

Thanks guys

Last night I decided to delete my Facebook after reading your opinions on it.

 

[loveshogun]

I was going to say, for me, who had life before Facebook and was on Facebook almost when it first started, I have been able to compare data sets of friends BF (before Facebook) and friends AF (sic).

I came to the conclusion that all of my best friends were ones I'd met in real life and had ways of getting in touch that didn't require Facebook. All of the other people were just filler, people I almost never contacted and who never contacted me.

However, this kid is 16. Facebook is like, a fact of life for him. It's a different ball game, one I know nothing about.

Based on my experiences though, I recommend you delete the account. I still believe there is no substitute for in person human interaction, and if you need proof, consider that typing on a screen versus speaking in person quite frequently turns people who are otherwise normal into raving a*shats on a crusade to kill their opponent (on the internet). This happens because half the conversation is missing - emotional and visual cues.

I deleted my account a while ago, and noticed that I was reconnecting with many of my old friends more than ever before, because now I have to call and actually meet up with them.

Whatever you do, make sure it has meaning.

 

[Sir Psycho Sexy]

Dont delete it. Im 20 so at a similar age. If you want to save some mystery then keep your information minimal and make your tagged photos unavailable for others to see.

Just have the basic information, male, your age, your hometown and maybe a couple more things. I also suggest making your tagged photos private and your profile pictures the only photos others can see.

 

[Pierce]

I think facebook is good if you are single. It has many advantages as well as disadvantages. I think it makes a lot of guys lazy though. I deleted my facebook last year because it was bringing a lot of stress in my relationship with my gf. It probably does for a lot of people in LTR.