Delete a number right now.

Meisterman

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Seriously. Do it. Practice walking away while you're ahead in the game. If she texts/calls you back, you can work from there and pick her up again. But drop someone now.

What's that? You're too scared that you'll never hear from her again? Well guess what, if you are then you already lost because you are attached and desperate. A true DJ would never have a problem walking away, even when things are at their best. So what are you waiting for?
 

Comatozed

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Not sure what the point of deleting numbers is tbh.

I got plenty numbers I have no intention of ever doing anything with and I am happy to never hear from them all again, but what does deleting them actually achieve.

Waste of time. If I could say the word and them all be gone then fine but it seems like a pointless exercize.

Each to their own though, if it helps people feel like a 'true DJ'.
 

Comatozed

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Not sure what the point of deleting numbers is tbh.

I got plenty numbers I have no intention of ever doing anything with and I am happy to never hear from them all again, but what does deleting them actually achieve.

Waste of time. If I could say the word and them all be gone then fine but it seems like a pointless exercize.

Each to their own though, if it helps people feel like a 'true DJ'.
 

LMFAO

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I usually archive conversations on Whatsapp for anyone I don't want to contact anytime soon but can't help myself if they keep showing up near the top of the list. The number stuff for me is less important since I never look at my contact list but I agree with the general sentiment.
 

Meisterman

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Comatozed said:
Not sure what the point of deleting numbers is tbh.

I got plenty numbers I have no intention of ever doing anything with and I am happy to never hear from them all again, but what does deleting them actually achieve.

Waste of time. If I could say the word and them all be gone then fine but it seems like a pointless exercize.

Each to their own though, if it helps people feel like a 'true DJ'.
Because 90% of guys when deleting a number will get an acute sense of panic, anxiety, nervousness etc. which is really just desperation and insecurity. The thing is, when you have the girl you aren't aware of these feelings to begin with. You don't even know you have them because the girl is your security blanket . And it isn't until AFTER she drops you that you realize you were way too invested in her. And now your security blanket is gone and your left exposed and with heartache. At least that's what the case is 90% of guys when a girl leaves them.

How many posts do you see from dudes asking "Where did I go wrong?" "She stopped responding out of nowhere" "She went ice cold" and "I was too needy". Every day. Every fvckin day. And how many do you see saying you were so busy enjoying life and other women that she just disappeared and you forgot about her, and YOU walked away? Almost none.

Thing is she should text or call you back. 90% of the time they do. So assuming you've built high IL with her, you can figure you'll see her again anyway. But the point isn't so much deleting the number as it is watching how you react when you do it. If the thought of it makes you uneasy, or gives you anxiety of any sort then you have your priorities mixed up. And your security blanket is thinning, waiting to be pulled off you and leave you exposed. Because guess what? Someday she WILL leave you and if you aren't ready to deal with it now then you will be forced to later. But that is a much more painful process than detaching and letting go BEFORE it happens, so when it finally does happen you realize you've lost nothing.

Usually it takes a hard smack across the face of the girl leaving before the guy actually realizes what he was doing wrong. If you do something like deleting a number randomly it's a good way to practice detachment and ultimately make you more confident, because then when you ARE with a chick, you KNOW that you don't need her, you KNOW that she can't give you any extra fulfillment that you don't already have. So many guys will say this and pretend it, but few actually BELIEVE it and know it.
 

jurry

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Great post meisterman, more of these and less asking "howd i mess this up" or "why isnt she calling".
 

astrn

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Meisterman said:
Because 90% of guys when deleting a number will get an acute sense of panic, anxiety, nervousness etc. which is really just desperation and insecurity. The thing is, when you have the girl you aren't aware of these feelings to begin with. You don't even know you have them because the girl is your security blanket . And it isn't until AFTER she drops you that you realize you were way too invested in her. And now your security blanket is gone and your left exposed and with heartache. At least that's what the case is 90% of guys when a girl leaves them.

How many posts do you see from dudes asking "Where did I go wrong?" "She stopped responding out of nowhere" "She went ice cold" and "I was too needy". Every day. Every fvckin day. And how many do you see saying you were so busy enjoying life and other women that she just disappeared and you forgot about her, and YOU walked away? Almost none.

Thing is she should text or call you back. 90% of the time they do. So assuming you've built high IL with her, you can figure you'll see her again anyway. But the point isn't so much deleting the number as it is watching how you react when you do it. If the thought of it makes you uneasy, or gives you anxiety of any sort then you have your priorities mixed up. And your security blanket is thinning, waiting to be pulled off you and leave you exposed. Because guess what? Someday she WILL leave you and if you aren't ready to deal with it now then you will be forced to later. But that is a much more painful process than detaching and letting go BEFORE it happens, so when it finally does happen you realize you've lost nothing.

Usually it takes a hard smack across the face of the girl leaving before the guy actually realizes what he was doing wrong. If you do something like deleting a number randomly it's a good way to practice detachment and ultimately make you more confident, because then when you ARE with a chick, you KNOW that you don't need her, you KNOW that she can't give you any extra fulfillment that you don't already have. So many guys will say this and pretend it, but few actually BELIEVE it and know it.
^ This. Assuming that the girl you liked also had your number and she is still interested in you and even if you delete her number SHE WILL REACH YOU NO MATTER WHAT as long as SHE HAD FEELINGS TOWARDS YOU.

If she is not, then you saved your ass from alot of trouble! Do not waste time with uninterested chicks! That must be your number 1 priority!
 

Comatozed

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Meisterman said:
Because 90% of guys when deleting a number will get an acute sense of panic, anxiety, nervousness etc. which is really just desperation and insecurity. The thing is, when you have the girl you aren't aware of these feelings to begin with. You don't even know you have them because the girl is your security blanket . And it isn't until AFTER she drops you that you realize you were way too invested in her. And now your security blanket is gone and your left exposed and with heartache. At least that's what the case is 90% of guys when a girl leaves them.

How many posts do you see from dudes asking "Where did I go wrong?" "She stopped responding out of nowhere" "She went ice cold" and "I was too needy". Every day. Every fvckin day. And how many do you see saying you were so busy enjoying life and other women that she just disappeared and you forgot about her, and YOU walked away? Almost none.

Thing is she should text or call you back. 90% of the time they do. So assuming you've built high IL with her, you can figure you'll see her again anyway. But the point isn't so much deleting the number as it is watching how you react when you do it. If the thought of it makes you uneasy, or gives you anxiety of any sort then you have your priorities mixed up. And your security blanket is thinning, waiting to be pulled off you and leave you exposed. Because guess what? Someday she WILL leave you and if you aren't ready to deal with it now then you will be forced to later. But that is a much more painful process than detaching and letting go BEFORE it happens, so when it finally does happen you realize you've lost nothing.

Usually it takes a hard smack across the face of the girl leaving before the guy actually realizes what he was doing wrong. If you do something like deleting a number randomly it's a good way to practice detachment and ultimately make you more confident, because then when you ARE with a chick, you KNOW that you don't need her, you KNOW that she can't give you any extra fulfillment that you don't already have. So many guys will say this and pretend it, but few actually BELIEVE it and know it.
Fair enough I take your point now.

I was talking about a bunch of numbers of girls of which some I haven't even met (tinder) and the majority I have 0 investment so deleting would not phase me at all.

I can resonate with it though as deleting my oneitus' number and from fb/twitter was something that made me feel uneasy and scared I was severing any last ties and chances to get her back. I did it eventually cos it was getting to me seeing her **** in my news feeds. If i get dumped by anyone I care about in the future, I won't hesitate to erase completely. I can't see me letting my self get hurt/invested again in the future though, which is good..i guess.
 

Meisterman

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Comatozed said:
Fair enough I take your point now.

I was talking about a bunch of numbers of girls of which some I haven't even met (tinder) and the majority I have 0 investment so deleting would not phase me at all.

I can resonate with it though as deleting my oneitus' number and from fb/twitter was something that made me feel uneasy and scared I was severing any last ties and chances to get her back. I did it eventually cos it was getting to me seeing her **** in my news feeds. If i get dumped by anyone I care about in the future, I won't hesitate to erase completely. I can't see me letting my self get hurt/invested again in the future though, which is good..i guess.
Well of course that wouldn't work then. I was talking about a girl you've already established some sort of relationship with (at least 3-4 dates, already banged) so you know there's some connection there. Guys usually don't come off as needy right away, instead it happens slowly without them realizing it so that's why it's important to check yourself when things are going "great." Because that's usually when you get blindsided the most is when you least expect it.

Questions to consider:

-How is the text & call frequency now compared to when we first met? (or started dating/fvcking)

-How often is she initiating texts nowadays? If for the first month she initiated 80% of the time, and now you find yourself initiating 70%, there's an imbalance there that needs to be corrected. That's because her initiating 80% is what MADE her attracted to you in the first place.

-Then you get in the mindset of "Oh she already likes me now so I can be more open and attentive to her" nope. She doesn't like you, she likes the chase. She likes the game. She likes the thrill of it and the drama. The constant swings between excitement/anxiety, her hamster spinning out of control trying to figure you out but you're too mysterious, unpredictable, and detached. THATS what she craves. And she misinterprets these emotions as strong attraction towards you, because she's invested so much mental energy on you it's her only way to rationalize it (subconsciously).

-And as soon as you flip the switch and start investing more into her, you lose the very traits that made her attracted to you to begin with. She doesn't want you to like her as much as she likes you. She thinks she does, but she doesn't. Because then it will appear she is above you. And once she's above you there's no more game. There's no thrill, no chase, no excitement. At that point she'll dump you and pick up the "game" with a new guy who actually knows how to play it (or does if naturally because that's just who he is).
 

Meisterman

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jurry said:
Great post meisterman, more of these and less asking "howd i mess this up" or "why isnt she calling".
Agreed. Would love to see more of these and less of the latter. We always preach "alpha ness" & being a true DJ, whereas by the looks of it the girls are more alpha than the guys they're dating because they walk away 90% of the time . And then they can lose interest fast and monkey branch to another guy.

But isn't that what we preach as DJs? To spin plates, to be willing to walk away, to esteem yourself as the 'prize' and don't put her above you? Well it's time to man the fvck up gentlemen! Take back your manhood while you still can.
 

sylvester the cat

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Good post. Done. Three of them. And feel much better for it.

Plato is my only true love anyway.
 
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El Payaso

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Wow. You know, I read OP's first post and thought he was just mental until I read his second post. A whole lot of truth and insight into it. Detach yourself early on and strengthen your inner core because like all things, women come and go.
 

Deadly_Ripped

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Just did it. Forgot I had a few old numbers in there and this was a great reminder for me to clean up my contacts.
 

stevo

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Good post, I actually do this to all my plates. i just don't save the number (i send a text to it after i get it so I have a reference) and after we fcuk I delete my messages after every convo. She hit me up fine, she don't, oh well. I'm fine regardless. :woo:

Plus if someone was to grab my phone, I have no text msg to hide bcos there's no msg at all.
 

Meisterman

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stevo said:
Good post, I actually do this to all my plates. i just don't save the number (i send a text to it after i get it so I have a reference) and after we fcuk I delete my messages after every convo. She hit me up fine, she don't, oh well. I'm fine regardless. :woo:

Plus if someone was to grab my phone, I have no text msg to hide bcos there's no msg at all.
I usually don't save them either. If I delete them I'll usually have the area code or first few digits memorized so I know who's calling. But otherwise I'll have no way of reaching them. As I said 90% of the time they'll contact you if you delete during high IL (which is what I'm telling you to do).
 

Roni_88

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Awesome thread, A Rock solid base for any Don Juan. This is Bible material. Thank you
 

Embers84

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Yeah, no use in having any old numbers that aren't being used. This also goes for an ex you are in NC with no need having that number in your phone.
 

VladPatton

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I agree. Once you can do this at will you're 75% of the way home. You must remove that desperate hope you have of her calling you. Delete and move on.

Plus, you get to honestly say "Who the phuck is this??!!" in the event she does call again. Until that happens...don't hold you're breath.
 

captain55

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The best relationship I ever had, came from a girl with whom I had actually deleted her number. Asked her out like four times and after she kept blowing me off I finally just said **** it BYEBYE b ii t c h.

Long story short she contacted me three weeks later and I recognized the area code. Ended up dating and she was a great chick. Had I not recognized the area code I would never have met her so no I wouldn't recommend deleting a number because you never know what might happen
 

stevo

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captain55 said:
The best relationship I ever had, came from a girl with whom I had actually deleted her number. Asked her out like four times and after she kept blowing me off I finally just said **** it BYEBYE b ii t c h.

Long story short she contacted me three weeks later and I recognized the area code. Ended up dating and she was a great chick. Had I not recognized the area code I would never have met her so no I wouldn't recommend deleting a number because you never know what might happen
Believe it or not you did yourself a favor deleting the number. You put yourself in the mindset that could get her. Safe to say deleting the number secured you dating her. If you had the number still you just might have asked her out again, might be slim but possible.

As to deleting numbers, remember like the first 3 numbers after the area code if you have same area code or just keep the text thread to reference. I always mention their name and where we met stylishly in my first text so I know who's who.
 
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