Definition of a MAN

[PEACEDJ]

Hey, today is one of the most significant time of my life on this website. After 3 years of struggle and success of becomming *that* Don Juan, I found my center. Day after day, I spent hours on this website trying to learn more and more about dating. I can say that on this website there are more (tips) on "dating" rather then becomming a Honest, Truthful, Man (DonJuan). Don't get me wrong these tips and articles helped me out alot and got me in a MUCH higher level of dating. All that seemed to feel as if I was learning more and I kept thinking the "tips about dating" was the main thing that will get me to be where I want to be. How wrong was I to think that!

Being a Don Juan wasn't about reading and broading my knowledge about dating! Being a Don Juan means to become a Honest, Truthful, Intellegent, Ambitious, MAN!

Now I understood why I was feeling so empty while I still had SO much success with women. I figured out that you had to be a man inorder for happiness to fill in with success!

Every failure, every success felt the same. I wasn't completely being myself, most of the time I seemed to be different around others depending on who they were, but practice after practice that skill of being "fake" just came natually and so I was bound to have success (which by then I thought this was the way to become a Don Juan). At last, I figured out this isn't how I should be acting! I should be myself focus 100% on my own life rather then trying to get success by being a different individual on every
different occasion.

By reading these tips it made me "smarter" in the dating game, BUT didn't provide me on how these characteristics can come natually by being yourself and by being a Man. Don't get me wrong of course you need to read these tips to experience good success. What I'm trying to say is you can't be happy with
your success when your not yourself..when your not a true man.


Alright then! Don Juans, from now on we are NOT going to stop a little negative situation get in our way, we aren't going to spend hours thinking about a girl, we are definitly not going to become
feminine, WE ARE going to focus on our lives, WE ARE going to become the best we can possibly be!

"why?"... you ask? WELL BECAUSE WE ARE DON JUANS!!!

 

[Pook]

Now I understood why I was feeling so empty while I still had SO much success with women. I figured out that you had to be a man inorder for happiness to fill in with success!

Here's a post I don't see too often around here: a guy who has finally made the distinction between his own happiness and being desired by women.

It is CHICKS who place their happiness on being desired by the opposite sex. It is CHICKS who place their ego, their self esteem, their entire destiny in how people percieve them, in who they date, etc.

These terms should clarify things:

MONAD- an indivisible unit that constitutes reality (the base unit of metaphysics)

HENID- Matter that demands to be molded and shaped. Henids possess no existence and recieve their existence from others.

You cannot be 'happy' being successful with women because man's nature is to be a monad. Women are the henids; they demand to be loved by all. A guy cannot be truly happy playing the role of the female.

Every failure, every success felt the same.

Some guys may seem confused by this quote. When you place the focus on 'success with women', you cease being a monad and so risk losing your destiny. In other words, happiness comes when you are chasing down your dreams and ambitions, your own destiny.

I wasn't completely being myself, most of the time I seemed to be different around others depending on who they were, but practice after practice that skill of being "fake" just came natually and so I was bound to have success (which by then I thought this was the way to become a Don Juan).

Exactly! Any guy can be successful with women by playing the henid. But being successful with women while being monad is what makes a Don Juan. Even Weineger agrees.

Weineger says: Corresponding to true women, there are extremely female men who are to be found always in the apartments of the women, and who are interested in nothing but love and sexual matters. Such men, however, are not the Don Juans.

At last, I figured out this isn't how I should be acting! I should be myself focus 100% on my own life rather then trying to get success by being a different individual on every
different occasion.

Absolutely! Many guys go this route because they want to be envied by other males. This is also chick thinking, henid thinking. We are called to be monads, to blaze our own path however and wherever we want.

By reading these tips it made me "smarter" in the dating game, BUT didn't provide me on how these characteristics can come natually by being yourself and by being a Man. Don't get me wrong of course you need to read these tips to experience good success. What I'm trying to say is you can't be happy with
your success when your not yourself.

This quote will mystify some of the guys here as well. To be a Man is to be a monad. Confidence, challenge, going for what you want, these are all side effects of being the monad. You do not rebase your reality or dreams based on what others think, including women.

Right now, I am single. Often, a guy will try to rub it in that he now has a girlfriend and that I ought to be jealous. I just smile at him. I know that he is deflating his own ambitions and dreams to 'stay' with her. He doesn't know he is appealing to Womaniverse. He doesn't realize that he didn't actively CHOOSE her. She chose him and he liked her because she liked him. A healthy relationship is a monad and a henid. However, this relationship was two henids. The result was that he ends up acting AFC eventually and she leaves him. All those months of wasted time and money, and I just smile at his past smugness.

Being a Man is not being macho. Being a Man is embracing your own destiny, standing for what YOU want for once in your life, to stop being influenced by others, by having a sense of self, by acting on your own sexuality, by not fearing your own sexuality, and uniting dream and day.

When I say women are attracted to MEN, I am not saying the cliche that women love 'confidence' or 'muscles' or whatever else. Women seek the monads. Things like confidence and drive come naturally from being a monad. You do not think, "That chick is hot. I must win her!" You think, "I think that chick is hot. Let's see if she is WORTHY of me!"

Great post, PeaceDJ. Glad to see someone gets it (many men never do which is why a man is such a rarity these days).

 

[PEACEDJ]

Wow, ::speechless:: Thanks POOK!!!!!- PeaceDJ

 

[USSOCOM]

It is rare, but a great thing because it makes life 100% better. Once you realize that you are your own person, its fun meeting new people, its a matter of breaking down barriers of what other people think of you (parents, peers etc.) nice post soldier....

 

[radiodude]

Exactly!!!

This all couldn't have been said better.

The traits that define you as a man will always be those which carry you onward and give you the greatest strength. The masculine journey is one of endurance and embracing the masculine self.

The 'details' come second. Usually these details are humanly universal attractive traits. For instance, Any man or woman wants to be around a fun, confident PERSON. But it is the masculine feminine differences in our essence that makes the difference. There's nothing wrong with being nice, warm, and loving as long as your a MAN first.

Prime example:
Right now I am dating a wonderful girl. We connect extremely well, and I can definately see myself with her. There is a problem though. She wants to leave the state to pursue a job. Now this may not happen, as she has other options around here. But, it's one of the things she'd really like to do. Now, in a situation involving two Henids, the guy will drop everything and FOLLOW HER if she moves. In this case however, I will be staying right here, outside losing my job from natural circumstances, and move when I see fit.

So, yes, if she decides not to stay, providing we are right for each other and she proves herself worthy, it will hurt b/c there goes a woman worth cherishing and spending life with...BUT, I cannot sacrifice my dreams and goals and what I see fit to do. She will have to follow me. Which if things continue to go well...she IS a woman and she hopefully will act accordingly and stay...and follow me.

 

[Sisko]

Originally posted by PEACEDJ
By reading these tips it made me "smarter" in the dating game, BUT didn't provide me on how these characteristics can come natually by being yourself and by being a Man. Don't get me wrong of course you need to read these tips to experience good success. What I'm trying to say is you can't be happy with
your success when your not yourself..

"why?"... you ask? WELL BECAUSE WE ARE DON JUANS!!!

Exactly!

When I first came here I read only the hall of fame tips on the main page.
Now that was all cool and good, and it did get my mind to start accepting the DJ way.

Then I joined the forum and started reading the bible.
I read it and found it great. A little later, I started to see the differences in some posts.
There were the "MINDSET" posts and "TECHNIQUE" posts.
I hope you all understand what i mean.
The problem with the bible is that there are not enough mindset posts. Only techniques.

Pook almost always speaks abouth mindset, and that is why he is so popular. That is why I enjoy Matrixes posts as well.

 

[oreo_renegade]

"I like them to talk nonsene. Thats mans privelege over all creation. Through error you come to the truth! I am a man because I err! You never reach any truth without making fourteen mistakes and very likely a hundred and fourteen. And a fine thing too, in its way; but we cant even make mistake on our own account! Talk nonsense, but talk your own nonsense, and ill kiss you for it. To go wrong in ones own way is better then to go right in someone elses. In the first case you are a man, in the second you are no better than a bird. Truth wont escape you, but life can be cramped...We prefer to live on other peoples ideas, its what we are used to! Am I right, am I right?"

Well I think you are

That was quoted from Crime and Punishment by Dosteovsky. Razumihin is speaking, page 188 in this book.

I will go back and read the full thread before replying anything on my own, but it is extremely late now so I just put that in.

**
Ok, so now after I read the full thread, I agree with Pook and Peaced DJ.

A man(monad) defines the world he lives in. A woman(henid) waits to be defined by the world.

I know this one guy, he always has a girl with him, and is always groping tons of girls. Is he a DJ?

I bet you can already guess he isnt. Ive talked to him, there is no MAN there at all. There is only an AFC drive to prove himself as a "man" by getting all the girls he can.

He is extremely uncomfortable around me, and usually trys to pull off some stunt showing how he can get girls.

It makes me sad really because he places no value on himself. He is a male slut.

Now I go around and hug everyone I feel like hugging, or groping any girl I want as well.

The difference is that I do it because it feels right, he does it to prove he can.

Doing something "manly" for the sake of looking like a man doesnt achieve anything.

It reminds me of a poem i read called "Satire"

in it one part goes like this:

"And yet he cries 'I am a chief,'
Therefore I know he is not one."

Think about that.

 

[PEACEDJ]

Wow, damn.. I must say after reading all the reply's I've discovered that there are real DJ's here who know what they are doing.

 

[bust.it]

I have one question for you guys:

I just opened the cover of The 48 Laws of Power last night and began reading.

here's the debate:

In his INTRODUCTION he says that in order to gain, observe or control power you need to be a man who wears many masks. Someone who can appeal to all types of people.

Are these two contradictory or do they support each other?

On the one hand you have the mentality to be yourself regardless of who you're with, to not let others shape you and to not ACT to FIT IN. On the other hand you have the idea of ADAPTATION to every situation (including behavior, appearance, language) for optimum control and results.

thoughts?

 

[Challenger]

Hi,
I really don't get pook's comparisons. Can somebody explain this to me?

Pook says:

MONAD- an indivisible unit that constitutes reality

The definition for monad on http://www.wikipedia.org is:

The word monad comes from the greek word ????? (from the word ?????, which means "one", "single", "unique") and has had many meanings in different contexts:

Among the Pythagoreans (followers of Pythagoras) the monad was the first thing that came into existence. The monad begat the dyad, which begat the numbers, the numbers begat points, which begat lines, which begat two-dimensional entities, which begat three-dimensional entities, which begat bodies, which begat the four elements earth, water, fire and air, from which the rest of our world is built up. The monad was thus a central concept in the cosmology of the Pythagoreans, who held the belief that the world was - literally - built up by numbers. (The source of this claim is Diogenes Laertius book Lives of Eminent Philosophers.)

Within certain variations of Gnosticism, especially those inspiered by Monoimus, the monad was the higher being which created lesser gods, or elements (similar to aeons). This view was according to Hippolytus inspired by the pythagoreans.

In the writings of the philosopher Gottfried Leibniz, the monads appear as spiritual entities which make up the essence of our world. They do not interact with our world (are "windowless"), and do not have volume (do not take up space) and are thus impossible to detect by scientific methods. The arrangements of the monads make up the faith and structure of this world, which to Leibniz was "the best of all possible worlds".

Within mathematics a monad is a set consisting of one single element.

In pure functional programming languages such as Haskell, monads are data types that encapsulate the functional I/O-activity, in such a manner that the side-effects of IO are not allowed to spread out of the part of the program that is not functional (imperative).

So monad is a symbol for unity (consisting of many parts), harmony, parts on which our earth exists?

In another dictionary I found out that relations between monads are always god's plan or god'S destiny. So they can'T determine what they like to do themselves but it is destiny.

Wouldn't that contradict to the idea of "being a man"?
I don't want to critise or anythink like this, I just wanted to understand why Pook uses the word "monad" in this context.

In a third source I found that the "Monad of the Monads" ist god himself. So how can you interpret this regarding

man's nature is to be a monad

Or is this interpretation not fitting here?


Considering the term "henid": I have never heard this one and couldn'T find anythink about this. Where is the term from (also greek?) and what does it mean exactly?

 

[Mack Of All Trades]

Let me break it down for ya man....


A monad (man) is someone who dares to be different. Who dares to change the world and not let it change him. He is a leader who doesnt care what others think of him or what everyone else is doing. He does his OWN thing and pursues HIS goals. I can definitely tell ya there is a shortage in real men today. Especially in High School, where everywhere you turn some "fake thug" is saying "G-unit" or talking like they live in tha hood.

Just being a man and a DJ will set you WAY above tha rest, man.

A henid(woman) is someone who is dependent on others, kinda like a wolf in a wolfpack. They at times can show leadership qualities like courage and cleverness, but they still cant function without their community. A henid finds it difficult to make their own decisions and follows the "alpha" in the group. Henids are only pieces of the puzzle, while a monad ("mono"=1) can exist by itself.

Being a DJ is striving to leave the jumble of henids that society creates with all its movies and shows that turn men into girly men. I remember when I first started I used to get picked on and had low confidence. I had never pulled a number and was too scared to touch chicks because of the B.S. I heard from chicks in society.

Now, after the help of my sosuave community members and the vernerable DJ bible, I have become a henid. I still have to rely on my parents for the basics like food and housing, but Im cool with that. Its the mentality that counts. Knowing that you are a totally new person who isnt afraid to be a leader.

When do you know youre a Don Juan? Its hard to explain.

But trust me. When you get there, youll know it.

 

[Zelemont]

Originally posted by Mack Of All Trades
Now, after the help of my sosuave community members and the vernerable DJ bible, I have become a henid.

Umm, congrats on becoming a henid.

 

[djbr]

bump

 

[LuciferSam]

Man oh man, this one of those rare life changing posts that appear on here, PeacedJ, Pook. I know exactly where you're coming from guys, its like you have acted as a mouth for what alot of other DJ's and I surely feel.

Becoming a Monad, acheiving greater heights emotionally, intelectually, spiritually, striving for ambition, not for anyone else, just yourself.
Its surprising just how looking for a quick way to get laid has led to becoming something more than what you were before, something more refined.

I hear Peacdj and Pook 100% here and I hope that any newcomers acknowledge this too. If they don't, a pox on them lol

 

[crumpiteer]

i got this articles from the net, which helps explains and reinforce the "Definition of a Man":

"According to Plato, the negation of existence is no other than matter. Form is the only real existence. For Plato form is the parent and creator of all reality. For Aristotle, in the sexual process the male principle is the active, formative agent, the female principle the passive matter on which the form is impressed. In my view, the significance of woman in humanity is explained by the Platonic and Aristotelian conception. Woman is the material on which man acts. Man as the microcosm is compounded of the lower and higher life. Woman is matter, is nothing.

"... Man is form, woman is matter"

"...Matter needs to be formed: and thus woman demands that man should clear her confusion of thought, give meaning to her henid ideas. Women are matter, which can assume any shape.

"...This accounts for what has been called woman's submissiveness, the way she is influenced by the opinions of others, her suggestibility, the way in which man moulds her formless nature. Woman is nothing; therefore, and only, therefore, she can become everything, whilst man can only remain what he is. A man can make what he likes of a woman: the most a woman can do is to help a man to achieve what he wants.

"...Women have neither this nor that characteristic; their peculiarity consists in having no characteristics at all; the complexity and terrible mystery about women come to this; it is this which makes them above and beyond man's understanding - man, who always wants to get to the heart of things.

"...The idea of maleness consists in the fact of an individuality, of an essential monad, and is covered by it. Each monad, however, is as different as possible from every other monad, and therefore cannot be classified in one comprehensive idea common to many other monads. Man is the microcosm; he contains all kinds of possibilities. This must not be confused with the universal susceptibility of woman who becomes all without being anything, whilst man is all, as much or as little, according to his gifts, as he will. Man contains woman, for he contains matter, and he can allow this part of his nature to develop itself, ie, to thrive and enervate him; or he can recognise and fight against it - so that he, and he alone, can get at the truth about woman. But woman cannot develop except through man.

"The meaning of man and woman is first arrived at when we examine their mutual sexual and erotic relations. Woman's deepest desire is to be formed by man, and so to receive her being. Woman desires that man should impart opinions to her quite different to those she held before, she is content to let herself be turned by him from what she had till then thought right. She wishes to be taken to pieces as a whole, so that he may build her up again.

"...Woman is first created by man's will - he dominates her and changes her whole being (hypnotism). Here is the explanation of the relation of the psychical to the physical in man and woman. Man assumes a reciprocal action of body and mind, in the sense rather that the dominant mind creates the body, than that the mind merely projects itself on phenomena, whilst the woman accepts both mental and psychical phenomena empirically. None the less, even in the woman there is some reciprocal action. However, whilst in the man, as Schopenhauer truly taught, the human being is his own creation, his own will makes and re-makes the body, the woman is bodily influenced and changed by an alien will (suggestion).

"Man not only forms himself, but woman also - a far easier matter. The myths of the book of Genesis and other cosmogonies, which teach that woman was created out of man, are nearer the truth than the biological theories of descent, according to which males have been evolved from females.

"...The supremest moment in a woman's life, when her original nature, her natural desire manifests itself, is that in which her own sexual union takes place. She embraces the man passionately and presses him to her; it is the greatest joy of passivity, stronger even than the contented feeling of a hypnotised person, the desire of matter which has just been formed, and wishes to keep that form for ever. That is why a woman is so grateful to her possessor, even if the gratitude is limited to the moment, as in the case of prostitutes with no memory, or, if it lasts longer, as in the case of more highly differentiated women.

"This endless striving of the poor to attach themselves to riches, the altogether formless and therefore super-individual striving of the inarticulate to obtain form by contact, to keep it indefinitely and so gain an existence, is the deepest motive in pairing.

"Pairing is only possible because woman is not a monad, and has no sense of individuality; it is the endless striving of nothing to be something.

"It is thus that the duality of man and woman has gradually developed into complete dualism, to the dualism of the higher and lower lives, of subject and object, of form and matter, something and nothing. All metaphysical, all transcendental existence is logical and moral existence; woman is non-logical and non-moral. She has no dislike for what is logical and moral, she is not anti-logical, she is not anti-moral. She is not the negation, she is, rather, nothing. She is neither the affirmation nor the denial. A man has in himself the possibility of being the absolute something or the absolute nothing, and therefore his actions are directed towards the one or the other; woman does not sin, for she herself is the sin which is a possibility in man.

"The abstract male is the image of God, the absolute something; the female, and the female element in the male, is the symbol of nothing; that is the significance of the woman in the universe, and in this way male and female complete and condition one another. Woman has a meaning and a function in the universe as the opposite of man; and as the human male surpasses the animal male, so the human female surpasses the female of zoology. It is not that limited existence and limited negation (as in the animal kingdom) are at war in humanity; what there stand in opposition are unlimited existence and unlimited negation. And so male and female make up humanity.

"The meaning of woman is to be meaningless. She represents negation, the opposite pole from the Godhead, the other possibility of humanity.

"...All the qualities of woman depend on her non-existence, on her want of character

"...Thus the three fundamental characters of woman with which this chapter has dealt come together in the conception of her as the non-existent. Her instability and untruthfulness are only negative deductions from the premiss of her nonexistence. Her only positive character, the conception of her as the pairing agent, comes from it by a simple process of analysis. The nature of woman is no more than pairing, no more than super- individual sexuality.

"...Thus comes about the domination of the male sexuality over the female. It is only when man is sexual that woman has existence and meaning.

"Her existence is bound up with the Phallus, and so that is her supreme lord and welcome master.

 

[Johnty]

bump

 

[vagrant]

i got some work to do. after reading some of the greatest post on this thread i realized that i'm a monad but a henid when it comes to a relationship with females and i understand that i need some change. my girlfriend is a keeper but it's either my way or the highway.

 

[matygee]

This is A VERY important thread.
It should be stickied.

 

[vagrant]

sorry but i'm to the dating game

do women like DJs?!?!?!...stupid question i know but i need to know cuz if i want to be a DJ and improve my self it's because not only i'd want to be happy but also have that girl i can always keep...

 

[matygee]

do women like DJs?!?!?!...stupid question i know but i need to know cuz if i want to be a DJ and improve my self it's because not only i'd want to be happy but also have that girl i can always keep...

listen my friend, you like many others are missing the point. I'm not going to say I understand it completely, but I do understand it. The fact of the matter is a DJ does not base his happiness on having a woman. That is the first rule. Your happiness is based on WHAT YOU LIKE, not on a woman. A woman is a side-dish to the full order menu of what LIFE has TO OFFER YOU. Basically a Don Juan dosen't need to KEEP his girlfriend because shew will want to KEEP HIM. But for her to want to keep him he has to be a prize. That is up to you, whether you want to be the prize in your own eyes. Follow what fullfills you, follow what makes you happy and eventually you will become the prize. Remember that dude.