stalluproar
Senior Don Juan
I have been putting together a list of common situations that guys run into when it comes to females. I also listed ways to handle the situation. By no means is this list complete. Post if you have anything to add. I will update this list if something good is posted. I am putting this together as a reference in case my skills go stail and thought I would share it with everyone else.
Default Situations and How to Deal with Them:
1. Hot girl makes long eye contact with you out in public:
• Hold eye contact until she breaks it first. If she is close to you, say to her, “Hey, you could just come up to me and say Hi”
2. When a girl stands around you, makes little or no eye contact:
• Go up and ask her if she is shy, because you have been standing there for 10 minutes and she hasn’t even said hi yet.
• You know, you are kind of scaring me by lurking around like that. You could just say Hi so I don’t think you are some sort of creep.
3. You see a girl making out with a guy in front of you:
• “Come on, you don’t have to make me jealous. You could just come over and say Hi.”
4. A girl asks you to buy her a drink:
• Sorry, but women usually buy ME drinks.
• I’ll buy a drink (go buy one for yourself) then say to her it is ironic that I am wasting your time.
• Hmmm are you trying to hit on me, that seems to be the only pick-up line you girls know.
• Oh, so what you're telling me is that you like men who basically pay for your attention with drinks... how romantic.
• Wow you’re coming on strong! I don’t buy girls drinks but you can buy ME one!
5. Girl asks you any type of boring question while in public (done when she spontaneously comes up to you):
• Immediately turn it around to “So what are you doing later?”
• Is that your best pickup line? You struck me as someone more creative than that.
6. Girl says I have a boyfriend:
• Really, when is the wedding date?
• That must be an accomplishment, want me to call Ripley’s Believe it or not?
• You know, that kind of is a normal thing. I wouldn’t brag about it to every stranger I see.
7. Girl says I’ll call you (instead of you calling her) after you asked if she is free:
• I probably will be out with someone else by the time you call.
• Since I am busy, I should call you or you will get very close and personal with my voicemail.
8. Girl calls to cancel after setting up date:
• Tell her, OK, your loss. Call me when you are available (don’t call her back).
• Tell her that disappointing. Oh well, I guess you won’t be having any fun tonight. Call me when you are available.
• Tell her to cancel her plans, because I am more fun.
9. Girl says I just want to be friends or not looking for a relationship:
• Who ever said we were going to get in a relationship?
• Fhew, I was beginning to think you were coming on to me too strong.
10. Girl says you aren’t getting laid:
• Well, YOU'RE the one who just mentioned it... you have a dirty mind
• Sex?? Hmm… Since you brought it up, you must be frustrated.
11. Girl says I love you:
• I love me too
• You should, now kiss me
• I know
12. Girl says give me your number after you ask for hers:
• I don’t give my number out
• I don’t want you calling me ten times a day
• No way, I have enough stalkers as it is
• If continued resistance, I guess we are at an impass
13. When a girl sits down next to you:
• Tell her that seat is taken, but if she entertains you, she might be able to stay
14. Girl asks you what you do for a living:
• Tell her something off the wall (you are an underwear model, parachute packer, etc)
• You mean how much money I make
• You couldn’t handle it
• Tell me a good story and I might tell you
15. When setting up a first meeting, the girl refuses to go meet you for coffee (or whatever you wanted to go) and counters with an activity that involves being in a group (usually her friends):
• Don’t play down to her level, tell her you are going [to your spot] anyway. Tell her she is welcome to join, if not, I don’t think this is going to work.
• Tell her you don’t want her friends fighting over you.
16. Girl asks if you are a player:
• It takes one to know one
• I know you like it
17. When a girl does something clumsy (out on a date or in public):
• Geez, I can’t take you anywhere, can I? (date only)
• I can’t believe you just did that
• Wow, you’re clumsy. I bet you wouldn’t be a good kisser either.
18. Girl says why are you looking/staring at her:
• Tell her you can’t figure out how her roots in her hair are dyed brunette, and she must be very skilled doing that (when she is a blonde)
• Tell you can’t figure out how her shoes match her outfit, because I beginning to think to call the fashion police (There are endless possibilities here to find some flaw)
• Obviously you have been checking me out. Instead of being mean, you could just say Hi.
Default Situations and How to Deal with Them:
1. Hot girl makes long eye contact with you out in public:
• Hold eye contact until she breaks it first. If she is close to you, say to her, “Hey, you could just come up to me and say Hi”
2. When a girl stands around you, makes little or no eye contact:
• Go up and ask her if she is shy, because you have been standing there for 10 minutes and she hasn’t even said hi yet.
• You know, you are kind of scaring me by lurking around like that. You could just say Hi so I don’t think you are some sort of creep.
3. You see a girl making out with a guy in front of you:
• “Come on, you don’t have to make me jealous. You could just come over and say Hi.”
4. A girl asks you to buy her a drink:
• Sorry, but women usually buy ME drinks.
• I’ll buy a drink (go buy one for yourself) then say to her it is ironic that I am wasting your time.
• Hmmm are you trying to hit on me, that seems to be the only pick-up line you girls know.
• Oh, so what you're telling me is that you like men who basically pay for your attention with drinks... how romantic.
• Wow you’re coming on strong! I don’t buy girls drinks but you can buy ME one!
5. Girl asks you any type of boring question while in public (done when she spontaneously comes up to you):
• Immediately turn it around to “So what are you doing later?”
• Is that your best pickup line? You struck me as someone more creative than that.
6. Girl says I have a boyfriend:
• Really, when is the wedding date?
• That must be an accomplishment, want me to call Ripley’s Believe it or not?
• You know, that kind of is a normal thing. I wouldn’t brag about it to every stranger I see.
7. Girl says I’ll call you (instead of you calling her) after you asked if she is free:
• I probably will be out with someone else by the time you call.
• Since I am busy, I should call you or you will get very close and personal with my voicemail.
8. Girl calls to cancel after setting up date:
• Tell her, OK, your loss. Call me when you are available (don’t call her back).
• Tell her that disappointing. Oh well, I guess you won’t be having any fun tonight. Call me when you are available.
• Tell her to cancel her plans, because I am more fun.
9. Girl says I just want to be friends or not looking for a relationship:
• Who ever said we were going to get in a relationship?
• Fhew, I was beginning to think you were coming on to me too strong.
10. Girl says you aren’t getting laid:
• Well, YOU'RE the one who just mentioned it... you have a dirty mind
• Sex?? Hmm… Since you brought it up, you must be frustrated.
11. Girl says I love you:
• I love me too
• You should, now kiss me
• I know
12. Girl says give me your number after you ask for hers:
• I don’t give my number out
• I don’t want you calling me ten times a day
• No way, I have enough stalkers as it is
• If continued resistance, I guess we are at an impass
13. When a girl sits down next to you:
• Tell her that seat is taken, but if she entertains you, she might be able to stay
14. Girl asks you what you do for a living:
• Tell her something off the wall (you are an underwear model, parachute packer, etc)
• You mean how much money I make
• You couldn’t handle it
• Tell me a good story and I might tell you
15. When setting up a first meeting, the girl refuses to go meet you for coffee (or whatever you wanted to go) and counters with an activity that involves being in a group (usually her friends):
• Don’t play down to her level, tell her you are going [to your spot] anyway. Tell her she is welcome to join, if not, I don’t think this is going to work.
• Tell her you don’t want her friends fighting over you.
16. Girl asks if you are a player:
• It takes one to know one
• I know you like it
17. When a girl does something clumsy (out on a date or in public):
• Geez, I can’t take you anywhere, can I? (date only)
• I can’t believe you just did that
• Wow, you’re clumsy. I bet you wouldn’t be a good kisser either.
18. Girl says why are you looking/staring at her:
• Tell her you can’t figure out how her roots in her hair are dyed brunette, and she must be very skilled doing that (when she is a blonde)
• Tell you can’t figure out how her shoes match her outfit, because I beginning to think to call the fashion police (There are endless possibilities here to find some flaw)
• Obviously you have been checking me out. Instead of being mean, you could just say Hi.
Last edited:
