Dealing with other mens verbal abuse

[ManlyMan]

I tend to just usually ignore the person.

I feel this is weak way to handle it. However there are worse ways to handle it.

I feel that this way tends to make onlookers lose respect for you.

I have read about various different guru's advice.

steve jabba says to be very assertive.

others say just say whatever you want but don't be reactive.

Others say the high value person would usually just ignore it.

Others say it doesn't even matter.

they all contradict each other a little.

I feel this is important to handle these situaltions appropriatley as it ties in with social status and attracting women. Other men can ****block you like this too. You have to have good standing social status to pick up the women.

I lack appropriate social skills to deal with this.

So how do you handle verbal abuse from other men without losing the respect of others. Thanks for the replies.

 

[MatureDJ]

Be assertive, and you might wind up with a bullet where you don't want it. The solution is just not associate with such folks, such that the only way someone is going to be assertive is if he is a criminal trying to harm you.

 

[Stanley]

Brush it off and remain unphased and indifferent, it isn't weak behavior to defuse conflict and not entertain someone's attempts at belittling you. There are times where a line must be drawn and you need to verbally standup for yourself, but oftentimes petty remarks and ad hominem are a waste of time.

 

[Deranged]

Who cares? It's your ego talking. Will what happened matter in 5 mins? a month? 100 years?
If you've properly read the situation and want to entertain yourself and get involved, go for it. There may be consequences to your actions. good or bad. Will it be worth it, or time better spent elsewhere?

 

[Pierce Manhammer]

Walk away, and stay out of venues with people that act that way. Upgrade your scene, this type of behavior is not allowed by staff at better venues.

 

[Robert28]

I’ll give you a tip about this kind of thing. It’s not the loud guy who’s insulting you that you have to be afraid of, it’s the quiet guy minding his own business who will fvck you up. Sometimes with the loud guys you just have to get nose to nose and look then dead in the eye like you’re 3 seconds away from killing them. Don’t go doing this ALL the time but I’m saying if the situation ever comes to that and you’ve tried walking away but can’t, step right up to them face to face and done say a word. Soon as you do that, smile or kinda of laugh. I promise you it won’t escalate from there, dude will think you’re nuts and night anpologize and buy you a drink. I was in a lot of bars back in the day, I’ve seen a lot of stuff.

 

[Epicwinguy]

I'm surprised at these threads, I would think most guys here would say that the only good way to handle the situation would be to have better insults to hurl at the other guy.

 

[The Duke]

I tend to just usually ignore the person.

I feel this is weak way to handle it. However there are worse ways to handle it.

I feel that this way tends to make onlookers lose respect for you.

I have read about various different guru's advice.

steve jabba says to be very assertive.

others say just say whatever you want but don't be reactive.

Others say the high value person would usually just ignore it.

Others say it doesn't even matter.

they all contradict each other a little.

I feel this is important to handle these situaltions appropriatley as it ties in with social status and attracting women. Other men can ****block you like this too. You have to have good standing social status to pick up the women.

I lack appropriate social skills to deal with this.

So how do you handle verbal abuse from other men without losing the respect of others. Thanks for the replies.

Is it your stature, frame, voice, people you hang around with?

Can you elaborate on some examples?

There used to be this meathead bully that hung out in my social circle. He was so over the top fake alpha, big puzzy under the surface.

I never backed down to him and gave his schitt talk right back to him. I was never one of. His cheerleaders either. Eventually he backed down.

 

[ManlyMan]

Is it your stature, frame, voice, people you hang around with?

Can you elaborate on some examples?

There used to be this meathead bully that hung out in my social circle. He was so over the top fake alpha, big puzzy under the surface.

I never backed down to him and gave his schitt talk right back to him. I was never one of. His cheerleaders either. Eventually he backed down.

I am 6 foot tall. It is probably the way I carry myself. I am a very non threatening vibe. Not nice guyish. Just non threatening.Some people are joking for people they can screw with I think. However it almost never happens. However I do like to know how to handle myself as best as possible. It always throws me for a loop when someone is disrespectful. Also could probably change the places I hangout at sometimes. Men are usually strangers.

 

[eli77]

been in these situations catch them alone and try to avoid any physical confrontation.

 

[Murk]

Be ready to escalate to violence and defend yourself, or be a b1tch like many here want you to be like them. There are only alphas and betas. If you get abused by other men and keep walking away your girl might leave and you might hang yourself for being such a b1tch.

I’m serious, I’ve heard of people killing themselves from being bullied. Which is what we are talking about here, grown men being bullied. Seems like people are ok with being bullied, to each their own.

 

[BeExcellent]

Let’s back up. What is prompting the question OP?

Why do you ask? What are men doing that is causing this thread.

Be specific.

Your dad? Your brother? Your friend? Your boss? Your coworker? The neighborhood drunk? Total strangers? Without these details it’s impossible to help.

 

[Alvafe]

I tend to just usually ignore the person.

I feel this is weak way to handle it. However there are worse ways to handle it.

I feel that this way tends to make onlookers lose respect for you.

I have read about various different guru's advice.

steve jabba says to be very assertive.

others say just say whatever you want but don't be reactive.

Others say the high value person would usually just ignore it.

Others say it doesn't even matter.

they all contradict each other a little.

I feel this is important to handle these situaltions appropriatley as it ties in with social status and attracting women. Other men can ****block you like this too. You have to have good standing social status to pick up the women.

I lack appropriate social skills to deal with this.

So how do you handle verbal abuse from other men without losing the respect of others. Thanks for the replies.

how? simple you don't or you make him feel bad or you walk away

 

[ManlyMan]

Let’s back up. What is prompting the question OP?

Why do you ask? What are men doing that is causing this thread.

Be specific.

Your dad? Your brother? Your friend? Your boss? Your coworker? The neighborhood drunk? Total strangers? Without these details it’s impossible to help.

I am not looking for specific advice for a specific situation.there is not a specific scenario I am talking about. I am speaking with a very broad question on how to deal with rude men. It almost never happens. I just wanna learn how to handle myself better. And I got my answer people here either ignore them or beat them up for the most part. or defuse it someway. I think you are not completely understanding the type of answer I am looking for. Thats ok it just means you dont know.

As a sidenote. I am not certain you are a really women. You are definitely making feel like you are a gay guy impersonating a woman or something. I mean if women actually hung out at places like this there would be a ton of them here. so if you don't mind refrain from messaging me.

 

[RazorRambo24]

It's important to understand that most things people say to each other are never personal. Unless it's coming from a place of pure hatred, violence or malice, you shouldn't take anything serious.

But as to answer your question.. there are going to be times where people are rude to you.. and you just either 1) put them in their place 2) acknowledge it with pure wit or win them over with your sense of humor, cool and calm demeanor 3) let them have that little gratification and gain light.

Put them in their place would be to do something that literally makes them look bad/ or puss out or show the them they are inferior to you..and usually poses a challenge, to which the guy can fold or take on the challenge. Real tough guys never want to fight and will give you many outs and pose a challenge back to you , usually as a warning and allow you to exit the situation in one or more ways.

The ultimate is 3) believe it or not.. Because it takes alot of discipline as a man to just let another man being rude to you for no reason go and just let it brush off your shoulder like some dust

Those who act rude to you either are 1) having a bad day 2) trying to be ****y and tough 3) juiced up and stupid and thus this is the only time the can do something like this so they take advantage of it, mostly to appease their ego and show off to those around them, aka fulfill their ego still

I'm a smaller guy 5'10, 170 lbs, i got a nice physique but always been a little on the slim side, and i've had one or two times where people def tested me/were rude to me.. Ofc, im not the guy to mess with and they quickly find out.. But lets not toot my own horn..

 

[ManFromTartarus]

As a sidenote. I am not certain you are a really women. You are definitely making feel like you are a gay guy impersonating a woman or something. I mean if women actually hung out at places like this there would be a ton of them here. so if you don't mind refrain from messaging me.

Someone's trying to help you and all you do is insult them? Get your head out of your azz. Now I see why men are insulting you.

 

[2Rocky]

First Question to yourself: "Can I do anything about this?" Usually it is NO you can't. It's that guy's problem. His anger, his insecurity, his frustration. You tell yourself "you can't out-piss a skunk" and go on about your day.

Now if the guys verbal attack is preventing you from doing what you need to, or putting you in a position where you need to defend or refute him, you might have to counter with a pithy statement. It still isn't your responsibility but it is now your problem. I'd recommend not engaging on his platform , in his frame but, calling to the attention of nearby outlookers that he is out of line and behaving poorly. Address the behavior, not the insult. Do not threaten.

 

[Epicwinguy]

It's pretty important to be good at verbal conflict to attract women. In fact it's why I struggle, lol

 

[BeExcellent]

I am not looking for specific advice for a specific situation.there is not a specific scenario I am talking about. I am speaking with a very broad question on how to deal with rude men. It almost never happens. I just wanna learn how to handle myself better. And I got my answer people here either ignore them or beat them up for the most part. or defuse it someway. I think you are not completely understanding the type of answer I am looking for. Thats ok it just means you dont know.

As a sidenote. I am not certain you are a really women. You are definitely making feel like you are a gay guy impersonating a woman or something. I mean if women actually hung out at places like this there would be a ton of them here. so if you don't mind refrain from messaging me.

I assure I am 100% female. Been around here for years (my avatar photo is me at 51 years old, by the way.) You have an ignore button. Feel welcome to use it.

It is strange that you are asking this question without some kind of reason it came up. Self confident men (and women too) are not sitting around ruminating about this sort of thing. It doesn't even make my radar, I mean who cares? I don't give rude people a second thought, and very rarely is anyone rude to me as I carry myself with confidence. If someone is? OK, that's on them. I don't ever allow someone else's bad day or bad attitude to affect me.

And neither should you.

 

[Barrister]

I tend to just usually ignore the person.

I feel this is weak way to handle it. However there are worse ways to handle it.

I feel that this way tends to make onlookers lose respect for you.

I have read about various different guru's advice.

steve jabba says to be very assertive.

others say just say whatever you want but don't be reactive.

Others say the high value person would usually just ignore it.

Others say it doesn't even matter.

they all contradict each other a little.

I feel this is important to handle these situaltions appropriatley as it ties in with social status and attracting women. Other men can ****block you like this too. You have to have good standing social status to pick up the women.

I lack appropriate social skills to deal with this.

So how do you handle verbal abuse from other men without losing the respect of others. Thanks for the replies.

It is difficult to answer this question with zero context. If it is some drunk guy spouting nonsense then who cares. Laugh at him and then move on. However, generally speaking never let another man talk down to you without dishing it back. If it is another man calling me out in front of others, especially professionally, no way will I let that slide. I am not looking to start a physical altercation, but I am certainly not going to sit there mute like I am afraid to respond. The "just ignore them" advice sounds good in principle, but you look very weak if you just sit there and take it.

No one is going to stand up for you outside of yourself. So you need to do it.