dealing with a chick who goes distant after sex

[iliketennis]

met a 20 yr old solid 8 about two weeks ago when i was out of town on business. the next week she texted me every morning, during lunch, after work, etc. very high interest levels. i drove back last weekend to see her again, we banged and it was awesome. we spent the night together and she said she'd miss me etc.

the next morning she didn't wanna have sex again. we left the hotel and she said she would miss me. i left town. she didn't contact me again until today, over facebook chat. we talked for a while. she said she found a wife for me jokingly, and when i asked why her plan to marry me changed (which she had joked about before) she said we'd be BFFs. i said that'd be great and the conversation drifted off.

next? no contact? what's the move here?

 

[Real Talk]

It's probably awkward because the relationship hasn't been defined yet. 20 is still pretty young so having sex without really knowing whats going on between you two might be making her uncomfortable. Have you made clear to her that its strictly casual, possible LTR, FB etc. whatever it may be?

and keep in mind that if a girl is uncomfortable for any reason she will bail.

 

[BBbardot]

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[bukowski_merit]

the next morning she didn't wanna have sex again.

Maybe she was sore from the night before :woo:

A lot of women give "token resistance" to morning sex for some reason. My favorite response, "ok... im going to feel you and if you're not wet - we don't have sex. If you are wet - im going to break you." and then play the game from there (hint: she's most likely going to get wet from you feeling her, even if she wasn't.)

we left the hotel and she said she would miss me. i left town. she didn't contact me again until today, over facebook chat. we talked for a while. she said she found a wife for me jokingly, and when i asked why her plan to marry me changed (which she had joked about before)

Would have been better if you had asked her more about this "wife" she found instead of taking the "what about you?" bait....

she said we'd be BFFs. i said that'd be great and the conversation drifted off.

"That'd be great"????

Come on... throw some effort into it...

ME: "Put another F in it and we'll be good."
HER: "BFFFs"
ME: "Yeah, .... " (at this point make her guess, and play with it. before revealing...)

"Best friends fvcking forever... ... ... but you probably couldn't handle that much fvcking, could ya?"


Work at it...

 

[iliketennis]

i did ask her about the wife. she said it was a hooker on her street and we joked about it a little before i asked about her plans to marry me...

i also told her that i had seen the new movie 'no strings attached' the other night (with another plate, but i didn't mention that.) she said that she liked that movie and "she wanted that" - which i'm assuming means a no strings relationship.

 

[Rethnu]

1) no serious relationship, if a person, no matter if male or female can't talk about important things any relationship would be a waste of time IMHO.

2) keep her as a f*ck buddy, but you'll have to accept that she'll be complicated to deal with

 

[iliketennis]

i have logs of the facebook chat from tonight. is anyone willing to let me PM it to them and critique it for me? i need to see where i'm sounding like an AFC

 

[schttrj]

I have a question for you: are you willing to spend this much energy on just a 8?

 

[SharinganUser]

You nailed a woman and she left the next morning without wanting to cuddle or discuss her feelings, ect...

I don't see what the problem is...

 

[bukowski_merit]

i did ask her about the wife. she said it was a hooker on her street and we joked about it a little before i asked about her plans to marry me...

The first part is good, and as long as you played with her over it - that's fine. But again, asking her why she changed her plans is not neccesary and can come off as needy.

i also told her that i had seen the new movie 'no strings attached' the other night (with another plate, but i didn't mention that.) she said that she liked that movie and "she wanted that" - which i'm assuming means a no strings relationship.

This woman has pretty good game. I like her

She actually seems pretty good at push/pull.

i have logs of the facebook chat from tonight. is anyone willing to let me PM it to them and critique it for me? i need to see where i'm sounding like an AFC

You can send it to me, or just post it on here. I can't promise a timely response, but i'll get around to it.

 

[vatoloco]

i did ask her about the wife. she said it was a hooker on her street and we joked about it a little before i asked about her plans to marry me...

The first part is good, and as long as you played with her over it - that's fine. But again, asking her why she changed her plans is not neccesary and can come off as needy.

Yep.

ILT, something you might want to incorporate into future texts of this nature is "Agree & Amplify."

Her: "Hey ILT, I found you a wife!"
You: "Really? Cool! When's our first threesome?"

 

[The College Jock]

Forget all that conscious perception in trying to win her back.

Next time you speak to her, tell her this.

You:"You know what I think is so f*cking hot about you?"
Her: "What?"
You: "Most girls get all weird and clingy after you have sex and they try to push you into a relationship, but your not like that. I think that is so f*cking sexy. I can't stand girls who do that."

She will be frustrated inside, but will have a hard time combating that and will passively accept it.