Day Game: dealing with the security guys

[Matt Rogers]

Ive given up alcohol so the bar/club scene is becoming less appealing so I have branched out into trying to meet girls during the day. I'm particularly fond of bookshops because I love to read and my ideal girl would be beautiful and intellectual.

Unfortunately I had the shock of my life when a security guy chucked me out saying he'd been watching me on CCTV hit on at least ten different women and he did not like me disturbing his customers who had come here to shop not talk to men.

I wrote this off to bad luck but then another time I was hitting on a few girls in a coffee shop and one of the staff again had a word with me and told me to leave their customers alone.

I live in the UK where there is very much a social convention that you do not talk to strangers except in bars and clubs so I can understand how these people are interpreting my actions as antisocial. But at the end of the day it is their store and they can be as unreasonable as they like and get away with it.

Anyone else experienced this and how did you get around it?

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

Wow thats flat out stupid! Are there any areas where the security guards are less?
Afew of the guys i talk to who live in the UK don't really have that kind of problem when doing day approaches.

Hmmm for approaches, u could sit down with her. That way, u don't be seen as bothering them...but what load of crap is that? . Those employees must have a lot of time on their hands if they even give a sh1t about that.

 

[Scars]

You approached 10+ woman and still going back to the same place? Try some new territory. There's not much you can do about a security guard being a prick.

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

Yea, Scars is right. try all sorts of places around. Thats what i do. When i do mall game, i switch between two to three malls.

 

[daygameguy]

The advice here is probably the best thing to do.

But how DO you handle situations with security like that?

Options:
1. Tip him.
2. Talk to the manager.
3. Make a girl like you, enjoy your company, and let her shut up the security.

 

[Sir_Turtle]

agreed. Its a pity the UK is like that. Here in southern America it's by no means abnormal to start a friendly conversation with a stranger so i can't say I've experienced this.

try being more subtle about it, If you do ten women in a row probably all within the space of an hour or so I can understand the shop owners feeling as if your harassing their customers.

 

[Drewskie]

That seems kind of odd, that the security would actually say something. Unless one or more of the girls complained, why would he be watching you?? Here in the states we have big bookstores that people sometimes hang out in all day, and nobody really cares. Same with starbucks coffee shops. If you were to hang out in a place and randomly talk to girls, maybe it would work out better than walking around as if you were trying to target them directly. Do any show interest?? I am thinking about trying this myself.

 

[Cry For Love]

Ive given up alcohol so the bar/club scene is becoming less appealing so I have branched out into trying to meet girls during the day. I'm particularly fond of bookshops because I love to read and my ideal girl would be beautiful and intellectual.

Unfortunately I had the shock of my life when a security guy chucked me out saying he'd been watching me on CCTV hit on at least ten different women and he did not like me disturbing his customers who had come here to shop not talk to men.

I wrote this off to bad luck but then another time I was hitting on a few girls in a coffee shop and one of the staff again had a word with me and told me to leave their customers alone.

I live in the UK where there is very much a social convention that you do not talk to strangers except in bars and clubs so I can understand how these people are interpreting my actions as antisocial. But at the end of the day it is their store and they can be as unreasonable as they like and get away with it.

Anyone else experienced this and how did you get around it?

Open with some c&f on the security guard, add DHV and run a couple of NLP routines, then make him introduce you to a hot sales clerk and the game is on :yes:

 

[Warrior74]

Stop hitting on women.


Are you getting any eye contact and choosing signs from these women or are you just going up to random women who are minding their own business with PUA mystery style tactics? If it's the latter then yes it's creepy and you deserve to be booted. If you see a woman checking you out ( who you like), then you go talk to her. If she's minding her own business, not even noticing you, leave her alone. It's common sense which is oh so uncommon around here.

I heard reports of guys sarging in germany who have gotten banned from the train stations for harrassing women. You have to learn to be smooth in your game and not act so overtly and hamfisted. Good luck.

 

[Smack]

Stop hitting on women.


Are you getting any eye contact and choosing signs from these women or are you just going up to random women who are minding their own business with PUA mystery style tactics? If it's the latter then yes it's creepy and you deserve to be booted. If you see a woman checking you out ( who you like), then you go talk to her. If she's minding her own business, not even noticing you, leave her alone. It's common sense which is oh so uncommon around here.

I heard reports of guys sarging in germany who have gotten banned from the train stations for harrassing women. You have to learn to be smooth in your game and not act so overtly and hamfisted. Good luck.

Yeah.

Approaching random women who are trying to get about their day to day life minding their own business in a country where talking to strangers outside of the bar/club scene is considered rude and antisocial is a recipe for failure.

And thus you do fail and get kicked out for harassing customers.

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

Stop hitting on women.


Are you getting any eye contact and choosing signs from these women or are you just going up to random women who are minding their own business with PUA mystery style tactics? If it's the latter then yes it's creepy and you deserve to be booted. If you see a woman checking you out ( who you like), then you go talk to her. If she's minding her own business, not even noticing you, leave her alone. It's common sense which is oh so uncommon around here.

I disagree with the stop hitting on women bit. Using mystery routines during the day is pointless and retarded i agree, but being more sincere and genuine with a cold approach will prolly be better with that.

I heard reports of guys sarging in germany who have gotten banned from the train stations for harrassing women. You have to learn to be smooth in your game and not act so overtly and hamfisted. Good luck.

They must've done it in a super retarded way.

 

[Mike32ct]

You should be looking for eye contact first, as another poster mentioned.

If you MUST cold approach, I wouldn't do more than one or two approaches and then leave.

Ten was way too many and will set off red flags in the staffs' minds.

I'm from the Northeast USA and we have a similar problem. It is considered weird and possibly even creepy to approach strangers outside of a bar/club.

 

[Matt Rogers]

Thanks for the feedback guys.

I got into day game because of the Paul Janka phenomenen on the internet. Im still learning so there is probably an element of awkwardness to my approaches that is setting things off.

You make a great point about trying to get some form of non-verbal invitation before going in and starting a conversation. That might have been where Im going wrong.

Definitely the cold approach aspect makes it hit or miss because while some of the girls smile and are very willing to engage in conversation (Ive even gotten a few numbers and dates) or at the least compliment me on my boldness before mentioning a boyfriend, others can be like "Do I know you?"

The volume thing isn't in my favour either as starting a conversation with one stranger can be construed as being friendly whereas if a security guy sees me starting multiple conversations over a given time period it is going to arouse suspicion.

So yeah I think Im going to try and get a smile before approaching and limit myself to a couple of approaches in any given store and try and rotate so the security guys do not see a pattern.

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

You should be looking for eye contact first, as another poster mentioned.

If you MUST cold approach, I wouldn't do more than one or two approaches and then leave.

Ten was way too many and will set off red flags in the staffs' minds.

I'm from the Northeast USA and we have a similar problem. It is considered weird and possibly even creepy to approach strangers outside of a bar/club.

TC, its prolly just the way the approaches go and no....he doesn't have to look for eye contact. TC, do you smile when u approach? Do u have a positive vibe? Most women aren't gonna even be able to see you when ur walking around at a mall...so how do you expect to get Eye contact from them? Plus, some who you might bone later...just didn't know how attracted they were to you.

But for Mike, if its a "SMALL" Store with barely any women....then sure...doing 2 and leaving is fine as there aren't really any. But if its a big store, he can do as many as he wants. But C'mon Mike, "Its considered weird and possibly even creepy to approach strangers outside of a bar/club" is BULLSH1T in every mile. If you have the vibe of a creeper or are afraid that u'll be seen as such, then possibly...BUT if you do it in a "I'm doing what i want" manner....u'll be fine.

I've done The Galleria Mall in Cambridge MASS, approached there all day and did not get kicked out or be considered creepy. If you want an example of a case where its the so-called "Creepiest" situation.... Try this, go up to the hottest woman in an ALL FEMALE clothing store, with other females around. Go up to her, if she's laughing and smiling...Watch the other reactions of the women AROUND her. Do you honestly think they'll look at you in a creepy way? haha...hell no....they'll show attraction in their eyes or just not even care. I rest my case

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

Thanks for the feedback guys.

I got into day game because of the Paul Janka phenomenen on the internet. Im still learning so there is probably an element of awkwardness to my approaches that is setting things off.

You make a great point about trying to get some form of non-verbal invitation before going in and starting a conversation. That might have been where Im going wrong.

Definitely the cold approach aspect makes it hit or miss because while some of the girls smile and are very willing to engage in conversation (Ive even gotten a few numbers and dates) or at the least compliment me on my boldness before mentioning a boyfriend, others can be like "Do I know you?"

The volume thing isn't in my favour either as starting a conversation with one stranger can be construed as being friendly whereas if a security guy sees me starting multiple conversations over a given time period it is going to arouse suspicion.

So yeah I think Im going to try and get a smile before approaching and limit myself to a couple of approaches in any given store and try and rotate so the security guys do not see a pattern.

Paul Janka's day game is pretty good i'd say. But yea, only do a few per store unless its a BIG store.

 

[Smack]

I live in the states...I've never encountered this...I'm thinking that either the UK needs to lighten up a bit or you're just a really creepy dude who's getting his just desserts. I'm leaning toward the latter to be honest.

Regardless, the best way to avoid confrontation is to simply befriend people; it starts with respecting people, i.e, The Golden Rule.

Probably a bit of both since cold approaches are pretty creepy here. And to be honest, there are far better ways of getting to know women.

 

[DonJoseCantosie]

^Enough with the Creepy in britain sh1t. "There are far better ways of getting to know women" besides a social circle, mention them.

 

[Smack]

Clubs, bars, flat parties, house parties, a college class, a university class (that is, if there are any girls in your uni class - in mine there aren't). All are much more effective than cold approaching women when they are trying to get around their day to day business.

 

[Nutz]

Wow, there sure are a lot of limiting beliefs in this thread. I lived in England for 5 1/2 years and all this crap about it being creepy to talk to girls during the day is complete bunk. Girls LOVED it when we hit on them. Some were apprehensive when we'd hit on them, but after a minute or two the conversations went along swimmingly. You just have to get out of your head and be smooth when you do it. Remember, delivery is 90% of the sarge. If you're creeping them out then you're obviously doing something wrong and it's no wonder security is getting involved.

 

[Warrior74]

Wow, there sure are a lot of limiting beliefs in this thread. I lived in England for 5 1/2 years and all this crap about it being creepy to talk to girls during the day is complete bunk. Girls LOVED it when we hit on them. Some were apprehensive when we'd hit on them, but after a minute or two the conversations went along swimmingly. You just have to get out of your head and be smooth when you do it. Remember, delivery is 90% of the sarge. If you're creeping them out then you're obviously doing something wrong and it's no wonder security is getting involved.

LOL. Let's see. I diss everyone in this thread for telling this guy he's doing it wrong. Then I turn around say he must be doing it wrong! LOLOLOLOLOL:crackup: Gotta love these nuckleheads around here!