Dating A Work Colleague, Good Or Bad Idea?

[soulforge]

Just wanted your thoughts and experiences of dating or getting into an LTR with a chick you work with.

Current girl I am seeing, she left the company a few days ago, so I no longer have to see her around at work, but from my personal experience.. dating a work colleague is a fukin headache.

Several pitfalls you might experience.

01. If things go wrong between you, and she turns out to be bitter and angry or crazy, well be prepared for her to run your name into the muck, or even worse report you to HR over some minor thing.

02. Other work colleagues will try to smash her, if it's something you have kept on the low. Yes some of your work colleagues will hit on her, and you going to have to suck it up.

03. If she breaks up or dumps you, you going to have to see her at work every day and probably see her flirting with or fukin some of your work colleagues, especially if she hates you now.

I'm glad to be out the situation now, however be interesting to hear your experience of dating a work colleague?

Maybe it was a positive experience for you.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Only if I worked a dumb McJob or job I was already planning on leaving within 2 weeks in a professional setting.

 

[SW15]

For white collar professional work, dating a work colleague is a big no. If either you or her have put in 2 weeks resignation notice, then collecting her phone number/arranging a date is an option.

In other types of work (mainly McJobs), the answer is go for it. Part time retail work doesn't matter. Most people who work service sector McJobs have short tenures at their jobs. Replacing a McJob is much easier than replacing a white collar professional job. A lot of retail warehouse workers at places like Walmart and Target date cashiers.

If you're a nightclub bouncer, you can date a stripper or a female bartender. Bartenders and waitresses at more conventional restaurants date too.

 

[Dr.Suave]

Bad Idea 99% of the time

 

[soulforge]

You're going to do it anyway. You only listen to our advice when it's fallen apart lol

What do you mean. Nothing has fallen apart. She don't work with me anymore, problem solved

 

[Barrister]

PROS: You see her everyday, she understands when you talk about work, you know a lot of the same people.

CONS: You see her everyday, she will want to talk about work with you, you know a lot of the same people, she can ruin you professionally and/or file a BS sexual complaint against you.

You decide if it is worth it. I know how I feel.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

My dad has been terminated twice from the backlash of fvcking women in the workplace and screwing them over. It always pvssed me off because that instability affected me and my sister growing up and our overall opinion of him. If you are in a professional work environment, make sure you are in it for the long run (like Pam and Jim in the office) and not doing it just spin plates. If it doesn't work out somehow then NO MORE girls in your office.

 

[soulforge]

My dad has been terminated twice from the backlash of fvcking women in the workplace and screwing them over. It always pvssed me off because that instability affected me and my sister growing up and our overall opinion of him. If you are in a professional work environment, make sure you are in it for the long run (like Pam and Jim in the office) and not doing it just spin plates. If it doesn't work out somehow then NO MORE girls in your office.

Yeh I can see how how easily things can go wrong when your dating a girl from work.

The other issue is, that it can actually effect your frame.

Your more likely to be careful and tread on eggshells if the your dating a work colleague.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Yeh I can see how how easily things can go wrong when your dating a girl from work.

The other issue is, that it can actually effect your frame.

Your more likely to be careful and tread on eggshells if the your dating a work colleague.

I would assume frame wouldn't be an issue because usually the girl would be the one with the highest interest in an office setting. It is too risky, so the girl needs to be showing obvious signs of high interest towards me before I make a move. Now, if you are over there blindly shooting your shot at every female in the workplace then you are a dumb arse lol.

 

[espanish]

another problem with dating a current or former coworker is what i like to call "conflict of interest"
imagine you get close with her and you start telling her secrets "I cheated on my time sheet" "i hate the boss's wife, she is such an idiot"
I would rather date someone who doesn't know where I work

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I never do it. Not worth the headache unless it's a situation where you almost never see her or work at separate locations, etc.

If it's a situation where you see each other every day, no way.

I actually ended up dating someone for a while that worked at the same company as I did but at a different location but it was happenstance as I met her on OLD and it didn't say what company she worked for.

 

[soulforge]

I never do it. Not worth the headache unless it's a situation where you almost never see her or work at separate locations, etc.

If it's a situation where you see each other every day, no way.

I actually ended up dating someone for a while that worked at the same company as I did but at a different location but it was happenstance as I met her on OLD and it didn't say what company she worked for.

Only once in my 48 years have I done this.. and this is with the current girl.

Luckily she has moved onto another job now.. but the 3-4 months she worked in the same company as me, it was a fukin headache to some degree.

Nobody knows we was dating at all... Not a single person. She didn't tell anyone and neither did I.

However atleast 2-3 of my work colleague tried it on with her (obviously they didn't know she is seeing me) they all got rejected haha

But it can actually get very messy.. I absolutely wouldn't recommend anyone does it, neither will I date a work colleague ever again.

 

[Mike32ct]

There is always some workplace Chad that is on his 7th girlfriend, and nothing bad every happens to him.

Then some other guy tries to date one girl in the workplace and umm, things don't turn out so well for him.

TLDR: I think of it as a “He’s a professional; do NOT try this at home” sort of thing lol.

 

[AureliusMaximus]

Haven't this subject been beaten do death already in multiple threads here on SS forums?
Is there really a need to discuss this further as we all know the obvious answer?

The only exception to the hard rule of "No, very bad idea" there is, is if your job is just a "fun job" e.g. an extra job that you do not really care about and don't depend upon. In that case fvck the whole staff (Including the men and the office dog too if you want <<< obviously a joke if you don't get it), because it doesn't matter.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

There is always some workplace Chad that is on his 7th girlfriend, and nothing bad every happens to him.

Then some other guy tries to date one girl in the workplace and umm, things don't turn out so well for him.

TLDR: I think of it as a “He’s a professional; do NOT try this at home” sort of thing lol.

Maybe at a Mcjob, but my former boss was worshipped as a God at the company and got fired over sexual allegations from a business retreat.

 

[SW15]

Then some other guy tries to date one girl in the workplace and umm, things don't turn out so well for him.

In a way, blue collar men are fortunate in this regard because they often don't have a lot of female co-workers. Construction workers don't have the option of dating women at work. I'd say auto mechanics don't have this option either. Aircraft mechanics are also unlikely to get with the women working the customer service type jobs inside the airport or get with the flight attendants. There are some stories about flight attendants and pilots/first officers having sex but I don't think that combination is as common as bouncer-stripper or bouncer-female bartender.

If you are in a professional work environment, make sure you are in it for the long run (like Pam and Jim in the office) and not doing it just spin plates.

Even dating with long term intention in a workplace is a bad idea.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

Even dating with long term intention in a workplace is a bad idea.

I mean who is going to pass up their hottest potential prospect if it happens to be at work lol? I feel like if you are talking to a girl in a work environment, I would assume she is doing some pursuing on her part too. If you are cold approaching every female in the office then yeahhhh you dumb.

 

[manfrombelow]

I am always on the Anti Workplace Romance side.

However, in rare cases if you and her can both agree to keep everything at FWB/sex buddies level then why the hell not. Life is too short anyway.

 

[SW15]

I mean who is going to pass up their hottest potential prospect if it happens to be at work lol? I feel like if you are talking to a girl in a work environment, I would assume she is doing some pursuing on her part too.

It would have to be a really hot prospect with some very strong IOIs and some compatibilities that would be very good longer term. Most interactions in a white collar environment aren't going to meet that criteria. There are downsides for both men and women in longer term dating within the workplace, but men have more downsides than women in it.

A lot of white collar working environments give off a rather non-sexual vibe too. There have been white collar jobs I've had where I observed everyone's interactions within the workplace and there was absolutely no sexual vibe in anyone's interactions.

 

[Jake_Gyllenhaal69]

It would have to be a really hot prospect with some very strong IOIs and some compatibilities that would be very good longer term. Most interactions in a white collar environment aren't going to meet that criteria. There are downsides for both men and women in longer term dating within the workplace, but men have more downsides than women in it.

A lot of white collar working environments give off a rather non-sexual vibe too. There have been white collar jobs I've had where I observed everyone's interactions within the workplace and there was absolutely no sexual vibe in anyone's interactions.

Your average woman is definitely going to utilize scarcity and the mermaid effect in most offices. For example, Pam would be considered average at best in a normal environment, but put her in a man cave/fat woman office setting and her value skyrockets