I've stalked a girl for years when I was much younger. I've frozen up and been unable to speak properly to a girl I approached. I've been utterly rejected in public by someone I thought would at least greet me, probably because my social personality was a complete wreck at the time. I've failed to act on more opportunities than I have hairs on my head. I've treated women like delicate flowers. I learned from that to view being beta as pathetic, including what I myself have done and what my personality was. If you can't view your past self like that then you still identify with it. Deesade today is not the beta I was insulting in my post.
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