Dating a girl who had childhood trauma from a crazy mom

[RangerMIke]

BWV, I personally wish there were more people like you on this forum. There’s too many whiny people that abandon ship at the first sign of trouble. “She didn’t respond to you within an hour? DUMP! She didn’t immediately offer to pay and insist on at least half? DUMP!! Every few weeks there’s a night when she’s too tired for sex? DUMP!!! She has spoken to another male in her entire life that wasn’t related to her? DUMP!” But I digress. If someone has a problem with their personality that just makes them human. If you meet a girl with no problems that just means she’s hiding something much deeper. Most problems are handleable. It’s the discretion to deal with these problems that makes you a man and not a boy.
Now if she blames you for any of her problems, yes, dump that. But not before.

There are plenty of women that were not raised by miserable harpies and jack@sses. Go find one of those. All I'm suggesting is that it's easier and better to buy something that doesn't need fixing. Go ahead and date crazy chicks... I do.... they can be fun, but don't think you are going to fix her and build anything permanent.

If you want to bring a woman into your life, bring in a partner that is going to complement your life, not a life long project. We are not talking about dating... we are talking about a LIFE decision. Anyway... if you want to bring in a woman that was emotionally damaged in childhood, then you better be prepared to fight all the fvcking time. You new 'normal' will be stress, and you will need to bust your @ss keeping her in line, and GOD help you if you have kids

 

[AureliusMaximus]

Dating a girl who had childhood trauma from a crazy mom

More red flags than a Russian communist parade. Damaged goods, run boi!

 

[Willie Naylor]

If she can tell you how many ounces in a brick.... she ain't the one.

 

[Bokanovsky]

Yes... run. Run fast and do not stop.

My ex was the same way, great girl... checked all the boxes... however, she had a mom that totally fvcked with her head. Eventually all that cr@p rises to the surface. Trust me... therapy only works to fix a person so they can function in society.... it does NOT fix relationships. DO NOT think you can fix her... she has to fix herself.

There are plenty of women raised in normal circumstances that you can really build something lasting. Could this work out? Well sure... you can also win a game of Russian Rolette.

Agree with Ranger Mike. You may feel bad for this woman, since it's not her fault that she was (by the sounds of it) mentally abused by her mother. However, serial killers also typically come from broken homes and are victims of domestic abuse. It's also not their fault that they were abused as kids. And yet, you wouldn't even think about befriending someone you knew to be a serial killer, right? So why would you consider dating a woman with so much baggage? She may not kill physically, but she will destroy you psychologically.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Been seeing this girl for a while, on the surface she is great,kind and ticks a lot of my boxes in a women.

However she did reveal to me that she grow in a house with a ****ed up mom who traumatize the **** out of her, the mom have Borderline Personality Disorder. she told me some really insane stories about her childhood and that mom really damaged her.

She is and was going to therapy for a long time, but she admits she is far from being healed from that.

my question, do you any of you guys have an opinion or experience with this? should I abort ship as this can get bad down the line considering her past?

There's 9billion people on the planet. Why pick 1 let alone one with the baggage? I am no shrink. I don't know if it is female logic victimhood or actual real sit that happened and she's seeking professional help to work through. It's not my first rodeo.

Typically women do nothing but *****. If she's not getting it fixed she's always got it to fall back on when she goes slumming one night.

 

[DEEZEDBRAH]

Not about to get into a big argument, but the irony isn't lost there. Just about everything you read on here is a result of the user's personal experience or things they've witnessed, or other stereotypes. They haven't had success in [location], therefore all girls in [location] are x, y, z. They saw a tall guy get approached but not short guys, therefore only tall guys get approached. Guys from [country] have no chance. Girls after a certain age are x, y, z. Or during their x years. All girls want x. You can't be nice or you're doomed. The list goes on and on. Not even beginning with the fact that it's all nonsense and doesn't match the reality of what's out there, or what some of us have experienced.

I've even mentioned a couple times that what I (or anyone, for that matter) says is based on personal experience; that we all have our own views and so on.

Either way I stand by what I said; it's what I experienced. And gave my opinion. It's not a "projection", and I am well aware of what that means.

People should only speak from experience. The alternative is YouTube married dating coaches and rants about hypergamy. Shilling ebooks or digital programs on say Game when they couldn't pull or pickup at gunpoint. But but buy my rubbish program.