Dating a divorce woman with 15yrs old kid....

[amoka]

Folk, there is this hot lady in one of my dancing class who shows great interest level in me. She smile, hags, and touches me like I'm 'her man'. Anyway, I like her but she has a 15 years old son, who is 10 years younger than I am. She got divorce 14 years a go. She's a secretary at my school--different department though.

Last friday, I was walking around campus and saw her passing by. I approached her and talked to her for some time. I asked for her number and she supplied it without much effort. I planned on taking her our sometimes but I don't know how to go about it.... I've never been with a divorce woman before, much less a woman with a child over half my age. I planned on maybe taking her out this friday but I simply don't know how to go about it.

I've heard people say, older women, or at least women that have married before turned to prefare AFC style of dating.... you know, the so called "romantic dating".

 

[azanon]

Is this the same woman in the other thread? lol

 

[Gangster Of Love]

A woman is a woman is a woman. Forget about anything special you need to do in a situation like this. If her interest is already high, why resort to what you've heard older women like, as in AFC type of stuff. No woman likes afc type of stuff. AFC's don't have a clue, are clingy, possesive, insecure, and want to buy her attention. No matter what her age is, a woman doesn't like that type of stuff.

What is your goal with this particular woman? Figure it out. If its to have fun, etc. then you need to bed her ASAP, after that, you can do whatever you want, you decide what kind of relationship it will be, and how "romantic" you want to treat her.

Ask her if she knows how to cook. Take it from there. You will get to know her and to your goal much faster. Take advantage of the fact that she has high interest level. Do you think the last guy who banged her was worried and insecure about her kid, her being older and hot, etc? Make your move fast, or else you will become her new young girlfriend.

 

[amoka]

Is this the same woman in the other thread? lol

No. The woman in the other thread is in my salsa class. This one however is in my Swing class.

 

[WestCoaster]

I'd casually date her. I made the mistake of dating a divorcee with kids in my 20's and regretted it. You're at the prime of your life in your 20's, sounds like you're in college with a plethora of hotties -- every college has hotties -- and they are age appropriate.

Spend your time and emotional energy on SINGLE/NO KID, age appropriate, young, exciting, non-divorcee women. I'm sure I'll get ripped for saying this, tough crap. I'm right on this because I've been where you were.

You'll thank me later.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

AMOKA, how old is this lady?

 

[amoka]

AMOKA, how old is this lady?

Not sure... my guess is around 33. definately less than 37yrs

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Ah, lets take the mean average then and call her 35. Time for DJ math again students:

Problem #1: If AMOKA dates a 35 y.o. woman who was married for 14 years before her divorce when did she get married? If you answered 21 you are correct.

Problem#2: If the above woman has a 15 y.o. son at what age did she give birth? 20 is the correct answer. Bonus question: at what age did she get pregnant? If you said 19 you are correct.

Review questions: Being married and a mommie at such an early age, what do you suppose this woman's social skill set is like now that she finds herself single at 35? What can we assume her motivations generally are considering the phase of life she finds herself in after 14 years of sex with the same guy she's likely been with since high school? How do you suppose a woman in her present conditions would approach a man 10 years her junior after having had to take care of an infant, toddler, tween, and now teenager all through her 20's and most of her 30's while her friends of the same age were enjoying the prime of their lives? Class?

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Ah, lets take the mean average then and call her 35. Time for DJ math again students:

Problem #1: If AMOKA dates a 35 y.o. woman who was married for 14 years before her divorce when did she get married? If you answered 21 you are correct.

Problem#2: If the above woman has a 15 y.o. son at what age did she give birth? 20 is the correct answer. Bonus question: at what age did she get pregnant? If you said 19 you are correct.

Review questions: Being married and a mommie at such an early age, what do you suppose this woman's social skill set is like now that she finds herself single at 35? What can we assume her motivations generally are considering the phase of life she finds herself in after 14 years of sex with the same guy she's likely been with since high school? How do you suppose a woman in her present conditions would approach a man 10 years her junior after having had to take care of an infant, toddler, tween, and now teenager all through her 20's and most of her 30's while her friends of the same age were enjoying the prime of their lives? Class?

Me, me teacher!! (raising hand!!!). Aaaaaaaaaaaaah. Hmmmm. She probably wants to have fun and get laid.

 

[amoka]

If AMOKA dates a 35 y.o. woman who was married for 14 years before her divorce when did she get married? If you answered 21 you are correct

She did not get married for 14 year. She got divorced 14 years ago. Thus, when the child was 1yr old. I'm not sure of the time frame of her marriage.

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Ah, the rest of it still makes sense though,..

my bad

 

[WestCoaster]

Amoka ... Why are you removing yourself from the wonderful 20-29 age/single/no kid dating pool?

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Amoka ... Why are you removing yourself from the wonderful 20-29 age/single/no kid dating pool?

Amoka, why don't you just date all of them? You're single and need to meet and get involved with anybody you want.

 

[WestCoaster]

Actually Gangster, he needs to meet and focus on quality single women his age. He's too young to be tied down with kids and an older mommy ... that is unless he wants to cash in his freedom. And trust me, dating a woman with kids does eliminate some of your freedom.

Ah heck, you won't listen to me ... they rarely do.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Actually Gangster, he needs to meet and focus on quality single women his age. He's too young to be tied down with kids and an older mommy ... that is unless he wants to cash in his freedom. And trust me, dating a woman with kids does eliminate some of your freedom.

Ah heck, you won't listen to me ... they rarely do.

Who says he has to be tied down with anybody? If he's gonna be tied down, it will happen with a single mommy or with younger girls. If he just wants to date (dating = porkin'), and have freedom to see anybody he wants, why tell him to focus on what you and I would pick for LTR?

 

[decades]

unless you are a guy who can remain detached and are able to resist getting sucked into to something, I would say don't get involved. I would say stick to younger women your own age with no kids. yes its possible she could be fine but why not get to know her first to make sure of her character? if you do date her, keep it Casual man. Generally speaking this is not a good idea.

regards

 

[WestCoaster]

Gangster, I've been there ... big mistake at his age.

Rule of thumb: In your 20's, date women in their 20's. They are their prime at this time of life. It's tougher to date 20 somethings as you get older.

This is a HUGE mistake he's making, an enormous one. I know what I'm talking about because I did it and passed up opportunities with single/no kid great women.

He should listen to me Gangster and not do what he wants to do because what he wants to do is a mistake. Trust me on this, it is a MISTAKE.

He should be focusing on young, exciting, physically fit, unattached women in their 20's; the opportunities to date these women dwindle with time.

He's stupid if he doesn't do this and frankly should be cyber punk slapped more than he's getting here ... and I don't care how much he can get laid by the 30 something, it's a wrong move.

 

[Gangster Of Love]

Gangster, I've been there ... big mistake at his age.

Rule of thumb: In your 20's, date women in their 20's. They are their prime at this time of life. It's tougher to date 20 somethings as you get older.

This is a HUGE mistake he's making, an enormous one. I know what I'm talking about because I did it and passed up opportunities with single/no kid great women.

He should listen to me Gangster and not do what he wants to do because what he wants to do is a mistake. Trust me on this, it is a MISTAKE.

He should be focusing on young, exciting, physically fit, unattached women in their 20's; the opportunities to date these women dwindle with time.

He's stupid if he doesn't do this and frankly should be cyber punk slapped more than he's getting here ... and I don't care how much he can get laid by the 30 something, it's a wrong move.

Don't disagree with you totally. He should lay any woman he wants. Unless you are getting the feeling he's too much into this one, and she's gonna ruin him, and he's gonna exclusively develop a long time commited relationship and one-itis, as it sounds you did, I say date them all. Never said to give up the young hunnies. You probably wasted time by focusing on one woman, who was older, and did miss out. I don't know how into this woman he is.

As far as opportunities to date 20 year old will dwindle, that is coming from a point of scarcity and limitation. If you are in your 30's, you will have as much success with unatached 20+ year olds. Speaking from experience here. If you are in your twenties, yet don't know how to handle these young women, then they won't date a guy in their 20's either, they will end up with guys in their 30's.

 

[Latinoman]

Who says he has to be tied down with anybody? If he's gonna be tied down, it will happen with a single mommy or with younger girls. If he just wants to date (dating = porkin'), and have freedom to see anybody he wants, why tell him to focus on what you and I would pick for LTR?

The thing is...it is BEYOND my imagination and comprehension how a man that is in his mid 20s and going to college is focusing on the kind of woman he is focusing.

If he wants to date or just have fun...he has UNLIMITED access of 18-25 year old woman. UNLIMITED access to sex.

It is being in a cow farm...but instead of eating steak...he is eating hot dogs.

 

[Latinoman]

As far as opportunities to date 20 year old will dwindle, that is coming from a point of scarcity and limitation. If you are in your 30's, you will have as much success with unatached 20+ year olds. Speaking from experience here. If you are in your twenties, yet don't know how to handle these young women, then they won't date a guy in their 20's either, they will end up with guys in their 30's.

EXCELLENT POINTS!

However...he has plenty of opportunities! He goes to college! And he is in his mid 20s (making him the "mature" man in college).

I understand if he was getting laid with that particular woman. But the fact is...he is analyzing and trying to figure out HOW to get laid with that woman. If he is going to go through a tedious effort, then it is WORTHLESS (considering the other opportunities).