dates where girls make you pay

[comic_relief]

Didn't you read what he said... note the key words:

-Dumped
-Parasite

That's all you have to know.

if his ego was supposed to prevent it then why did he date her in the first place was the joke.

comic_relief

 

[Tha Realnezz]

On a date I pay...if the chic works and has her own money and we've been seeing eachother for a minute..we're splitting..i'm sorry..

Now if she's short,tips,special occasions,ect,...of course I pay.

Now if shes' a girl but you have no intentions (you shouldn't be doing this anyways and that's why)...yet you invited you pay for the meal,drinks,whatever..etc..but no more cuz it isnt a date..

 

[bigjohnson]

I think this came up in another thread but I'll bring it up again. Given the premise that if you ask, you pay; how often do you pay your buds way when you ask them to get together for a guy's night out? How many rounds do you regularly buy?

As I said there are a few factors at work, but first to directly address your question, we generally all try to pay and a compromise is reached. If someone is a cheapass they don't get invited very often. Similarly, if it's obvious she's here for the meal, it's her last one on me. It's not a big deal .

The factors that differ in the date situation are that by taking the reins and picking the venue, suggesting food, trying to pay the check I get to put her in the frame of mind that I'm calling the shots, and in my experience most women will respond favorably to it. Guys in a group will consider it a challenge.

Providing a meal has never gotten me into the AFC camp due to supplication yet - it's just food. Supplication zone entry seems to be more the candy flowers and trinkets thing but I suppose that might vary with social strata.

Here food is cheap and it's not considered a huge thing to try to take the check.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...Here food is cheap and it's not considered a huge thing to try to take the check.

So it really comes down to how cheap you are? That it's alright as long as the food is cheap? Does this mean that you can only sarge women that enjoy cheap cuisine? Is cheap food a good enough way to impress a woman since a guy's personality doesn't seem to be of much importance as opposed to the venue to impress the woman? I mean really, how far will a .49 cent White Castle burger get you with a woman? Do you have to splurge and spend $5 to buy her a sack of 10?

 

[bigjohnson]

Cheap as in "less than I carry in my pocket". Money for a car or a gift is in a different league than food anywhere within reason and the amount isn't a big factor in any case, it's the attitude. If it's a$30 tab or a $170 tab they're both decent meals and in any case what goes on during is important.

But I think you know that.

EDIT:

I never really analysed it but maybe it's that "everyone has to eat" and offering to pay is good manners? I dunno but the dynamic is definitely different than buying a gift.

 

[The Librarian]

I have no problem with volunteering to pay. I think it can be a very gentlemanly gesture, especially accompanied by other gestures of the same during the meal.

I do, however, have a problem with a woman making me pay for her food/ticket/whatever. I don't know how else to view it except as a sign of disrespect. That being said, I would probably end up paying to avoid a scene, but I would definitely make the woman jump through some hoops to get back into my good graces.

 

[bigjohnson]

... paying to avoid a scene, but I would definitely make the woman jump through some hoops to get back into my good graces.

Precisely. It's your call if there will be a second date after all. Was it worth it to you? NO? Finito.

 

[mexican_player2]

thanks for the replies, some dudes have good points of view, other dont, but still thanks.

if anyone know the mack advisor King Flex (appeared on mtv made), well he has a board, so i posted the same thread there to see what response i would get from all the True macks. this is what i got:

This one is easy you answer the queastion yourself.The rule is if she likes you she'll break bread.She didnt like you at all.To her you was trick an she felt that you was a sucker.if a female like you you dont have to spend no money you can take them somewhere for free.

a very different response from what i got here huh...interesting...

 

[bigjohnson]

The IQ of that poster versus the average poster here should be all the hint you need, but "up to you" as Thai girls say.

 

[bigjohnson]

I let them pay some - I buy tickets, she gets the popcorn or whatever, but the key word is LET, as in allow. If she offers I decide what she can pay for. I decide, and that's how it is. Women don't seem to mind, and I don't tend to go out more than once with the sort who never offers to pay.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

..This current girl I'm seeing bought ME drinks on two different occasions before going out as more than friends, and I know she doesn't have as much money as me. So I took her out to a fancy dinner and paid after we were more than friends, cuz I really like this girl.

Doesn't that make qualifying a woman so much easier? Guy's tend to get so hung up on impressing the woman that they become blind to whether a woman is even worth his effort.

..
Women still make 70 cents on the dollar.

Don't believe the hype. Women no longer earn less than men because of sex, it's because they don't negotiate their salaries with the fervor that men do.

..
Truth is, really hot girls are use to guys paying for everything. The model hot girls I see in Montreal ride around in their sugar daddies Lambo, a "hot" guy means nothing to them if he's broke. It's the principle of scarcity. In my advanced econ classes I don't see any hot girls. Why? Cuz they don't want to work that hard, and they know they don't have to-it's kind of the feminist backlash.

Damn good observation.

..
If money helps my game, so be it-as long as I study game theory, and am one step ahead so I don't get played.

Money doesn't buy you happiness, at best it just pays for the search...

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I let them pay some - I buy tickets, she gets the popcorn or whatever, but the key word is LET, as in allow. If she offers I decide what she can pay for. I decide, and that's how it is. Women don't seem to mind, and I don't tend to go out more than once with the sort who never offers to pay.

I'm all for the sharing the cost of the date thing but that's only for women where there is an established, mutual interest. There's little logic in paying for a woman who you haven't qualified or even know whether she's even interested in you personally.

 

[bigjohnson]

For the cost of 30-90 minutes of my workday I can take them out and learn what I need to know (qualify them); that's completely reasonable to me. I guess your mileage may vary as they say.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

For the cost of 30-90 minutes of my workday I can take them out and learn what I need to know (qualify them); that's completely reasonable to me. I guess your mileage may vary as they say.

Yep. Some guys need to pay to find out and others don't.

 

[bigjohnson]

I didn't always go that way in the past, and I could stop doing it this way now, it's not a matter of need, it's a matter of expediency. No need to get defensive if that's what that was.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I didn't always go that way in the past, and I could stop doing it this way now, it's not a matter of need, it's a matter of expediency...

Uh-huh...

 

[WaterTiger]

I'm from another generation remember, and when I was young, guys paid. Period. It was still quite new that women paid for meals, tickets, etc.

I like the "I invite, I pay; you invite, you pay" system in general. This way you can control the price of the bill by choice of restuarant. If she wants to go to an expensive place, ask her if she's paying! If she's not paying, she has no choice in the place.

As for splitting the bill...that's what my girlfriends and I do. If a guy wants to split the bill....he's just became a girlfriend.

I will repeat, for the 1000th time, that the first couple dates should be inexpensive. Coffee & pastry at Starbucks, lunch at a Chinese place, Breakfast at Denny's. If she starts complaining...then you know you have a "Dinner Wh.ore". Dating is about spending TIME not MONEY!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...I like the "I invite, I pay; you invite, you pay" system in general. This way you can control the price of the bill by choice of restuarant. ...

Out of curiosity, how often do you ask out guys who you aren't dating and pay their way?

...
I will repeat, for the 1000th time, that the first couple dates should be inexpensive. Coffee & pastry at Starbucks, lunch at a Chinese place, Breakfast at Denny's. If she starts complaining...then you know you have a "Dinner Wh.ore". Dating is about spending TIME not MONEY!

I still say that there are few guys who are able/comfortable to have a good date over a simple cup of coffee; lack of intimate social skills.

 

[WaterTiger]

Out of curiosity, how often do you ask out guys who you aren't dating and pay their way?

You mean like taking out a male co-worker/family member who's had a bad day to cheer them up, or for birthdays or something?

 

[Dark Chivalry]

I still say that there are few guys who are able/comfortable to have a good date over a simple cup of coffee; lack of intimate social skills.

Would learning some social skill not be better than avoiding simpler dates?

If a guy has a limited budget, he can avoid taking new women out at dinner time(5-9pm starting times), so having to pay is not that much of an issue. He can do coffee, sandwiches, ice cream for the first 2-3 dates. If the girl offers to pay or split the bill, that's fine and he can let her, if she doesn't he can pay, knowing the date is within his means. Either way he can relax and be at ease, confident, which is the most important thing when dating.

In my experience, being a niggardly churl is as deadly as lavishly supplicating a woman. Both make you look low status, like you put too much importance on the money and the girl.