Dancefloor: How to transition from spaced front-to-front to close-up kino/grinding

numlock

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say you ask a girl to dance, and you typically start off facing each other with some space in between, just doing your own thing.

how can you transition into getting her in close, perhaps by grabbing her hip and holding onto her lower back and doing some front-to-front closeup/grinding dancing.......without coming on too strong? i have this big fear of pulling a move like that and just getting smacked in the face, or worse, kicked out of the club. how do you know if the girl is willing to even make that transition with you? it seems like a big jump from spaced out dancing, to up-close-and-personal dancing -- especially since you're going from virtually no kino to tons of kino

thanks in advance!
 

bugsquish

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eye contact + smile reciprocated? repeatedly?
take her hand and ease in slowly ;)
 

numlock

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do most girls at clubs actually want to get in that close? i'm thinking that there are only a select few who would.....what to do about the rest?
 

tx_xp

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Don't ask, just do it.

Dance however you want to, if it feels right to dance from a distance do so. If your the only one in the place not dancing close, there may be a clue for you.

Instead of starting off from a distance try starting off close, start from the bump and grind then back off some to see what happens.

If something dosn't go right, she backs you off, you back off all the way and do your own thing but not with her.
 

bugsquish

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if they dont wanna take ur hand then ur screwed, otherwise it always seems to work... theyre usually drunk remember lol
if she doesnt, theres 50 more who will
 

Peace and Quiet

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BruticusMaximus

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I just grab them and pull them in! They'll either appreciate the confidence or they'll scarper... in which case they never liked you enough and wouldn't have gone for it anyway.

If you're not willing to risk it then don't do it, but what's the point in never taking a risk...
 

Boricua_33015

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**** these days around here in Miami, all the girls like to grind.
 

kevbo

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it may sound stupid, but a friend of mine and myself have a little thing we say for this type of situation. if we don't want people to catch on, and surprisingly it confuses them more than you'd expect, we just say "Nike" for there slogan, "Just do it." as i said, stupid, but i've always found it encouraging. that one word has helped me accomplish things i'd never thought i'd do when it comes to women.
 

DJStudent

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Hey numlock,

I have always liked to bump and grind but never had the courage to really do it. Sometimes the girl is loose and she does it anyway. Finding those girls are rare and often they are taken by some other fool. I just started checking out clubs but learned very fast. I think this is my third time at club and I pretty much grind all night long.

My first time at a club I only dance with 2 different girls the WHOLE NIGHT. I got rejected 3 times and was feeling pretty down. I came with a bunch of girlfriends but I didn't want to dance with them right away. I wanted to see if I can work my "game" which I had none. The second time wasn't so bad but still I wasn't happy with how I was dance with the girls (usually a space between us instead of 2 girls humping from all sorts of directions).

My third time at the club, I was more confident since reading more from this site aswell as some personal experiences. But what also helped was I met this short player. He was pretty cool guy and told me a few things that helped out. One thing is that once a girl is in the club she's FREE GAME. One thing you DON'T do in the club is ask a girl to dance. You just grab their hands and pull them to you EVEN if they are dancing with whoever. I was shocked at first but he showed me and even pull some girl off some other guy and told her to dance with me. I was impress, at the end of the night he had about 3 girls hanging around him when he came in with none. Just start dancing close to the girl. YOU ARE CONFIDENT. She doesn't know who you are, most likely she'll try to please you because she's doesn't know what she's doing. Just do what you want to do and she'll comply. Also once your confidence has risen, learn to grab the girl and start dancing. She'll like you for your confidence and will (hopefully get really dirty with you:p).
 

At this point you probably have a woman (or multiple women) chasing you around, calling you all the time, wanting to be with you. So let's talk about how to KEEP a woman interested in you once you have her. This is BIG! There is nothing worse than getting dumped by a woman that you really, really like.

Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.

megatron

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First of all numlock, your on the right track. Alot of people use the cold approach of just going behind some chick and grinding her ass. This will often either get you the hand, or the "walk-off". Or, if your lucky, she'll recipcrocate by grinding you back. Anyway, to me, this isn't very DJ-like.

What I would do is introduce myself to a girl who's dancing (or get a girl to dance with you, whatever. But the former is always easier because the chick is already 'in the rhythm and the moment').

Firstly, make sure you know what your doing, hopefully you know how to dance. Bust some moves in front of her and then see if she seems to be feeling your vibe, i.e swinging her hips excitedly at you as well and not looking around thinking, "oh ****, he's a dud, err...help".

Once you've danced for about one song (this is mainly to create vibe/gauge vibe), start doing the knees bent in front, body crouched back move (I'm no good with dance terms) and get yourself closer to her. Usually, if the girl knows what she's doing and they like what your doing, when you get back up, she will do the same. As she goes down and starts to come back up, quickly hold out your hands and pull her up, as if she needs the help. Don't JERK! Then when your holding her hands, it's time to get CLOSE. One hand holding her hands, the other quickly moving to her hips. And then start swaying, gently moving her hips with you. Then whisper in her ears, "damn, your a sexy/smooth/good dancer", or "are you enjoying this?". And it nearly always goes on to HEAVY front on grinding from there.

This is what I do, and it always gets to grinding front on, if your lucky, all that front grinding will get her wet, move in for a kiss and a make out may ensue.

Any other tips to share?
 

DJStudent

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Mega, some of the stuff your saying is good but for most situation the lines of communication is through action. You can talk to her but only in short burst.

Another thing you can do to get her to grind front to front is to just turn her. If you're from behind just take her hand, lift it in ther air and nudge left or right. She will turn to see what you're trying to do.

Go learn salsa or swing if you don't know how to dance. These are what's called social dances. They will teach you basic footsteps and rythym. If you know one of these dances you can get the girl in any positions you want plus look good doing it.
 

DankNuggs

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Are you kidding me? Can you dance? most girls you dance with 'spaced front to front' as you say are waiting to be held close and ground up...Make sure you get a mean hard on and press it into her, whispering in her ear "you did this to me"
 

Anonymous56

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Even I can do it..if the chick is feeling you...grab her hips turn her around slightly(she will get the hint) just dont force her around. Then just lean closer..like I said, if she wants to she will do it. Thats the only kind of dancing I can do anyway so im pretty screwed if the chick isnt grinding into me lol.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Originally posted by bugsquish
eye contact + smile reciprocated? repeatedly?
take her hand and ease in slowly ;)
Yep, it's all in the eyes....
 

D4H

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wtf? where do u live? The only type of dancing you'll ever see around here is freak dancing.
 

Kineti[C]harm

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Originally posted by numlock
do most girls at clubs actually want to get in that close? i'm thinking that there are only a select few who would.....what to do about the rest?
Yes all girls want this, or not ALL but most girls... Atleast if you are attractive and know how to dance.
 

D4H

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At the clubs around here.. girls freak dance with guys who just go up behind them without even asking to dance... its considered normal dancing now, 2003.
 

sixtonoize

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Is there anyone who can point me in the direction of learning HOW to dance? It seems that every time I go out to a club, there's no shortage of women, and no shortage of them who will dance with me. However, whenever I try to "dance" with someone, it usually only lasts a short while, and I can never really seem to lock into the same rhythm as her, and as soon as I do, she changes it up, and I'm back to being lost again. It always seems that these women want to dance with me, but then they figure out that I'm really not all that hot on the dance floor, and I end up getting NEXTed.

I know that there's a whole legion of guys out there like myself, and any shove in the right direction would be greatly appreciated.
 
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