"Creative" = Ghost? Blow To Self-Esteem

[Tony197]

This is one of those "I know the problem, I'm looking for confirmation - or am I crazy?" posts. I'm not looking for answers, more group therapy, haha.

Ghosting in my recent experience has been a HUGE issue. Very demoralizing. But I'm starting to notice a pattern (sorry, I'm slow) - I'm a confident, professional right-of-center man who's not ashamed to be a man. Not perfect. Have room to improve. But 85% above most other guys. But due to my social circle I've been dating girls who are some combo of liberal and artistic, to even flat-out angry, misandrists.

1.) Actress. Dated for 18 months. Dumped me one week after vacation. She left me for a "sensitive, feminist liberal actor." Lied to me about it. Treated me like **** when we ran into each other.
2.) Artist. Went out. Made out. 2nd base. Ghosted.
3.) Ballerina. Went out. Didn't make out. Ghosted.
4.) Actress. Went out. Made out. 2nd base. Ghosted. Went out again a few months later and she acted like nothing happened. Lots of red flags - mommy issues, doesn't get along with sister, Satanist (yep, you read that right).
5.) Actress. Went out for two months. Lots of sexual activity. Used phrases like "mansplaining" and "patriarchy", though. Ghosted while things were moving towards relationship territory. I contacted her two weeks later just to say "sup?" and she seemed pissed, like it was me who played the disappearing act. This girl brags on social media about being called a man-hater, btw.

So clearly there's a pattern (and it helps me to write it down). Have any of you experienced this? What is the deal with "creative" types and man-hating? Is the problem that I have low confidence with women and don't go after better girls - but where are these better girls?

 

[marmel75]

Why do you keep going out with these type of women? You want to get a different result, date different women.

Obviously you don't do it for them.

 

[RangerMIke]

Hmmm. I date the same kind of chicks... it's just the way things are here where I live. Flaking behavior is completely normal with these chicks, I will say I think you are doing pretty good, you are obviously making an effort and getting these chicks on dates. I've had better success closing and keeping them around for a little while and if that is what you are interested in doing then I'll tell you what I do.

Go to some of her Earth Muffin, BLM rallies, and other bull sh!t events. You don't have to sign up for any of that stupidity, but let her think she has a chance to 'bring you around'. This makes her want to put effort towards you which gets her committed. Then game her like any other chick and you'll do fine. I am NOT suggesting you compromise your beliefs, but just be a little open minded... listen to the stupidity and go ahead and debate her friends without getting angry, just don't fight with the chick... your attitude with you is you want to have fun, not go to war.

 

[sazc]

I agree with @marmel75 why are you wasting your time on females that are not compatible with your mindset and outlook on life? You are creating no room for someone more compatible to find you or you to find them, while youn are tied up wuth these non compatible females. If you cant find compatible females in your social circle as you have acknowledged then go outside of your social circle.

Half the battle in finding a quality partner is beginning by dating compatible people.

 

[bigneil]

I only date girls who voted for Trump.

This blatantly hypocritical Senator tried to use the term Mansplaining to another Senator and had her as-s handed to her.

 

[Tony197]

You'll forgive me - I'm an INTJ and perhaps overly logical in my pursuits (romantic or otherwise). When something doesn't make sense, I so desperately want to formulate an explanation for it that I ignore the reality that sometimes the best explanation - the only explanation - is there is none.

Perhaps there is some ego as well. If a woman hates men (or at least confident, conservative, masculine-behaving men), but dates me, that's an ego boost. When she bails for those very same reason (and rudely doing so) I act surprised, which is foolish on my part.

Self-absorbed, emotional people do self-absorbed, emotional things. Case closed.

 

[RichardTheFrog]

A ballerina?

I didn't know those actually existed.

With the number of people trying hard to find work, hard to believe some people can make it as a ballerina.

 

[marmel75]

You'll forgive me - I'm an INTJ and perhaps overly logical in my pursuits (romantic or otherwise). When something doesn't make sense, I so desperately want to formulate an explanation for it that I ignore the reality that sometimes the best explanation - the only explanation - is there is none.

Perhaps there is some ego as well. If a woman hates men (or at least confident, conservative, masculine-behaving men), but dates me, that's an ego boost. When she bails for those very same reason (and rudely doing so) I act surprised, which is foolish on my part.

Self-absorbed, emotional people do self-absorbed, emotional things. Case closed.

I am an INTJ as well, but having been in sales and retail for 12 or 13 years I developed closer to 50/50 between I and E...still prefer to be alone at times but when I'm out people swear I'm extroverted because I have no issues talking and carrying on conversations.

My point is don't use your natural INTJ as a self limiting factor in evolving into what you want to become. If there are some areas you'd like to change or improve then do it. Just because something isn't a natural tendency doesn't mean that you can't improve it.

 

[SmooveMooves]

I hate personality tests. If your reading this and haven't gotten one yet, don't. It does nothing but limit your brain and lock you into your comfort zone.

"Oh, I'm a liokjnmwwe? Guess that explains why I'm always in the house alone mental masturbating online. Nothing wrong with that, it's my personality."